science universe

Dressing to Flatter Your Body

In This Chapter

▶ Being realistic about your body type

▶ Accentuating the parts of your body you love and camouflaging the ones you don’t

▶ Flattering your figure no matter what your size

▶ Knowing when to have your clothing altered

just because an article of clothing is in style does not mean it belongs in your closet. I know, I know, sometimes you walk by the window of your favorite store, you see that perfect dress, and you say to yourself, “I have to have it!” Well, before you whip out your credit card or wallet, wait! Just because that dress looks fabulous on the mannequin does not mean it’ll look fabulous on you. If you try it on, and it looks nothing like what it looked like on the mannequin, put it down; do not buy it. If it’s not a 10 on you, it won’t be a 10 in your closet (see Chapter 2 for information on my 10 System).

How can you ensure that everything you choose is a 10? You need to pay attention to your size and body type. These are key factors in deciding what you can and can’t wear. I don’t mean to steer you away from trying to make the latest trends work for you. I just want you to figure out the best way to flatter your figure so you look and feel your best. This chapter tells you how.

Golden Rules and Good Advice for Finding Clothing that Compliments You

Every woman has something to complain about when she looks in the mirror. (If you don’t, good for you — you can move to Chapter 4!) But if you’re like most women, once you fix the one thing that bothers you, another seems to emerge. You lose weight; now it’s time for smoother skin. You get your teeth whitened; now it’s time for buffer-looking arms. The journey never ends. Why do so many of us feel the constant dissatisfaction? One theory is that the closer we get to “perfection,” the more annoying other imperfections feel! (Exhausting, isn’t it?)

With that said, we all have parts of our bodies that are great and parts that, well, just aren’t. You need to be honest with yourself, know what your strong features are, and then pick stylish items for your wardrobe that flatter those areas. The key is to find a style that compliments your shape, size, and stature. The following sections show you how.

I’m not saying that some items in your closet should highlight what works best on you. I’m saying all of them should. You should always be your sexiest self, whether in sweaters, sweats, or sizzling evening wear.

Whatever your shape, you may have noticed that some designers fit you better than others. Why? Because each designer uses a fit model as the standard for their sizing, and each fit model is different, which means that each designer’s garments fit differently. Because it costs more for manufacturers to provide a variety of fits for every garment, they just stick to the one base- line fit and size up and down from there. So if you find a particular brand that works for your body, see what else is in that designer’s line. Chances are good that many of the line’s items will also work for you.

Getting key measurements

Most women have a good idea what their measurements are, but rather than assume you know, get an accurate measurement. Going to a tailor will give you more accurate measurements, but you can certainly get a close approximation handling the measuring tape yourself. The measurements that you definitely need are your chest, waist, hips, and inseam. You may also want to add your thigh and upper arm measurements. Figure 3-1 shows where to place the tape to measure each of these areas.

When taking these measurements, use a cloth tape measure, not a metal one. Make sure that, when you circle your chest, waist, or hips, the tape is level and neither too tight nor too loose. Also measure yourself on your bare skin, not over clothes. And this may sound silly, but don’t trust your memory — be sure to write the measurements down!

✓ Chest: Measure the circumference of your chest. Place one end of the tape measure at the fullest part of your bust, wrap it around (under your armpits, around your shoulder blades, and back to the front) to get the measurement.

✓ Waist: Measure the circumference of your waist. Use the tape to circle your waist (sort of like a belt would) at your natural waistline, which is located above your belly button and below your rib cage. (If you bend to the side, the crease that forms is your natural waistline.) Don’t suck in your stomach,or you’ll get a false measurement. If you generally wear your clothes below your waist, take that measurement as well.

Figure 3-1: Measure yourself properly.

✓ Hips: Measure the circumference of your hips. Start at one hip and wrap the tape measure around your rear, around the other hip, and back to where you started. Make sure the tape is over the largest part of your buttocks. Because making sure the tape is level back there can be hard, try to do it in front of a mirror.

✓ Inseam: This is the distance from the uppermost inner part of your thigh to the bottom of your ankle. You can measure your inseam in two ways.

• With help: While you’re wearing a pair of pants, have a friend stretch the tape from your crotch to the bottom of your ankle.

• Without help: If you have a pair of pants that fit you perfectly (and they shouldn’t be too loose around the waist), measure the inseam of the pants, again from the crotch to the hem.

The proper inseam on a pair of pants you’re going to purchase will depend on the height of the heel you’ll be wearing with them.

✓ Thigh: Measure the circumference of the fullest part of your thigh. Wrap the tape measure around your thigh from front to back and then around to the front. You may be tempted to cheat by lowering the tape measure a few inches but then you won’t get an accurate measurement.

✓ Upper arm: Measure the circumference of your arm. Wrap the tape measure around the widest part of your upper arm from front to back and around to the start point.

✓ Sleeve length: Get help for this one because it’s hard to do yourself. Place your hand at your waist (your elbow should be bent at a 90-degree angle).

Then start at the middle of the back of your neck and measure to your shoulder, down your arm to the elbow, and then on to the wrist.

You may need a family member or friend to assist you with the measurements. If you have a garment that fits perfectly, measuring the garment rather than your body can be a good substitute.

The fruit basket: Determining your shape

What is the ideal shape today? I bet you’re saying, “It depends on who you ask.” If you look at many fashion magazines, you’ll likely see the ideal as tall and thin. If you ask the average male, he may say a woman who is “curvaceous.” And if you ask yourself? Hmmm, that may take a little while to answer. But here’s the deal: In order to begin to build a wardrobe that expresses your personal style, you must determine what your shape is.

Okay, don’t roll your eyes, but yes, I’m asking you to assess your body and then compare yourself to a piece of fruit. You’ve probably heard these terms before, but perhaps this is the first time you’ll actually identify yourself with food that usually works as a centerpiece on your kitchen table.

The shape of many women can be described as bearing a similarity to either a pear or an apple. Now, take a look in the mirror and decide which of these you resemble most. If you’re a pear, you tend to carry your weight around your hip and bottom area, and if you’re an apple, you tend to carry your weight in your upper body.

Once you know your shape, your next job is to figure out how to use fashion to accentuate the parts you love and help hide the parts you don’t. By dis- covering how to draw attention away from problem areas, you then have the general knowledge you need to dress in the most flattering way for your body type, no matter the occasion.

Whether you’re a pear or apple does not mean you’re overweight. Apples simply carry their weight in their upper bodies, and pears tend to carry their weight around their hips and bottoms. The trick is to use your clothing to make your figure more proportioned on top and bottom. What if you don’t fall into either category (some women are cut pretty straight up and down; others are fairly proportional)? Fortunately, you don’t have to be either one or the other to make this information work for you. No matter your shape, you can use the advice I give in the following sections to make the most of your clothing! Plus, you have more leeway with what looks good.

The most common fruit: The pear

The most common shape for women is the pear shape (see Figure 3-2). What that means is that the widest part of your body is below your waist, around your hips. Remember, you can be tall, short, heavy, or skinny and still be pear-shaped. If you’re a pear, your fashion goal is to elongate your figure so that you look less bottom-heavy. The first line of attack to reaching this goal is to balance your hips and your shoulders while showing off your curves. The key here is to accentuate your top half. For example, if the eye is drawn to your cute top or the scarf around your neck, it takes the focus off your bottom half.

Always wear something darker and slimming on the bottom, like dark jeans or slacks, or a dark knee-length pencil skirt or A-line skirt. And, no, that doesn’t mean that you always have to wear black on the bottom, but make sure that the bottom is solid in color and darker than whatever you have on top.

As a pear, you want to direct attention to your tops. Fun colors, prints, or details at the neck all serve the purpose of drawing the eye away from the hip area. Just make sure that your tops don’t end at your hips because that draws unnecessary attention there. Figure 3-3 shows how combining a tailored, flared pant with an attractive, eye-catching top can play up a pear’s best features.

Read on for even more pear-pleasing suggestions:

✓ Go for clean, tailored lines on the bottom. Whatever you wear on the bottom should always be more tailored, such as flat front pants. With skirts, the A-line or flared skirt is a great piece to use as a base to accentuate a beautiful selection of tops. Stay away from pleats, side pockets, or anything that is going to add dimension to this area.

If you wear a belt, make sure it’s slim and the same color as your pants (a wide belt draws more attention to the area you’re trying to deemphasize). If you belt a dress, make sure the belt sits higher up at your waistline rather than your hips. Better yet, wear a top that’s gathered around the stomach. Doing so hides your tummy if you need to, while creating dimension someplace other than your hips.

Figure 3-3: The perfect outfit for a pear.

✓ Wear pants or jeans that have a flare on the bottom. A flared leg draws the eye away from your hips and creates a more flattering line for your whole body. Conversely, stay away from capri or tapered pants. They drive the eye right to the hips.

✓ Check out tunic tops or dresses. You can wear a tunic top or dress as  long as it fits properly. (Don’t wear a tunic top or dress if it’s in any way clinging to your belly or your hips.) One that fits properly gives a clean, elongating line while camouflaging everything underneath. The great thing about this style is that it accentuates your arms and your whole upper body and makes you appear taller and leaner at the same time.

✓ Make use of jackets. Jackets are great for pear-shaped people because they usually have interesting details around the neckline and give more structure to the shoulder area, where you’re trying to direct the focus. When wearing a jacket, choose one that ends past your hips, not at them. A longer jacket, such as a cute blazer, creates a long, lean line and covers the hip area.

✓ Experiment with different necklines. A deeper, more plunging neckline elongates your upper body and draws all the attention upward. Try wearing a long necklace to fill in the neckline, which also adds to the lengthening of your upper body.

✓ Show off your shoulders. The shoulders are a great and sexy part of a woman’s body. Especially if you’re pear-shaped, you want to show them off by wearing off-the-shoulder tops that expose one or both shoulders. These tops immediately attract attention and steer the eye exactly where you want it. Ruffles or puffy sleeves on your top are also great for pears.

When you keep it simple on the bottom, you have so much room to play with tops and accessories. You can start to stock your wardrobe with great fitting pants, jeans, and skirts, and then play with colors, prints, and less expensive, trendier items on top. Try a fun scarf around your neck, a fabulous necklace, or a great pair of earrings. These items all serve to draw the eye up to your best feature — your face!

Choose materials that hold their form like wool slacks or denim. They flatter and streamline your shape. Avoid any tight knits on the bottom because they cling and accentuate your width.

The next most popular fruit: The apple

Apple-shaped women (see Figure 3-4) are fuller around the middle. If they gain weight, it shows up around their belly and upper body. They’re usually larger-breasted and their upper arms and shoulders are broader, too. Their legs tend to be thin and their butts tend to be flat.

As an apple, you want to emphasize your strong points (your bust and legs) while camouflaging your weaker ones (your midsection), keeping it all in balance. Since the idea is to draw the eye toward those parts of your body that shine and away from those that don’t, you want to show off your great legs.

✓ You can wear patterns, just follow these guidelines. Any large pattern is going to draw attention, so don’t wear a large pattern on top. Wear a small, subtle pattern on top, or save the patterns for the bottom. A great print skirt with a solid sweater set is a great way to express yourself while also flattering your figure.

✓ If you have a fuller chest area (and are comfortable accentuating this area), draw attention to it. Doing so keeps straying eyes from your midsection. Wear a sexy V-neck. (Ooh la la!)

Wear bras that support your bust. And any straps on your tops should be wide enough to cover your bra straps. (See Chapter 14 to find out more about the different types of bras.)

✓ If, like most apples, you have great legs, short skirts are in order. If you’re in the office, the shortest your skirt should be is just above the knee. If you’re going out for a night on the town, go a little higher!

