People can become stuck in life due to the heavy emphasis they place on certain thoughts. Take, for instance, a person who is always worried he/she will say or do the wrong thing. We’ve all wondered if we should have said this, or done something differently. This pattern of second-guessing or trying to become a mind reader can lead to a great deal of anticipatory anxiety. Too much pressure is self-imposed to be what you consider perfect and in doing so, levels of fulfillment or just plain fun in situations become tied to your own self-evaluation. Constantly critiquing yourself can also lead self-esteem and overall confidence levels to plummet because you simply react to the actions and words of others without giving a circumstance the attention it might need.Whenever we interact with our environment, we always need to be cognizant that in order to make informed decisions, it is necessary to properly process them. In this way we come to an understanding about areas in our life we feel comfortable and sure about and other areas that might need a little changing.
For example, in any situation, you can ask yourself the following:
- How important is this situation (or person) to me?
- Will it still be important to me a week from now?
- Is the way I’m currently dealing with this situation/person comfortable for me or is it unpleasant?
- Will I feel the same about my actions if I distance myself a little from it?
- Are there negative consequences to my behavior?
Sometimes we act out in a situation or automatically give it a negative label before we have all the information in order to make such an assumption. Letting that assumption be the predominant reason why a negative association is made can often lead you to withdraw from people or situations that might actually benefit you.
Take, for instance, a person who is interested in something, but because of some comments made to him/her, he/she decides he/she just isn’t good enough, and should give up the idea. If you let such a thought be the deciding reason why you don’t pursue something, then you might well pass up on an opportunity to make a real difference in the world, or at least, pursue something you’re passionate. Don’t fall victim to letting your internal thought process be too weak to challenge the comments or reactions of the outside world. While their comments can be helpful, to a degree, we must each follow our own inner compass. Thinking this, and doing it, however, are often two different things.
Samet Yahya Bilir is a toy collector and writes about toys and games at his blog. You can check his website for toy news, pictures, videos, and reviews, such as army toy trucks for kids and monster high dolls.