✓ A-line skirts also work with your figure. Since they flare out from the waist, A-line skirts offer balance and proportion to your upper half.

✓ If you don’t have much of a backside, and you want to give the illusion that you do, wear pants with back pockets. Your jeans should have a rise lower than your natural, wider waist. Don’t wear pants with pleated fronts, as that only makes your middle look larger.

Don’t wear pants that are too tight, even if you have good legs, because that makes your top seem extra large. Remember, while you want to emphasize your better attributes, the challenge is to do so while also keeping your overall look in balance.

✓ Go for longer jackets. Your jackets should be on the long side, never ending at waist level. Make sure they come down to your hips to create a long, lean line right over your waist and tummy area. And opt for single- breasted jackets that you can keep unbuttoned. A double-breasted blazer that needs to be buttoned to look right only makes you look larger on top.

✓ Opt for drop waists. A dress or top with a drop waist (that narrows down at the point of your hips instead of your true waist) bypasses any constricting fabric around the tummy area and makes your torso appear longer and leaner overall.

Figure 3-5 shows an outfit appropriate for an apple-shaped woman. It hides the problem areas and accentuates the positive features.

If you’re an apple with great legs, you can get away with anything on the bottom, even knits. As far as your top goes, stay with materials that offer more structure, like a straight cut cotton blouse, or something blousy like silk. Both of these camouflage the midsection. You want to avoid tight knits on top because they cling and accentuate this area.

Where’s your waistline?

Another common attribute of women is to be either short-waisted or long-waisted. To deter- mine your own “waistedness,” follow these simple steps:

1. Measure the distance between your armpit and your waist.

2. Measure the distance between your waist and the bottom of your bum.

Figure 3-5: An A-line skirt is a great cut for an apple-shaped woman.

3. Compare the measurements.

If the two aren’t equal, you’re either short- or long-waisted: If the first measurement is shorter, you’re short-waisted. If the second measurement is shorter, you’re long-waisted (see Figure 3-6).

Short-waisted women

Maintaining balance is one important key to flattering your figure and dress- ing for your body type. If you’re short-waisted, you’re going to look out of balance with a top half that appears smaller than your bottom half. Finding ways to make your top half look proportionate to your bottom half, by making your waist appear longer, helps you achieve balance.

✓ Try a top with vertical lines. These lines give the illusion that your top half is longer than it is. The stripes can be as subtle as a pinstripe blouse — anything that keeps the eye moving up and down right over your waist works.

✓ Wear tops that you can leave untucked. This is another way of hiding where your waist actually is.

A deep V-neck draws the focus upwards and away from your waist (this is a little tip that works for everyone — not just short-waisted women).

✓ Avoid dresses with a waistband. If you do need a belt, choose a narrow one that’s in the same color as your outfit to minimize the attention to the waist area.

✓ If you wear prints, limit it to your top and make sure your top ends by your hips. This hides your true waistline, and the break between the pattern and the solid bottom make your waist seem longer than it really is.

What you don’t want to do is draw attention directly to your middle, as the left-hand model in Figure 3-7 does. The wide belt at the waist accentuates the short waist, making the top half look out of proportion with the bottom half. The tunic top, on the other hand (also in Figure 3-7), elongates the waistline and makes the body look balanced.

Figure 3-7: A don’t (left) and a do (right) for short-waisted women.

Long-waisted women

The problem that long-waisted women have is that their body type makes their legs seem shorter. If you’re a long-waisted woman, you need to use your clothes to add length to your bottom half:

✓ Choose dresses that have an A-line or an empire waist. These styles make your waist appear higher than it is, thus making your legs appear longer too.

✓ Choose shirts that cover your waist. The short, stomach-baring shirts are a problem for long-waisted women. When these types of shirts were the trend, it became difficult for long-waisted women to find tops that didn’t look like they’d shrunk in the dryer. (By the way, anyone over the age of 12 should avoid this trend at all costs. No adult women should ever wear stomach-bearing tops. And, no, it doesn’t matter if you spend every day at the gym!)

✓ Choose pants that are at your natural waistline or a bit above. You definitely want to avoid hip huggers because they make your legs look even shorter.

Never feel as though you’re not “in” if you aren’t wearing what are supposedly the current trends. Even the fashion industry makes mistakes. You don’t have to follow its lead! As I’ve mentioned before, don’t let a trend dictate what you wear. Not all trends work with all body types, and you don’t want to be a fashion victim. Better to stick with your own style and wear clothes that flatter you.

✓ Opt for short jackets. The bolero style, for example, can be very elegant on a long-waisted woman.

✓ Wear heels. They add length to your legs.

✓ To heighten the effect of longer legs, make sure your shoes match your bottom. If you’re wearing a skirt or dress, matching hosiery also adds to that effect, as does a wide belt that matches the color of your bottom.

Whatever you do, avoid styles and cuts that make your legs look shorter (see Figure 3-8). Low-waisted jeans with a shorter top only accentuate your long waist, cut you in the middle, and make your legs look shorter. High-waisted pants, on the other hand, will elongate your legs, and raise the appearance of your natural waistline (also in Figure 3-8).

Figure 3-8: A don’t (left) and a do (right) for long-waisted women.

Tackling other problem areas

The preceding sections concentrate on the waist and hips because those are the most common problem areas, but there are others as well:

✓ Full arms: If your arms are very full, try wearing tops that extend the shoulder, such as a drop shoulder. Adding a colorful shawl in cooler months can also work well. And, of course, tops with lots of fabric in the sleeve can also disguise what’s underneath.

✓ Long necks: If you don’t like your neck because you feel it’s too long, use scarves, turtle necks, cowls, or high collars to make it appear less elongated.

✓ Short necks: For a short neck, you want to expand the neck area by making it seem that the area just below the neck appears to be a part of it. For that, keep your neckline open by unbuttoning a top button or wearing V-necks.

✓ Too-large or too-small chest: If you want to make your chest area seem smaller than it is, a fuller top deemphasizes what’s underneath. You can also wear darker, solid tops with a higher neckline. These minimize the look of the bust area and make it appear smaller. If you have small breasts and want them to appear larger, try wearing tops in lighter colors or with prints. These draw attention to your bust and also make it appear bigger, as do V-necks, sweetheart necks, or any neckline that shows off the bust area. And a very colorful scarf tied in a knot at chest level draws the eye there and accentuates the bust as well.

Remember these two general principles: Cover problem areas with some creative fashion sense, and highlight the other parts of your body that you find attractive to draw the eye there.

Getting Your Size Right

Clothing is available for all body types. Whether you’re buying pieces from the general misses collections, the petites department, or the plus-size department, make sure your clothing fits you properly.

Clothing sizes are never exact because no two people have the exact same measurements. In many instances, the compromises that you have to make to wear “your” size are not that noticeable. Other times, you really must have your clothing altered to get the right fit. If you can find a manufacturer whose size is really close to yours, buy whatever you need and like from that designer’s line.

Petites

Regular misses clothing is designed to fit a woman who is 5 feet 5 inches. If you’re significantly shorter than that, even if some measurements like your waist or bust match a particular regular size, many others like sleeve length or inseam won’t. So women on the shorter side need to shop in the petite section in order to get the best fit.

As you’d expect, if you’re shorter than average, your goal for your wardrobe is to make yourself seem as long as possible. So petites should wear clothes that don’t cut them off in the middle but rather offer the eye the longest possible line.

✓ Clothing that offers vertical lines such as stripes or is monochromatic (or has colors in the same family) are your best bet. If you wear patterns, make sure that they’re smaller (larger patterns can overwhelm you). Stay away from opposites, such as a stark white shirt and black pants. These color combos cut you in the middle. If you want to wear contrasting colors, make sure that the overall look remains vertical so you maintain a longer appearance. For example, go ahead and wear a red blouse with a charcoal gray skirt, but make sure that you also have a matching charcoal jacket.

✓ As a petite, you want to avoid horizontal lines. Wide belts or sashes shouldn’t be a part of your wardrobe, unless they’re the identical color of your outfit.

✓ Detailing can also be useful. A long skirt with a line of buttons down the side adds length to the eye. A wrap dress with an edge that stands out, for example one made of satin, offers a long diagonal line, which has much the same effect as a vertical line.

✓ Need I mention heels? Shoes are most women’s favorite accessory, not to mention biggest weak spot when shopping! Women always make an excuse to buy more shoes. Well, petite women, as long as you can walk in them, break out the high heels! They’ll give you a couple extra inches and, in most cases, give your confidence a boost, too.

Figure 3-9: A pinstripe top is a good choice for a petite woman.

Figure 3-9 shows an outfit that makes a petite woman look taller because of the pinstripes and because the color scheme is the same from top to bottom.

The taller woman

Many tall women likely didn’t love their height growing up. (It’s never easy being the tallest girl in the class!) But get older and being tall is likely easier. Now it’s just about finding clothing that flatters your long body!

Unless you’re over 6 feet tall or have some real figure flaws that you’re trying to hide (refer to the earlier section “The fruit basket: Determining your shape”), you’ll have an easy time shopping and finding clothing that works and looks great on your body. Most models and fit models (models designers use to size their clothing) are on the taller side, and so most designers cut according to those models.

The Baby Phat line of clothing is designed by Kimora Lee Simmons who is 6 feet tall, and tall women report that she has adapted her line to suit taller women, so you may want to check out her clothing line. You can find Baby Phat designs at Macy’s as well as online at www.babyphat.com.

If, for some reason, you’re uncomfortable with your height and want to draw attention away from it, your goal should be to differentiate your top half from the bottom to keep the eyes from seeing you as one long, lean line. To accomplish this, you can use horizontal stripes or a wide belt. Both keep eyes from looking you up and down. Another way to accomplish this is to wear different colors on your top and bottom halves. Black and white does this well, as do any two contrasting colors. A taller woman can also use larger accessories, like a large bag and chunky jewelry. If your accessories are eye-catching and/or in bright colors, they attract all the attention. Figure 3-10 demonstrates how you can wear a contrasting black belt to cut the body in half and make it appear shorter.

If you’re really trying to appear shorter, flat shoes (obviously) help. Tons of cute flats are out there these days, from boots to ballet flats to sandals to flip-flops. The variety is endless and a very welcome addition to most tall women’s wardrobes!

Figure 3-10: Tall women look great in contrasting colors and flats.

Plus sizes

If a size 14 in misses clothing is too small for you, you fall into the plus-size category. You’ll have a larger variety to choose from and a much easier time finding clothing that fits properly and works on your body type if you shop in the plus-size department.

As a plus-size woman, you’re still a fruit (lucky you!) and need to follow the rules that fit your body shape (head to the earlier section “The fruit basket: Determining your shape” to get the appropriate tips).

In addition to the fruit tips, as a plus-size woman, you’re going to look better in solids or small patterns because with so much extra material, any larger pattern is going to make too strong an impact. If you wear plus sizes, a monochromatic look will help elongate your appearance, as Figure 3-11 shows. Of course, while muted colors are going to blend in more, don’t be afraid of color. If the clothing fits right, is flattering, and accentuates your better attributes, go for it. Bright accessories and statement jewelry are also a great way to make any basic outfit pop.

Since a little added height also makes you look more proportioned, wearing heels is a good idea, especially when you dress up. If you’re showing your legs and wearing hosiery, don’t wear hose with patterns or bright colors, how- ever, because that makes your legs look larger. Better to stick with dark tights or flesh-colored hose.

Depending on your exact shape, low-rise pants may be good for you because they don’t squeeze you around the middle (assuming that’s your widest part). You want to avoid wide belts because they draw the eye to your waist. When you wear a belt, choose one that matches the color of your top or bottom. Doing so deemphasizes your waistline.

Figure 3-11: A monochromatic look.

If you haven’t done so already, try out Spanx (head to Chapter 14 for these and other undergarments). Spanx are made to hold you in basically wherever you need a little help! They should become your best friend whether you’re a size 2 or 20!

If you’re plus-size and constantly choose loose dresses because you think they hide what you’re insecure about underneath, stop! Loose dresses with an abundance of material make you look even bigger (see Figure 3-12). They also make you look like you don’t have any shape at all and do nothing to accentuate the attributes you should be showing off.

Just because you’re plus-size doesn’t mean you need to be wearing mu-mus. Make an effort to find clothing that flatters your body. Every woman has beautiful parts and those should be accentuated, not hidden under a tent. Along those same lines, be careful that your clothing is not too tight. Avoid materials that cling to your body, like spandex.

Evens and Odds: Understanding Clothes Sizing

In most settings, two is twice as big as one, but not in women’s clothing. In the past, most women either made their own clothes or had them custom-made, so there was no need for standardized sizes. But once most women started buying their clothes ready-made, a system of standardization was required. In the early 1950s, the National Bureau of Standards, a government agency, was called in to study the situation. An Acting Secretary of the Subcommittee on Body Measurements for Wearing Apparel Sizes was appointed and various engineers and mathematicians were brought on board. After three years of hard work, the standards were set.

Figure 3-12: Don’t choose anything that resembles a mu-mu.

The operative word in the preceding sentence is “were.” Even though the federal government spent three years working to figure out standard sizes for clothing, this relatively easy-to-understand system didn’t last long because women started to grow larger. In order to please women who didn’t want to have to say they were buying sizes that were at the higher end of the scale, the fashion industry introduced vanity sizing, which effectively moved every size down by four notches, so what was once a size 10 became a size 6. In 1983, the government threw up its hands and got out of the sizing business altogether, and so sizes today are a bit of a free-for-all. Because the government doesn’t dictate standard sizes anymore, you can’t always be confident that what a label reads on one garment will be at all similar to another. In other words, a size 8 made by one manufacturer does not necessarily fit the same way a size 8 from another manufacturer does.

Today the only vestige of the old standard sizes can be found in patterns, which have steadfastly retained the old sizing formula.

Nowadays clothing manufacturers have developed their own systems and the result can be a bit confusing. Consider these examples:

✓ Junior clothing includes only odd numbers, 0–13. The fit is more youthful, which generally means smaller and younger in style. If you’re past your teenage years, you should generally not be buying junior clothing. It most likely won’t fit properly and is not really age appropriate.

✓ Women’s clothing (often called “misses”) runs from sizes 0 to 14, even numbers only. These sizes are for most women, unless you’re petite, plus-size, or still young enough to wear junior sizes. These garments are cut with the assumption that women have fuller figures, taking into account the bust and hips.

✓ Plus-size clothing in most clothing lines is anything above a size 14. However, there have been recent changes made with women’s or misses clothing. Now you can find some misses clothing up to a size 20. A true plus size will be designated, say, 18W. The difference is that the plus size is cut larger in the bust and middle.

So what does all this mean to you? If you understand that the size indication on a garment is only a rough guideline, you’ll be much more careful to try on every item you buy before you make the purchase so that you won’t have drawers filled with clothing that doesn’t fit properly.

The Beauty of Altering

Just because you’re a size 6 and the label on the dress in your hand says “Size 6” doesn’t mean that dress is going to fit you. Instead of getting frustrated by this, find yourself an expert tailor. Yes, it’s going to force you to spend some of the money you normally would on buying clothes on getting the ones you have fixed, but you’ll end up with a wardrobe filled with clothes that fit you like a glove. Believe me, you can do more with a closet full of clothing made up of all 10s than you could with a lot of 5s laying around.

Here’s the situation with getting things altered: Do it when it makes sense. If you find the perfect dress in a size 14 but are yourself a size 2, you shouldn’t take the dress to the tailor to make it fit. But if you find a perfect dress that just needs to be a little shorter, or the waist needs to be taken in, or the arms are too long, the tailor should be your next stop.

A great fit is nearly priceless. So if the clothing is really worth it — it looks great and makes you feel great — invest the money to have it tailored properly. If it doesn’t fit properly, you can bet it’s not a 10 (refer to Chapter 2), and it shouldn’t be in your closet, let alone on your body!

Finding someone schooled in the art of altering clothes can be difficult. Here are some suggestions:

✓ Department stores often have tailors on the spot who can measure you and do the necessary work. If this is an option, grab it. The department stores know the tailors’ work well and use them time and again. You’re pretty much guaranteed quality workmanship.

✓ Dry cleaners are often a good source, either because they have a tailor in house or know of someone. If you need something like a simple hem, the dry cleaner is a safe bet. If the alteration is more complicated, con- sider an alteration shop.

✓ Alteration shops specialize in alterations and should be able to do what you require.

A referral from someone who has used a good tailor is always your best bet. The last thing you want is to experiment with a new tailor if you have a complicated alteration or the garment was very expensive. You may want to have two people, one who is less expensive and you can trust to do little jobs (like the hem on a pair of pants) and another who specializes in dressy dresses and more complicated items.

Not so long ago, most women could sew a simple hem. (I can’t, so don’t feel badly if you can’t either.) That was because pants only came in one long length and so they all had to be hemmed to the proper length. Then manufacturers started selling pants, especially jeans, in a multiple of inseam lengths and the concept of having clothes altered started to fade, especially as sewing machines became less and less common a household appliance. (If you don’t own a sewing machine or are laughing at the notion of it, you’re not the only one!)

Dressing to Flatter Your Body

In This Chapter

▶ Being realistic about your body type

▶ Accentuating the parts of your body you love and camouflaging the ones you don’t

▶ Flattering your figure no matter what your size

▶ Knowing when to have your clothing altered

just because an article of clothing is in style does not mean it belongs in your closet. I know, I know, sometimes you walk by the window of your favorite store, you see that perfect dress, and you say to yourself, “I have to have it!” Well, before you whip out your credit card or wallet, wait! Just because that dress looks fabulous on the mannequin does not mean it’ll look fabulous on you. If you try it on, and it looks nothing like what it looked like on the mannequin, put it down; do not buy it. If it’s not a 10 on you, it won’t be a 10 in your closet (see Chapter 2 for information on my 10 System).

How can you ensure that everything you choose is a 10? You need to pay attention to your size and body type. These are key factors in deciding what you can and can’t wear. I don’t mean to steer you away from trying to make the latest trends work for you. I just want you to figure out the best way to flatter your figure so you look and feel your best. This chapter tells you how.

Golden Rules and Good Advice for Finding Clothing that Compliments You

Every woman has something to complain about when she looks in the mirror. (If you don’t, good for you — you can move to Chapter 4!) But if you’re like most women, once you fix the one thing that bothers you, another seems to emerge. You lose weight; now it’s time for smoother skin. You get your teeth whitened; now it’s time for buffer-looking arms. The journey never ends. Why do so many of us feel the constant dissatisfaction? One theory is that the closer we get to “perfection,” the more annoying other imperfections feel! (Exhausting, isn’t it?)

With that said, we all have parts of our bodies that are great and parts that, well, just aren’t. You need to be honest with yourself, know what your strong features are, and then pick stylish items for your wardrobe that flatter those areas. The key is to find a style that compliments your shape, size, and stature. The following sections show you how.

I’m not saying that some items in your closet should highlight what works best on you. I’m saying all of them should. You should always be your sexiest self, whether in sweaters, sweats, or sizzling evening wear.

Whatever your shape, you may have noticed that some designers fit you better than others. Why? Because each designer uses a fit model as the standard for their sizing, and each fit model is different, which means that each designer’s garments fit differently. Because it costs more for manufacturers to provide a variety of fits for every garment, they just stick to the one base- line fit and size up and down from there. So if you find a particular brand that works for your body, see what else is in that designer’s line. Chances are good that many of the line’s items will also work for you.

Getting key measurements

Most women have a good idea what their measurements are, but rather than assume you know, get an accurate measurement. Going to a tailor will give you more accurate measurements, but you can certainly get a close approximation handling the measuring tape yourself. The measurements that you definitely need are your chest, waist, hips, and inseam. You may also want to add your thigh and upper arm measurements. Figure 3-1 shows where to place the tape to measure each of these areas.

When taking these measurements, use a cloth tape measure, not a metal one. Make sure that, when you circle your chest, waist, or hips, the tape is level and neither too tight nor too loose. Also measure yourself on your bare skin, not over clothes. And this may sound silly, but don’t trust your memory — be sure to write the measurements down!

✓ Chest: Measure the circumference of your chest. Place one end of the tape measure at the fullest part of your bust, wrap it around (under your armpits, around your shoulder blades, and back to the front) to get the measurement.

✓ Waist: Measure the circumference of your waist. Use the tape to circle your waist (sort of like a belt would) at your natural waistline, which is located above your belly button and below your rib cage. (If you bend to the side, the crease that forms is your natural waistline.) Don’t suck in your stomach,or you’ll get a false measurement. If you generally wear your clothes below your waist, take that measurement as well.

Figure 3-1: Measure yourself properly.

✓ Hips: Measure the circumference of your hips. Start at one hip and wrap the tape measure around your rear, around the other hip, and back to where you started. Make sure the tape is over the largest part of your buttocks. Because making sure the tape is level back there can be hard, try to do it in front of a mirror.

✓ Inseam: This is the distance from the uppermost inner part of your thigh to the bottom of your ankle. You can measure your inseam in two ways.

• With help: While you’re wearing a pair of pants, have a friend stretch the tape from your crotch to the bottom of your ankle.

• Without help: If you have a pair of pants that fit you perfectly (and they shouldn’t be too loose around the waist), measure the inseam of the pants, again from the crotch to the hem.

The proper inseam on a pair of pants you’re going to purchase will depend on the height of the heel you’ll be wearing with them.

✓ Thigh: Measure the circumference of the fullest part of your thigh. Wrap the tape measure around your thigh from front to back and then around to the front. You may be tempted to cheat by lowering the tape measure a few inches but then you won’t get an accurate measurement.

✓ Upper arm: Measure the circumference of your arm. Wrap the tape measure around the widest part of your upper arm from front to back and around to the start point.

✓ Sleeve length: Get help for this one because it’s hard to do yourself. Place your hand at your waist (your elbow should be bent at a 90-degree angle).

Then start at the middle of the back of your neck and measure to your shoulder, down your arm to the elbow, and then on to the wrist.

You may need a family member or friend to assist you with the measurements. If you have a garment that fits perfectly, measuring the garment rather than your body can be a good substitute.

The fruit basket: Determining your shape

What is the ideal shape today? I bet you’re saying, “It depends on who you ask.” If you look at many fashion magazines, you’ll likely see the ideal as tall and thin. If you ask the average male, he may say a woman who is “curvaceous.” And if you ask yourself? Hmmm, that may take a little while to answer. But here’s the deal: In order to begin to build a wardrobe that expresses your personal style, you must determine what your shape is.

Okay, don’t roll your eyes, but yes, I’m asking you to assess your body and then compare yourself to a piece of fruit. You’ve probably heard these terms before, but perhaps this is the first time you’ll actually identify yourself with food that usually works as a centerpiece on your kitchen table.

The shape of many women can be described as bearing a similarity to either a pear or an apple. Now, take a look in the mirror and decide which of these you resemble most. If you’re a pear, you tend to carry your weight around your hip and bottom area, and if you’re an apple, you tend to carry your weight in your upper body.

Once you know your shape, your next job is to figure out how to use fashion to accentuate the parts you love and help hide the parts you don’t. By dis- covering how to draw attention away from problem areas, you then have the general knowledge you need to dress in the most flattering way for your body type, no matter the occasion.

Whether you’re a pear or apple does not mean you’re overweight. Apples simply carry their weight in their upper bodies, and pears tend to carry their weight around their hips and bottoms. The trick is to use your clothing to make your figure more proportioned on top and bottom. What if you don’t fall into either category (some women are cut pretty straight up and down; others are fairly proportional)? Fortunately, you don’t have to be either one or the other to make this information work for you. No matter your shape, you can use the advice I give in the following sections to make the most of your clothing! Plus, you have more leeway with what looks good.

The most common fruit: The pear

The most common shape for women is the pear shape (see Figure 3-2). What that means is that the widest part of your body is below your waist, around your hips. Remember, you can be tall, short, heavy, or skinny and still be pear-shaped. If you’re a pear, your fashion goal is to elongate your figure so that you look less bottom-heavy. The first line of attack to reaching this goal is to balance your hips and your shoulders while showing off your curves. The key here is to accentuate your top half. For example, if the eye is drawn to your cute top or the scarf around your neck, it takes the focus off your bottom half.

Always wear something darker and slimming on the bottom, like dark jeans or slacks, or a dark knee-length pencil skirt or A-line skirt. And, no, that doesn’t mean that you always have to wear black on the bottom, but make sure that the bottom is solid in color and darker than whatever you have on top.

As a pear, you want to direct attention to your tops. Fun colors, prints, or details at the neck all serve the purpose of drawing the eye away from the hip area. Just make sure that your tops don’t end at your hips because that draws unnecessary attention there. Figure 3-3 shows how combining a tailored, flared pant with an attractive, eye-catching top can play up a pear’s best features.

Read on for even more pear-pleasing suggestions:

✓ Go for clean, tailored lines on the bottom. Whatever you wear on the bottom should always be more tailored, such as flat front pants. With skirts, the A-line or flared skirt is a great piece to use as a base to accentuate a beautiful selection of tops. Stay away from pleats, side pockets, or anything that is going to add dimension to this area.

If you wear a belt, make sure it’s slim and the same color as your pants (a wide belt draws more attention to the area you’re trying to deemphasize). If you belt a dress, make sure the belt sits higher up at your waistline rather than your hips. Better yet, wear a top that’s gathered around the stomach. Doing so hides your tummy if you need to, while creating dimension someplace other than your hips.

Figure 3-3: The perfect outfit for a pear.

✓ Wear pants or jeans that have a flare on the bottom. A flared leg draws the eye away from your hips and creates a more flattering line for your whole body. Conversely, stay away from capri or tapered pants. They drive the eye right to the hips.

✓ Check out tunic tops or dresses. You can wear a tunic top or dress as  long as it fits properly. (Don’t wear a tunic top or dress if it’s in any way clinging to your belly or your hips.) One that fits properly gives a clean, elongating line while camouflaging everything underneath. The great thing about this style is that it accentuates your arms and your whole upper body and makes you appear taller and leaner at the same time.

✓ Make use of jackets. Jackets are great for pear-shaped people because they usually have interesting details around the neckline and give more structure to the shoulder area, where you’re trying to direct the focus. When wearing a jacket, choose one that ends past your hips, not at them. A longer jacket, such as a cute blazer, creates a long, lean line and covers the hip area.

✓ Experiment with different necklines. A deeper, more plunging neckline elongates your upper body and draws all the attention upward. Try wearing a long necklace to fill in the neckline, which also adds to the lengthening of your upper body.

✓ Show off your shoulders. The shoulders are a great and sexy part of a woman’s body. Especially if you’re pear-shaped, you want to show them off by wearing off-the-shoulder tops that expose one or both shoulders. These tops immediately attract attention and steer the eye exactly where you want it. Ruffles or puffy sleeves on your top are also great for pears.

When you keep it simple on the bottom, you have so much room to play with tops and accessories. You can start to stock your wardrobe with great fitting pants, jeans, and skirts, and then play with colors, prints, and less expensive, trendier items on top. Try a fun scarf around your neck, a fabulous necklace, or a great pair of earrings. These items all serve to draw the eye up to your best feature — your face!

Choose materials that hold their form like wool slacks or denim. They flatter and streamline your shape. Avoid any tight knits on the bottom because they cling and accentuate your width.

The next most popular fruit: The apple

Apple-shaped women (see Figure 3-4) are fuller around the middle. If they gain weight, it shows up around their belly and upper body. They’re usually larger-breasted and their upper arms and shoulders are broader, too. Their legs tend to be thin and their butts tend to be flat.

As an apple, you want to emphasize your strong points (your bust and legs) while camouflaging your weaker ones (your midsection), keeping it all in balance. Since the idea is to draw the eye toward those parts of your body that shine and away from those that don’t, you want to show off your great legs.

✓ You can wear patterns, just follow these guidelines. Any large pattern is going to draw attention, so don’t wear a large pattern on top. Wear a small, subtle pattern on top, or save the patterns for the bottom. A great print skirt with a solid sweater set is a great way to express yourself while also flattering your figure.

✓ If you have a fuller chest area (and are comfortable accentuating this area), draw attention to it. Doing so keeps straying eyes from your midsection. Wear a sexy V-neck. (Ooh la la!)

Wear bras that support your bust. And any straps on your tops should be wide enough to cover your bra straps. (See Chapter 14 to find out more about the different types of bras.)

✓ If, like most apples, you have great legs, short skirts are in order. If you’re in the office, the shortest your skirt should be is just above the knee. If you’re going out for a night on the town, go a little higher!

✓ A-line skirts also work with your figure. Since they flare out from the waist, A-line skirts offer balance and proportion to your upper half.

✓ If you don’t have much of a backside, and you want to give the illusion that you do, wear pants with back pockets. Your jeans should have a rise lower than your natural, wider waist. Don’t wear pants with pleated fronts, as that only makes your middle look larger.

Don’t wear pants that are too tight, even if you have good legs, because that makes your top seem extra large. Remember, while you want to emphasize your better attributes, the challenge is to do so while also keeping your overall look in balance.

✓ Go for longer jackets. Your jackets should be on the long side, never ending at waist level. Make sure they come down to your hips to create a long, lean line right over your waist and tummy area. And opt for single- breasted jackets that you can keep unbuttoned. A double-breasted blazer that needs to be buttoned to look right only makes you look larger on top.

✓ Opt for drop waists. A dress or top with a drop waist (that narrows down at the point of your hips instead of your true waist) bypasses any constricting fabric around the tummy area and makes your torso appear longer and leaner overall.

Figure 3-5 shows an outfit appropriate for an apple-shaped woman. It hides the problem areas and accentuates the positive features.

If you’re an apple with great legs, you can get away with anything on the bottom, even knits. As far as your top goes, stay with materials that offer more structure, like a straight cut cotton blouse, or something blousy like silk. Both of these camouflage the midsection. You want to avoid tight knits on top because they cling and accentuate this area.

Where’s your waistline?

Another common attribute of women is to be either short-waisted or long-waisted. To deter- mine your own “waistedness,” follow these simple steps:

1. Measure the distance between your armpit and your waist.

2. Measure the distance between your waist and the bottom of your bum.

Figure 3-5: An A-line skirt is a great cut for an apple-shaped woman.

3. Compare the measurements.

If the two aren’t equal, you’re either short- or long-waisted: If the first measurement is shorter, you’re short-waisted. If the second measurement is shorter, you’re long-waisted (see Figure 3-6).

Short-waisted women

Maintaining balance is one important key to flattering your figure and dress- ing for your body type. If you’re short-waisted, you’re going to look out of balance with a top half that appears smaller than your bottom half. Finding ways to make your top half look proportionate to your bottom half, by making your waist appear longer, helps you achieve balance.

✓ Try a top with vertical lines. These lines give the illusion that your top half is longer than it is. The stripes can be as subtle as a pinstripe blouse — anything that keeps the eye moving up and down right over your waist works.

✓ Wear tops that you can leave untucked. This is another way of hiding where your waist actually is.

A deep V-neck draws the focus upwards and away from your waist (this is a little tip that works for everyone — not just short-waisted women).

✓ Avoid dresses with a waistband. If you do need a belt, choose a narrow one that’s in the same color as your outfit to minimize the attention to the waist area.

✓ If you wear prints, limit it to your top and make sure your top ends by your hips. This hides your true waistline, and the break between the pattern and the solid bottom make your waist seem longer than it really is.

What you don’t want to do is draw attention directly to your middle, as the left-hand model in Figure 3-7 does. The wide belt at the waist accentuates the short waist, making the top half look out of proportion with the bottom half. The tunic top, on the other hand (also in Figure 3-7), elongates the waistline and makes the body look balanced.

Figure 3-7: A don’t (left) and a do (right) for short-waisted women.

Long-waisted women

The problem that long-waisted women have is that their body type makes their legs seem shorter. If you’re a long-waisted woman, you need to use your clothes to add length to your bottom half:

✓ Choose dresses that have an A-line or an empire waist. These styles make your waist appear higher than it is, thus making your legs appear longer too.

✓ Choose shirts that cover your waist. The short, stomach-baring shirts are a problem for long-waisted women. When these types of shirts were the trend, it became difficult for long-waisted women to find tops that didn’t look like they’d shrunk in the dryer. (By the way, anyone over the age of 12 should avoid this trend at all costs. No adult women should ever wear stomach-bearing tops. And, no, it doesn’t matter if you spend every day at the gym!)

✓ Choose pants that are at your natural waistline or a bit above. You definitely want to avoid hip huggers because they make your legs look even shorter.

Never feel as though you’re not “in” if you aren’t wearing what are supposedly the current trends. Even the fashion industry makes mistakes. You don’t have to follow its lead! As I’ve mentioned before, don’t let a trend dictate what you wear. Not all trends work with all body types, and you don’t want to be a fashion victim. Better to stick with your own style and wear clothes that flatter you.

✓ Opt for short jackets. The bolero style, for example, can be very elegant on a long-waisted woman.

✓ Wear heels. They add length to your legs.

✓ To heighten the effect of longer legs, make sure your shoes match your bottom. If you’re wearing a skirt or dress, matching hosiery also adds to that effect, as does a wide belt that matches the color of your bottom.

Whatever you do, avoid styles and cuts that make your legs look shorter (see Figure 3-8). Low-waisted jeans with a shorter top only accentuate your long waist, cut you in the middle, and make your legs look shorter. High-waisted pants, on the other hand, will elongate your legs, and raise the appearance of your natural waistline (also in Figure 3-8).

Figure 3-8: A don’t (left) and a do (right) for long-waisted women.

Tackling other problem areas

The preceding sections concentrate on the waist and hips because those are the most common problem areas, but there are others as well:

✓ Full arms: If your arms are very full, try wearing tops that extend the shoulder, such as a drop shoulder. Adding a colorful shawl in cooler months can also work well. And, of course, tops with lots of fabric in the sleeve can also disguise what’s underneath.

✓ Long necks: If you don’t like your neck because you feel it’s too long, use scarves, turtle necks, cowls, or high collars to make it appear less elongated.

✓ Short necks: For a short neck, you want to expand the neck area by making it seem that the area just below the neck appears to be a part of it. For that, keep your neckline open by unbuttoning a top button or wearing V-necks.

✓ Too-large or too-small chest: If you want to make your chest area seem smaller than it is, a fuller top deemphasizes what’s underneath. You can also wear darker, solid tops with a higher neckline. These minimize the look of the bust area and make it appear smaller. If you have small breasts and want them to appear larger, try wearing tops in lighter colors or with prints. These draw attention to your bust and also make it appear bigger, as do V-necks, sweetheart necks, or any neckline that shows off the bust area. And a very colorful scarf tied in a knot at chest level draws the eye there and accentuates the bust as well.

Remember these two general principles: Cover problem areas with some creative fashion sense, and highlight the other parts of your body that you find attractive to draw the eye there.

Getting Your Size Right

Clothing is available for all body types. Whether you’re buying pieces from the general misses collections, the petites department, or the plus-size department, make sure your clothing fits you properly.

Clothing sizes are never exact because no two people have the exact same measurements. In many instances, the compromises that you have to make to wear “your” size are not that noticeable. Other times, you really must have your clothing altered to get the right fit. If you can find a manufacturer whose size is really close to yours, buy whatever you need and like from that designer’s line.

Petites

Regular misses clothing is designed to fit a woman who is 5 feet 5 inches. If you’re significantly shorter than that, even if some measurements like your waist or bust match a particular regular size, many others like sleeve length or inseam won’t. So women on the shorter side need to shop in the petite section in order to get the best fit.

As you’d expect, if you’re shorter than average, your goal for your wardrobe is to make yourself seem as long as possible. So petites should wear clothes that don’t cut them off in the middle but rather offer the eye the longest possible line.

✓ Clothing that offers vertical lines such as stripes or is monochromatic (or has colors in the same family) are your best bet. If you wear patterns, make sure that they’re smaller (larger patterns can overwhelm you). Stay away from opposites, such as a stark white shirt and black pants. These color combos cut you in the middle. If you want to wear contrasting colors, make sure that the overall look remains vertical so you maintain a longer appearance. For example, go ahead and wear a red blouse with a charcoal gray skirt, but make sure that you also have a matching charcoal jacket.

✓ As a petite, you want to avoid horizontal lines. Wide belts or sashes shouldn’t be a part of your wardrobe, unless they’re the identical color of your outfit.

✓ Detailing can also be useful. A long skirt with a line of buttons down the side adds length to the eye. A wrap dress with an edge that stands out, for example one made of satin, offers a long diagonal line, which has much the same effect as a vertical line.

✓ Need I mention heels? Shoes are most women’s favorite accessory, not to mention biggest weak spot when shopping! Women always make an excuse to buy more shoes. Well, petite women, as long as you can walk in them, break out the high heels! They’ll give you a couple extra inches and, in most cases, give your confidence a boost, too.

Figure 3-9: A pinstripe top is a good choice for a petite woman.

Figure 3-9 shows an outfit that makes a petite woman look taller because of the pinstripes and because the color scheme is the same from top to bottom.

The taller woman

Many tall women likely didn’t love their height growing up. (It’s never easy being the tallest girl in the class!) But get older and being tall is likely easier. Now it’s just about finding clothing that flatters your long body!

Unless you’re over 6 feet tall or have some real figure flaws that you’re trying to hide (refer to the earlier section “The fruit basket: Determining your shape”), you’ll have an easy time shopping and finding clothing that works and looks great on your body. Most models and fit models (models designers use to size their clothing) are on the taller side, and so most designers cut according to those models.

The Baby Phat line of clothing is designed by Kimora Lee Simmons who is 6 feet tall, and tall women report that she has adapted her line to suit taller women, so you may want to check out her clothing line. You can find Baby Phat designs at Macy’s as well as online at www.babyphat.com.

If, for some reason, you’re uncomfortable with your height and want to draw attention away from it, your goal should be to differentiate your top half from the bottom to keep the eyes from seeing you as one long, lean line. To accomplish this, you can use horizontal stripes or a wide belt. Both keep eyes from looking you up and down. Another way to accomplish this is to wear different colors on your top and bottom halves. Black and white does this well, as do any two contrasting colors. A taller woman can also use larger accessories, like a large bag and chunky jewelry. If your accessories are eye-catching and/or in bright colors, they attract all the attention. Figure 3-10 demonstrates how you can wear a contrasting black belt to cut the body in half and make it appear shorter.

If you’re really trying to appear shorter, flat shoes (obviously) help. Tons of cute flats are out there these days, from boots to ballet flats to sandals to flip-flops. The variety is endless and a very welcome addition to most tall women’s wardrobes!

Figure 3-10: Tall women look great in contrasting colors and flats.

Plus sizes

If a size 14 in misses clothing is too small for you, you fall into the plus-size category. You’ll have a larger variety to choose from and a much easier time finding clothing that fits properly and works on your body type if you shop in the plus-size department.

As a plus-size woman, you’re still a fruit (lucky you!) and need to follow the rules that fit your body shape (head to the earlier section “The fruit basket: Determining your shape” to get the appropriate tips).

In addition to the fruit tips, as a plus-size woman, you’re going to look better in solids or small patterns because with so much extra material, any larger pattern is going to make too strong an impact. If you wear plus sizes, a monochromatic look will help elongate your appearance, as Figure 3-11 shows. Of course, while muted colors are going to blend in more, don’t be afraid of color. If the clothing fits right, is flattering, and accentuates your better attributes, go for it. Bright accessories and statement jewelry are also a great way to make any basic outfit pop.

Since a little added height also makes you look more proportioned, wearing heels is a good idea, especially when you dress up. If you’re showing your legs and wearing hosiery, don’t wear hose with patterns or bright colors, how- ever, because that makes your legs look larger. Better to stick with dark tights or flesh-colored hose.

Depending on your exact shape, low-rise pants may be good for you because they don’t squeeze you around the middle (assuming that’s your widest part). You want to avoid wide belts because they draw the eye to your waist. When you wear a belt, choose one that matches the color of your top or bottom. Doing so deemphasizes your waistline.

Figure 3-11: A monochromatic look.

If you haven’t done so already, try out Spanx (head to Chapter 14 for these and other undergarments). Spanx are made to hold you in basically wherever you need a little help! They should become your best friend whether you’re a size 2 or 20!

If you’re plus-size and constantly choose loose dresses because you think they hide what you’re insecure about underneath, stop! Loose dresses with an abundance of material make you look even bigger (see Figure 3-12). They also make you look like you don’t have any shape at all and do nothing to accentuate the attributes you should be showing off.

Just because you’re plus-size doesn’t mean you need to be wearing mu-mus. Make an effort to find clothing that flatters your body. Every woman has beautiful parts and those should be accentuated, not hidden under a tent. Along those same lines, be careful that your clothing is not too tight. Avoid materials that cling to your body, like spandex.

Evens and Odds: Understanding Clothes Sizing

In most settings, two is twice as big as one, but not in women’s clothing. In the past, most women either made their own clothes or had them custom-made, so there was no need for standardized sizes. But once most women started buying their clothes ready-made, a system of standardization was required. In the early 1950s, the National Bureau of Standards, a government agency, was called in to study the situation. An Acting Secretary of the Subcommittee on Body Measurements for Wearing Apparel Sizes was appointed and various engineers and mathematicians were brought on board. After three years of hard work, the standards were set.

Figure 3-12: Don’t choose anything that resembles a mu-mu.

The operative word in the preceding sentence is “were.” Even though the federal government spent three years working to figure out standard sizes for clothing, this relatively easy-to-understand system didn’t last long because women started to grow larger. In order to please women who didn’t want to have to say they were buying sizes that were at the higher end of the scale, the fashion industry introduced vanity sizing, which effectively moved every size down by four notches, so what was once a size 10 became a size 6. In 1983, the government threw up its hands and got out of the sizing business altogether, and so sizes today are a bit of a free-for-all. Because the government doesn’t dictate standard sizes anymore, you can’t always be confident that what a label reads on one garment will be at all similar to another. In other words, a size 8 made by one manufacturer does not necessarily fit the same way a size 8 from another manufacturer does.

Today the only vestige of the old standard sizes can be found in patterns, which have steadfastly retained the old sizing formula.

Nowadays clothing manufacturers have developed their own systems and the result can be a bit confusing. Consider these examples:

✓ Junior clothing includes only odd numbers, 0–13. The fit is more youthful, which generally means smaller and younger in style. If you’re past your teenage years, you should generally not be buying junior clothing. It most likely won’t fit properly and is not really age appropriate.

✓ Women’s clothing (often called “misses”) runs from sizes 0 to 14, even numbers only. These sizes are for most women, unless you’re petite, plus-size, or still young enough to wear junior sizes. These garments are cut with the assumption that women have fuller figures, taking into account the bust and hips.

✓ Plus-size clothing in most clothing lines is anything above a size 14. However, there have been recent changes made with women’s or misses clothing. Now you can find some misses clothing up to a size 20. A true plus size will be designated, say, 18W. The difference is that the plus size is cut larger in the bust and middle.

So what does all this mean to you? If you understand that the size indication on a garment is only a rough guideline, you’ll be much more careful to try on every item you buy before you make the purchase so that you won’t have drawers filled with clothing that doesn’t fit properly.

The Beauty of Altering

Just because you’re a size 6 and the label on the dress in your hand says “Size 6” doesn’t mean that dress is going to fit you. Instead of getting frustrated by this, find yourself an expert tailor. Yes, it’s going to force you to spend some of the money you normally would on buying clothes on getting the ones you have fixed, but you’ll end up with a wardrobe filled with clothes that fit you like a glove. Believe me, you can do more with a closet full of clothing made up of all 10s than you could with a lot of 5s laying around.

Here’s the situation with getting things altered: Do it when it makes sense. If you find the perfect dress in a size 14 but are yourself a size 2, you shouldn’t take the dress to the tailor to make it fit. But if you find a perfect dress that just needs to be a little shorter, or the waist needs to be taken in, or the arms are too long, the tailor should be your next stop.

A great fit is nearly priceless. So if the clothing is really worth it — it looks great and makes you feel great — invest the money to have it tailored properly. If it doesn’t fit properly, you can bet it’s not a 10 (refer to Chapter 2), and it shouldn’t be in your closet, let alone on your body!

Finding someone schooled in the art of altering clothes can be difficult. Here are some suggestions:

✓ Department stores often have tailors on the spot who can measure you and do the necessary work. If this is an option, grab it. The department stores know the tailors’ work well and use them time and again. You’re pretty much guaranteed quality workmanship.

✓ Dry cleaners are often a good source, either because they have a tailor in house or know of someone. If you need something like a simple hem, the dry cleaner is a safe bet. If the alteration is more complicated, con- sider an alteration shop.

✓ Alteration shops specialize in alterations and should be able to do what you require.

A referral from someone who has used a good tailor is always your best bet. The last thing you want is to experiment with a new tailor if you have a complicated alteration or the garment was very expensive. You may want to have two people, one who is less expensive and you can trust to do little jobs (like the hem on a pair of pants) and another who specializes in dressy dresses and more complicated items.

Not so long ago, most women could sew a simple hem. (I can’t, so don’t feel badly if you can’t either.) That was because pants only came in one long length and so they all had to be hemmed to the proper length. Then manufacturers started selling pants, especially jeans, in a multiple of inseam lengths and the concept of having clothes altered started to fade, especially as sewing machines became less and less common a household appliance. (If you don’t own a sewing machine or are laughing at the notion of it, you’re not the only one!)

Impression Management: Developing Your Personal Style

In This Chapter

▶ Knowing what your clothing says about you

▶ Finding your fashion identity and defining your style

▶ Streamlining your closet

▶ Shopping for your new style

What you wear reveals so much about you. That’s why choosing what to put on every day can be so hard. If the clothes you put on reflect your personality, then every day you’re making choices that show the world a little something about yourself. These choices can actually affect how you go about the rest of the day. So when you get dressed every morning, you’re revealing how you feel, showing an aspect of your personality, and preparing your- self for what type of day it’s going to be. (Amazing, right? Did you realize that old sweater you put on last week may have been the cause for your chaotic day?)

In this chapter, you discover how to create and manage your own personal style so that you always leave the house feeling fabulous! And please don’t look at this as some massive project. This aspect of your life is in your control and is very easy to manage. You are steps away from walking out the door every day with a new, confident look — so get ready!

What You Wear: The Key to Confidence and a Window to Your Personality

You can find many definitions of what it means to “be fashionable.” When I talk about a personal style, I don’t mean that your clothes need to reflect what the latest issue of Vogue shows, What I mean is that your clothing should reflect you and your personality. Here’s why:

✓ How you look on the outside reflects how you feel on the inside. Are you full of confidence or more the shy type, raring to go or in need of a nap, ready to meet any challenge or looking for any excuse to dive under your desk?

✓ How you look affects your attitude, your decisions, and often what plans you choose to make (or, more importantly, not make). You never know what the day is going to bring, so you should be pre- pared for all situations (within reason). If you leave the house in the morning looking so-so, you’re less inclined to accept that spontaneous invitation for drinks or dinner after work. You don’t always have to be dressed up in cocktail attire, but if you look great and are confident in your outfit (even if it isn’t as dressy as you’d like), you’ll be more inclined to accept the invitation.

✓ The way you look and feel about yourself influences your confidence. One of the sexiest things a woman can own is her confidence. You want to look fabulous at all times because, let’s face it, you should always look like the fabulous person you are! Confidence is your best accessory (see Figure 2-1). When you walk into a place thinking, “I look smashing!” others will think the same thing. Trust me.

Figure 2-1: Looking and feeling your best boosts your confidence.

This chapter (and this book, for that matter) is all about empowering you. And the first step in grabbing some of that power is recognizing that your appearance is very much in your hands to mold; you have complete control over it. If you believe you’re not good at selecting your clothing and the process isn’t any fun, you probably haven’t yet figured out the right way to do it for you.

What to Aim for When Creating Your Own Personal Style

Personal style is about finding a look that best expresses your personality. It’s also about coordinating looks and really accentuating your physical attributes while camouflaging the areas that need a little help. In fact, your personal style is something that is going to carry you through your adult life. Yes, it may change a bit over time. And yes, it will and should incorporate some of the latest trends, but it’s not about blindly following what appears in the pages of the latest fashion magazines.

A key to creating your own style is knowing the difference between fashion and style. Fashion is what is current and in the moment according to magazines and top designers. Style is something you develop according to your personality and body type. So while miniskirts and knee-high boots may be the latest fashion, they may not be appropriate for you because of your body type, personality, or both. That doesn’t mean you have to abandon them entirely. You can incorporate parts of a particular look into your own style. If a mini- skirt is the wrong length for you, try a pencil skirt that comes to your knee.

If skirts aren’t in your repertoire at all, try a pair of boots under some great- fitting slacks. If the current boot has a pointy toe, wear one in that style and you’ll be incorporating the latest trend in a way that works with your style.

Accentuating your personality

You can shape your personal style in many ways. The choice of what distinguishes your personal style from somebody else’s, such as a specific color or chunky jewelry or stiletto heels, should be one that suits your personality. If you love to be the topic of conversation at a cocktail party, investing in statement jewelry may be the way to go. Many women feel sexier in heels, so maybe topping off each outfit you wear with an unbelievable pair of pumps or sandals is your style. (You get the drift, right?)

Feeling comfortable whenever you head out the door gives you added confidence. And this part of the puzzle is a lot of fun. It really allows you to play with accessories, shoes, scarves, and bags. Plus, it gives you the freedom to buy and wear things that are unique to you!

Using clothing to complement your personality

It’s great to experiment to see how you can bring out other facets of your personality. You’ll be surprised how a different look can make you feel. Consider these examples:

✓ If you aren’t used to being the center of attention and tend to dress in darker or more subdued colors, try something a bit bolder. If putting on a red dress is too much at first, start with a big accessory to brighten up your outfit or try a red top with jeans to ease into dressing in brighter colors. Play around with different combinations to discover which ones you feel comfortable in. Maybe you’ll decide to dress up an otherwise plain outfit with a pink scarf. That scarf will show the world that you were careful about what you chose to wear, but it won’t do it in such an obvious way.

✓ If you love being the center of attention and are always wearing showy or ornate pieces, you may want to try toning your look down from time to time.

✓ If you have a fabulous figure (good for you!) and love to show it off, try a more subtle approach occasionally, which is also very sexy. (It may sound cliché, but less really is more.) Having a little mystery in the mix is always good.

You have to feel comfortable in the clothing that you wear. Your style is a reflection of your personality. While experimenting is great, especially when you’re developing your style, being confident and expressing your true self is the most important thing. Find out what works for you and your body type and develop your wardrobe around that.

Using clothing to project the image you want

In creating your style, you not only want to reflect who you are, but you also have to be focused on the image you want to project. While you should

always stay within your comfort zone, it’s okay to push the envelope a bit. For example, if you’re very conservative and are looking to dress a tad sexier but you’re not sure how to do it, take baby steps. Instead of wearing your little black dress with pumps and pearls, try a stiletto heel and a great pair of chandelier earrings. This takes your look from simple to sizzling with just a couple of changes, while staying within what’s comfortable for you.

Showing you’re in control

One of the great cries of women everywhere is, “I don’t know what to wear!” Now it’s one thing to say that in the privacy of your own home, but when you walk out the door, you don’t want anyone else wondering, “What was she thinking!?” You want to have control over your wardrobe and, more importantly, give the impression you have that control (even if you were in total panic five minutes before leaving the house). It’s all about looking put together as opposed to looking thrown together!

Keep in mind that looking put together doesn’t mean that everything you have on matches perfectly. To be honest, women who wear everything matchy matchy look more like fashion victims than mavens. The idea is to create an overall image that makes those looking at you think you were in complete control when you selected your outfit.

Only one item you’re wearing should pop. If you choose a patterned blouse, keep the rest of the outfit simple (see Figure 2-2). If you have an intricate necklace with a lot of beading, make that necklace the center of attention and go with one color when choosing the rest of the outfit (see Figure 2-3). This rule definitely has exceptions, but it serves as a great jumping-off point.

Figure 2-2: Pick one item to pop in your outfit.

Yes, you can break these rules, if you know what you’re doing. Mixing and matching patterns is definitely possible, but the key is that one or both arevery subtle and the color scheme must match. For example, you can wear a pinstripe pantsuit with a floral blouse. If the pinstripe is subtle, the blouse can take more of center stage (for more on matching patterns and colors, see Chapters 4 and 5). As long as the colors in the suit and the blouse are in the same family, or one is totally neutral, you’re good to go. Before you mix patterns, be confident you know what you’re doing. If you’re not sure, keep it simple and pair either pattern with a solid.

Reflecting different moods

To reflect every possible mood, you need the clothes to do that. When you go shopping, think about how a particular item of clothing or accessory can help you expand your ability to express yourself. If everything you own is very loud, how are you going to dress when you’re in a quieter mood? Or if everything you own is very subdued, you don’t have the option of really dressing up if you’re invited to a great party.

I’m not saying that if you love wearing all black, you need to ditch your entire ward- robe. What I am saying is that if black is your choice of color, make sure you have accessories, shoes, or bags that make your outfit pop when an event calls for it. Different colors make you feel different ways, so keep your options open!

Figure 2-3: Let your accessory be the focal point.

I love to wear all white. I think it’s extremely fresh and clean-looking. But white isn’t appropriate for all occasions. I wouldn’t wear all white in the dead of winter to a dinner party. My point? The color you wear (and the part of your personality you want to project) depends on the time and place.

Fitting perfectly — literally and figuratively

Every woman should develop her own personal style and create a wardrobe to express it. Building a style is a gradual process that happens as you find and collect pieces that fit into the big picture. Does that mean you have to look the same all the time? No. It’s okay to have subsets of style. The image you want to project at the office is going to be different than on the tennis court. But you have to remember that you’re projecting an image in both places. If you’re going to have a personal style, those images generally need to be compatible.

With that said, I know how overwhelming and confusing building a wardrobe can be. It may take some time before you have the confidence to walk into a mall or department store and instantly say, “Oh, that fits perfectly in my closet.” Finding items that are a perfect fit (and I mean that in both senses of the word) can be difficult. But look at it this way: Because you have so much to choose from, differentiating yourself from everyone else becomes a little easier, and after all, that’s really your goal.

Defining Your Personal Style

There’s no end to the type and amount of items you can purchase to jazz up your wardrobe. What you choose defines your personal style. So if the items you select are all of the latest fashion, then your style is going to be high fashion. If you choose to wear T-shirts and jeans every day, that too is a style statement. By carefully choosing what you wear every day, you’re projecting an image. The following sections help you get started in developing your own personal style.

Getting familiar with fabrics and styles

To have the confidence you need when buying clothing, you must become familiar with the different fabrics and styles. That way, when you grab an item from the clothing rack, you can be absolutely sure of what you’re buying. (For more information about what to look for, see Chapter 4.)

Keeping up with what’s “in” is also important. Picking up a fashion magazine every month is a great way to stay in the loop. And remember, the ads are just as important as the editorial pieces. Chapter 8 has the details on what to look for, but for now you just need to know that the magazines, as well as what you see celebs wearing on talk shows or the red carpet, can give you a glimpse into what’s hot. Even if you examine only one of these outlets, you’ll be able to pick up the basic trends like the latest hemlines, colors, cuts, and fabrics.

Considering your characteristics

What about you can be part of your personal style? Lots! Your lifestyle, age, profession, attitude, and hobbies all play a part in defining your personal style. Here are some guidelines:

✓ Lifestyle: Are you a single woman living in the big city or the mother of three running an entire household? When you’re on vacation, do you head for Broadway or the beach? The answers describe your lifestyle and, in turn, help define your personal style.

✓ Age: Everyone wants to look younger, right? The desire to knock off a few years is natural, and your wardrobe is one of the ways to do that. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to dress in the latest trends, but do it in an age- appropriate way. Some trends transcend generations. Asymmetrical necklines (see Figure 2-4), for example, were big at the Oscars and Golden Globes in 2009. Celebrities of all ages were wearing one-shoulder dresses as they graced the red carpets. It was just how they were wearing them that was different. Don’t be afraid to get in on the latest trend if it’s something you love. Just make sure you do it in a way that fits your age, personality, and body type.

If you like a current trend but feel it may be too youthful-looking for you, it probably is. This is true of fashions that reveal the most skin and are the most adorned. Use your judgment when trends veer in this direction, and err on the more conservative side.

✓ Profession: If you work in an office, the dress code is likely different than if you work in a store or at a school. Although you have to work within the constraints of your particular industry, you should be able to express your style no matter what the dress code.

✓ Attitude: Whether you’re a free spirit or some-one who’s more conservative, your clothing can reflect your attitude. Use your wardrobe to express yourself.

✓ Hobbies: What you do in your free time determines your look as well. Whether you’re running errands or running on the beach, your outfit reflects your personality and what you like to do.

Figure 2-4: One-shoulder dresses, a trend that can work at any age.

Figuring out your current style

In order to start building your closet properly, take this easy quiz. (Sorry to take you back to the 8th grade, but it’s a necessary first step!)

Pretend you’re a personal stylist who’s been hired to give you advice. Try to look at yourself as an outsider would when answering the following questions. Nobody knows you better than you do, but if you’ve never done a self-examination like this (and you probably haven’t), what you find out may surprise you. Have fun with this, be honest with yourself, and let your true personality answer every question.

Taking a style quiz

What’s your style? Take this quiz and find out! Circle the answers that best describe you:

1) You are most comfortable in

A) long, flowing dresses

B) cable-knit sweaters

C) a bikini

D) the latest trend

E) a white button-down shirt and jeans

F) a fitted sweat suit

2) When not working, you feel most like yourself

A) in a romantic vacation spot

B) on the tennis court in a country club

C) on a beach

D) in a big city

E) at home hosting an intimate dinner party

F) in your SUV with the kids

3) Your accessory of choice is

A) an armful of gold bangles

B) a strand or two of pearls

C) a rash guard

D) the new “it” bag

E) big, round, black “Jackie O” sunglasses

F) a diaper bag

4) The perfect everyday shoe for you is

A) flip-flops

B) loafers

C) barefoot

D) stilettos

E) flats

F) sneakers

5) You tend to wear

A) mostly white

B) lots of navy blue

C) bright colors

D) head-to-toe black

E) anything neutral

F) dark colors

Evaluating your answers

Now that you’ve taken our style quiz, find out who you are and how to define your look. If your answers fall mostly in the A’s, B’s, C’s, or so on, you fall pretty neatly into one of six groups, outlined in the following sections.

Mostly A’s: Group 1 — The bohemian

You are a true bohemian (see Figure 2-5). You love wearing loose-flowing, romantic tops, skirts, and dresses. You tend toward looking casual, yet pretty. Most of your clothes can go from day to night. You look like you just walked off the beach, no matter what time it is, because you have a relaxed, easy vibe about you. Your color palette includes white, off-white, white, and more white, earth tones, brown, and some beachy colors like turquoise and coral.

Figure 2-5: The true bohemian.

Figure 2-6: The prep.

Mostly B’s: Group 2 — The prep

You love to wear your polo shirts. You pair them with crisp pants or shorts, depending on the weather and the activity. You are likely to be seen in shorts at the country club during the day and pants at the evening barbeque. The cable knit sweater is the cornerstone of your wardrobe. Your color palette is navy blue, kelly green, and pink — all paired with crisp white, if not one another. Your wardrobe is also filled with bold prints, such as plaid, madras, and argyle, for when you’re in the mood to be noticed. The prep look (see Figure 2-6) is totally “old school” yet multigenerational and current as well.

Mostly C’s: Group 3 — The surfer chic

If you answered “C” to all or almost all the questions, you are the quint- essential surfer chic (see Figure 2-7). Your number one priority is how big the waves are. You don’t care what’s going on in the real world. Your world is the beach. You spend your mornings and evenings, and all day if possible, at the beach and out on the waves. Your outfit of choice is a bikini and rash guard, with sheep- skin boots (of course). Your color palette is red, yellow, and blue — all paired with sand or off-white. The bright colors are reminiscent of all the beautiful foliage in Hawaii. Plus, they let other surfers know you’re coming when you catch the big wave!

Figure 2-7: The surfer chic.

Figure 2-8: The fashionista.

Mostly D’s: Group 4 — The fashionista

If you answered “D” to all or almost all the questions, welcome to group 4. You’re the ultimate fashionista (see Figure 2-8)! You love the big city. You adore your uniform of all black with stiletto boots, stiletto pumps, or stiletto sandals. You love to dress up, be in all the latest trends, and wear all designer names. You’re never a fashion victim, and even if you can’t afford the high-end designer labels, you look like you do. You know which pieces to spend your money on and how to make the whole look appear expensive. You never miss an issue of Vogue, Elle, or Harper’s Bazaar. Your color palette is black and more black, paired with the color of the moment, which is, of course, “the new black.”

Mostly E’s: Group 5 — The classic

You’re in group 5 if the letter E came up the most, which makes you a total classic (see Figure 2-9). You have an easy way about dress- ing and are always put together and chic. You stick very close to the basics. You can buy your clothes at Gap or on Madison Avenue, or a combination — after all, a classic is a classic. Your wardrobe consists of white button-down shirts, jeans and slacks, the perfect black blazer, the perfect little black dress, and a fabulous trench coat or two. You also have a drawer full of beautiful scarves and a closet full of gorgeous purses. Your color palette is denim, white, and black, with splashes of color here and there in the form of an accessory such as a scarf or purse. Clothing is basically neutral in color. The ultimate example of a classic is, of course, Jackie O.

Mostly F’s: Group 6 — The suburbanite

Figure 2-9: The timeless classic.

Figure 2-10: The suburbanite.

If you answered mostly F’s, you fit comfortably into group 6, the realm of the suburbanite (see Figure 2-10). You have a casual lifestyle outside the big city. You spend most of your time taking care of everyone else, but you manage to squeeze in an exercise class, a trip to the gym, or a run out- side when you can. Errands and shuttling the kids take up a huge portion of your time, so you need to be comfortable, yet still feel stylish. A cute, well-fitting sweat suit is your go-to outfit first thing in the morning, and it generally carries you through all the day’s activities. If an evening activity is on the agenda, a quick change to slacks or jeans and a sweater or nice T-shirt does the trick. Your color palette consists of darker colors like navy, gray, and black. These colors are flattering and slimming and don’t show stains or wear and tear from all your daily activity.

Help! I didn’t have “mostly” anything

If your answers didn’t indicate a definite tendency toward one look or another, it means that you don’t currently dress in any particular style but throw on something generic to fit the activity. If that’s the case, this is an area you can work on. The easiest way to do so is to answer the questions according to how you picture yourself and see your life, rather than what it currently may be.

You don’t want to have too many styles going on at the same time. Of course, as your social settings change or your mood shifts, you want to be able to adapt your style to fit your needs at the time. But while there’s no doubt that you’ll have to massage your style regularly to get it to fit your schedule, you also don’t want to abandon it on a regular basis. Rather than attempting to develop different styles for different occasions, work on finding ways to use your personal style as a common thread in any outfit you put together.

Even if you aren’t entirely categorized by one group or another, picking a style and going with it can make life a lot easier. I’m not saying you can’t delve into other looks when the mood strikes or the occasion arises — but to develop a personal style, you need to narrow it down.

Building Your Stylish Wardrobe

After you have an idea of the direction you want to go in, you can get started searching for the tools — that is, the clothing and accessories — that can help you to meet your goal. Woo-hoo! Time to have some fun. Your closet is about to get a makeover, and so are you! The next section has the details.

Using my 10 System to create the perfect closet

Once you decide on your style direction, it’s time to focus on what you have going on behind those closet doors. Quality, fit, and style are the most important factors when creating your wardrobe. This means everything in your closet should be first-rate, whether it’s a formal gown or sweat pants. So here’s the deal about your closet (and read this sentence over and over again): Everything in it is a 10 — that is, the best — or it’s about to be. If it isn’t a 10, guess where it’s going? Yup! Out the door. Nothing less than a 10 is acceptable. No, not even to just run to the market, walk the dog, or lounge in at home.

In order for your clothing to be considered a 10, it has to pass the following test. And, yes, you must go through your closet piece by piece, trying things on and asking these five questions of every single item. These questions are in no particular order and are all equally important. Be ruthless! This is not a multiple-choice portion of the book. Every criteria in this list needs to be met or the item is out the door like a bad date!

You must be brutally honest with yourself. Sometimes it helps to have a friend with you, someone whose fashion sense you trust (but any really honest friend will do). It makes the whole process a lot more fun, and you can do it for each other, so you both benefit.

What condition is it in?

Before you even try anything on, take a look at each garment and survey its condition. Is it permanently stained? Are there holes beyond repair? Is it stretched out to the point that it no longer fits well? Is the material pilly (does it have those little round nubby things that cling to lots of sweaters in particular)? If you answer yes to any or all of these questions, you don’t even need to try it on. Toss those pieces straight onto the donation pile.

Does it fit?

If it passed the quality control test, the next step is to try it on. Does it fit? And, more importantly, is it flattering? Is it really a 10? Do you feel like a mil- lion bucks when you put it on? If not, it’s outta there.

If you have a blouse that goes perfectly with a particular pair of pants but it happens to be a little tight so that it shows off that bulge around your tummy, then it’s the wrong choice for you. Ditch it! If you feel uncomfortable about its defects, you won’t wear it no matter how well it goes with the pants. Better to get rid of that blouse and avoid feeling conflicted every time you see it than to keep it just because it’s the only blouse you have in that color.

Is it in style?

Is the piece in style? If not, is it more of a classic piece that will always be in style? Or is it a high-quality item that may come back into style? (The latter scenario is rare. Even when things come back into style years later, they’re always a bit different. Remember the shoulder pads in the 1980s? Well, when they tried to bring them back recently, the pads were on a much smaller scale and the whole trend didn’t really take off again, so those pieces weren’t worth keeping anyway.) So, if the piece isn’t a classic and is truly last year’s trend (or even last decade’s trend), out it goes.

Is it relevant to your current life?

How does this garment fit into your life? Is it an old college sweat shirt? Are they your spinning shoes, and you haven’t seen the inside of a gym in years? Is it a sweater set from your younger, more conservative days? Take stock of your day-to-day life and your activities, and then evaluate what you actually need and actually wear. Do you need office clothes, workout clothes, party clothes? It can be all of the above, but if you don’t play tennis anymore or don’t work in an office anymore, or if anything in your life has changed that affects your wardrobe, then you need to be okay with letting these pieces go. Don’t get sentimental about your old suits. If you don’t use them, someone else may be able to. Isn’t that a lot better? And just think about how nice your closet will look with less clutter!

Where to take the things you don’t want

After you know what you’re getting rid of, the next thing is to figure out what to do with the outgoing piles. Here are the options:

✓ Charities: Any number of charities would be more than thrilled to receive the goods you’re unloading, such as homeless shelters, women’s shelters, and other charitable organizations like Dress for Success.

✓ Vintage shops: If it’s truly a vintage piece, designer, and really worth something — just not something that still fits you or your life — you can try selling it to a high-end vintage shop.

✓ Consignment shops: If the item isn’t really vintage or high-end but is in good condition, relatively current, and is a recognizable brand with possibly some resale value, then by all means take it to a consignment shop. You may be able to get some cash for it. Some shops pay you only if or when they sell the items (hence, the name “consignment.”) Other shops pay you upfront for the merchandise.

Nothing feels better than purging all that excess from your closet. You’ll be so happy you did. Just think about all the room you’ll have for all your fabulous new clothes. Plus, you’ll actually be able to see what great pieces you already have and can use to start putting together fashionable outfits.

Do you ever actually wear it?

This is where you really have to be straight with yourself. We all have things in our closet that we’re either “saving” or we just think we may wear some- day in this other life we’re not living. Sometimes, the piece isn’t really your style or color, but you think it’s a nice top and you may find a reason to wear it one day. Trust me, you won’t. If it’s something you put on and then change out of every time before you leave the house, you really don’t feel comfort- able in it, so don’t even bother. Just get rid of it.

If there’s even a question, a maybe, it’s out. Seriously.

Obviously, if your ex-boyfriend gave you a sweat shirt back in high school, you can keep that. Yes, even if it’s full of holes. But there better be a really good story behind any item you choose to keep that isn’t a 10!

In with the new: A-shopping you will go

Dressing in style doesn’t mean that every single item you wear every day has to be brand new. Although some women have the luxury to do that, the vast majority of women don’t have the money, the time, or the storage for all the clothes and accessories needed to accomplish that. Nor do you have to throw out every thing you already own to develop a personal style. Your shopping goal at this point is to add classic-looking basics and pieces that truly express the new look you want. That means you want to begin purchasing any fashion essentials that you’re missing.

The following basic items are the building blocks for every wardrobe. Incorporate them with other pieces to express your personality and style. When you shop for these items, consider your body type and fit when choosing the cut, length, and style that works for you. I explain how to determine what you need for your body type in Chapter 3:

✓ Little black dress (LBD)

✓ Black blazer

✓ Crisp white button-down shirt

✓ Black trousers

✓ Knee-length black skirt

✓ Classic beige trench coat

✓ Black leather bag

✓ Dark denim jeans

✓ Pair of black pumps

✓ White cardigan sweater (to layer)

✓ Black cardigan sweater (to layer)

✓ Set of pearls

✓ Diamond studs (can be cubic if need be — just keep them small)

You may already have some of these items, but are they really high quality? If not, replace them with high-quality items. For these staples, it’s okay to spend a little more. (You can wait for a sale, but keep in mind that some of these items don’t go on sale very often because they’re always in demand.) If you don’t have the money for a new one now, it’s better to wear your old raincoat for another season and buy a really good one next year. Remember, you’re not on a schedule. Building a stylish wardrobe is a gradual process.

These staple garments are the basis of your wardrobe; they have their own style — classic — and that speaks volumes. After you establish your basic wardrobe, you’ll add additional pieces to create your personal style.

As you shop, keep these tips in mind:

✓ Choose clothes that blend in rather than stand out. Creating a style using accessories is easier and less expensive, but for those accessories to shine, you need clothes that frame them, not overwhelm them. So make sure you have enough solids in your wardrobe. Having solids that you can wear over and over is easier on your budget and makes putting outfits together easier, too. You can do this with neutrals, which can be anything in the white, black, gray, or beige family.

✓ Shop online or use the Web if you lack the time to go shopping. If you’re completely frazzled when you hit the mall, then your attitude may stop you from seeing how a particular article of clothing can help you to express yourself. Offsetting this lack of time are all the new ways to shop, especially the Internet. If you can’t get to a store, set aside some time at night when you can surf the Web. Even if you don’t buy anything, you can print out the type of clothes you like. Then when you go to a store, you can follow the decisions you made when you weren’t so stressed out.

✓ Buy things you like. Even if you buy an item at a time, after a while they’ll start to match up. After all, they all suit your taste, and with that common denominator, eventually they’ll mesh. So if you see a blouse that you really love but you feel like you have nothing to go with it, buy it! Trust me, you probably already own something it will go with, or you’ll buy something soon enough that will be its perfect mate! By the way, 99 percent of all the blouses you own will go with jeans, a black pencil skirt, or classic black pants. (Just an FYI for when you say to yourself “I have nothing to wear with this!”)

Getting help from the pros

As you shop for pieces to include in your new stylish wardrobe, asking a salesperson for assistance is often helpful. She’ll know the lay of the land and can direct you straight to what you’re looking for so you can avoid wandering around aimlessly (to later purchase something you don’t need).

When you find a helpful salesperson in one department, let her know which department you’re going to next and ask who you should ask to see. Chances are, she’ll be able to guide you toward another salesperson who “gets” it.

If you think that you’re really clueless and you need more than just a department store salesperson, then you need to find a fashion consultant. A sales- person is limited to the clothes in that store, but an outside professional can steer you toward a variety of stores where you can find what you need.

Hiring a fashion consultant can also be a good first step in the process of deciding what your personal style should be. The two of you can create your style, develop a game plan, and go out shopping. Then, if need be, you can continue to shop on your own or engage the consultant on a regular basis to go on shopping trips — either with you or for you.

For more information on how sales associates, personal shoppers, and fashion consultants can help you, go to Chapter 8.

Impression Management: Developing Your Personal Style

In This Chapter

▶ Knowing what your clothing says about you

▶ Finding your fashion identity and defining your style

▶ Streamlining your closet

▶ Shopping for your new style

What you wear reveals so much about you. That’s why choosing what to put on every day can be so hard. If the clothes you put on reflect your personality, then every day you’re making choices that show the world a little something about yourself. These choices can actually affect how you go about the rest of the day. So when you get dressed every morning, you’re revealing how you feel, showing an aspect of your personality, and preparing your- self for what type of day it’s going to be. (Amazing, right? Did you realize that old sweater you put on last week may have been the cause for your chaotic day?)

In this chapter, you discover how to create and manage your own personal style so that you always leave the house feeling fabulous! And please don’t look at this as some massive project. This aspect of your life is in your control and is very easy to manage. You are steps away from walking out the door every day with a new, confident look — so get ready!

What You Wear: The Key to Confidence and a Window to Your Personality

You can find many definitions of what it means to “be fashionable.” When I talk about a personal style, I don’t mean that your clothes need to reflect what the latest issue of Vogue shows, What I mean is that your clothing should reflect you and your personality. Here’s why:

✓ How you look on the outside reflects how you feel on the inside. Are you full of confidence or more the shy type, raring to go or in need of a nap, ready to meet any challenge or looking for any excuse to dive under your desk?

✓ How you look affects your attitude, your decisions, and often what plans you choose to make (or, more importantly, not make). You never know what the day is going to bring, so you should be pre- pared for all situations (within reason). If you leave the house in the morning looking so-so, you’re less inclined to accept that spontaneous invitation for drinks or dinner after work. You don’t always have to be dressed up in cocktail attire, but if you look great and are confident in your outfit (even if it isn’t as dressy as you’d like), you’ll be more inclined to accept the invitation.

✓ The way you look and feel about yourself influences your confidence. One of the sexiest things a woman can own is her confidence. You want to look fabulous at all times because, let’s face it, you should always look like the fabulous person you are! Confidence is your best accessory (see Figure 2-1). When you walk into a place thinking, “I look smashing!” others will think the same thing. Trust me.

Figure 2-1: Looking and feeling your best boosts your confidence.

This chapter (and this book, for that matter) is all about empowering you. And the first step in grabbing some of that power is recognizing that your appearance is very much in your hands to mold; you have complete control over it. If you believe you’re not good at selecting your clothing and the process isn’t any fun, you probably haven’t yet figured out the right way to do it for you.

What to Aim for When Creating Your Own Personal Style

Personal style is about finding a look that best expresses your personality. It’s also about coordinating looks and really accentuating your physical attributes while camouflaging the areas that need a little help. In fact, your personal style is something that is going to carry you through your adult life. Yes, it may change a bit over time. And yes, it will and should incorporate some of the latest trends, but it’s not about blindly following what appears in the pages of the latest fashion magazines.

A key to creating your own style is knowing the difference between fashion and style. Fashion is what is current and in the moment according to magazines and top designers. Style is something you develop according to your personality and body type. So while miniskirts and knee-high boots may be the latest fashion, they may not be appropriate for you because of your body type, personality, or both. That doesn’t mean you have to abandon them entirely. You can incorporate parts of a particular look into your own style. If a mini- skirt is the wrong length for you, try a pencil skirt that comes to your knee.

If skirts aren’t in your repertoire at all, try a pair of boots under some great- fitting slacks. If the current boot has a pointy toe, wear one in that style and you’ll be incorporating the latest trend in a way that works with your style.

Accentuating your personality

You can shape your personal style in many ways. The choice of what distinguishes your personal style from somebody else’s, such as a specific color or chunky jewelry or stiletto heels, should be one that suits your personality. If you love to be the topic of conversation at a cocktail party, investing in statement jewelry may be the way to go. Many women feel sexier in heels, so maybe topping off each outfit you wear with an unbelievable pair of pumps or sandals is your style. (You get the drift, right?)

Feeling comfortable whenever you head out the door gives you added confidence. And this part of the puzzle is a lot of fun. It really allows you to play with accessories, shoes, scarves, and bags. Plus, it gives you the freedom to buy and wear things that are unique to you!

Using clothing to complement your personality

It’s great to experiment to see how you can bring out other facets of your personality. You’ll be surprised how a different look can make you feel. Consider these examples:

✓ If you aren’t used to being the center of attention and tend to dress in darker or more subdued colors, try something a bit bolder. If putting on a red dress is too much at first, start with a big accessory to brighten up your outfit or try a red top with jeans to ease into dressing in brighter colors. Play around with different combinations to discover which ones you feel comfortable in. Maybe you’ll decide to dress up an otherwise plain outfit with a pink scarf. That scarf will show the world that you were careful about what you chose to wear, but it won’t do it in such an obvious way.

✓ If you love being the center of attention and are always wearing showy or ornate pieces, you may want to try toning your look down from time to time.

✓ If you have a fabulous figure (good for you!) and love to show it off, try a more subtle approach occasionally, which is also very sexy. (It may sound cliché, but less really is more.) Having a little mystery in the mix is always good.

You have to feel comfortable in the clothing that you wear. Your style is a reflection of your personality. While experimenting is great, especially when you’re developing your style, being confident and expressing your true self is the most important thing. Find out what works for you and your body type and develop your wardrobe around that.

Using clothing to project the image you want

In creating your style, you not only want to reflect who you are, but you also have to be focused on the image you want to project. While you should

always stay within your comfort zone, it’s okay to push the envelope a bit. For example, if you’re very conservative and are looking to dress a tad sexier but you’re not sure how to do it, take baby steps. Instead of wearing your little black dress with pumps and pearls, try a stiletto heel and a great pair of chandelier earrings. This takes your look from simple to sizzling with just a couple of changes, while staying within what’s comfortable for you.

Showing you’re in control

One of the great cries of women everywhere is, “I don’t know what to wear!” Now it’s one thing to say that in the privacy of your own home, but when you walk out the door, you don’t want anyone else wondering, “What was she thinking!?” You want to have control over your wardrobe and, more importantly, give the impression you have that control (even if you were in total panic five minutes before leaving the house). It’s all about looking put together as opposed to looking thrown together!

Keep in mind that looking put together doesn’t mean that everything you have on matches perfectly. To be honest, women who wear everything matchy matchy look more like fashion victims than mavens. The idea is to create an overall image that makes those looking at you think you were in complete control when you selected your outfit.

Only one item you’re wearing should pop. If you choose a patterned blouse, keep the rest of the outfit simple (see Figure 2-2). If you have an intricate necklace with a lot of beading, make that necklace the center of attention and go with one color when choosing the rest of the outfit (see Figure 2-3). This rule definitely has exceptions, but it serves as a great jumping-off point.

Figure 2-2: Pick one item to pop in your outfit.

Yes, you can break these rules, if you know what you’re doing. Mixing and matching patterns is definitely possible, but the key is that one or both arevery subtle and the color scheme must match. For example, you can wear a pinstripe pantsuit with a floral blouse. If the pinstripe is subtle, the blouse can take more of center stage (for more on matching patterns and colors, see Chapters 4 and 5). As long as the colors in the suit and the blouse are in the same family, or one is totally neutral, you’re good to go. Before you mix patterns, be confident you know what you’re doing. If you’re not sure, keep it simple and pair either pattern with a solid.

Reflecting different moods

To reflect every possible mood, you need the clothes to do that. When you go shopping, think about how a particular item of clothing or accessory can help you expand your ability to express yourself. If everything you own is very loud, how are you going to dress when you’re in a quieter mood? Or if everything you own is very subdued, you don’t have the option of really dressing up if you’re invited to a great party.

I’m not saying that if you love wearing all black, you need to ditch your entire ward- robe. What I am saying is that if black is your choice of color, make sure you have accessories, shoes, or bags that make your outfit pop when an event calls for it. Different colors make you feel different ways, so keep your options open!

Figure 2-3: Let your accessory be the focal point.

I love to wear all white. I think it’s extremely fresh and clean-looking. But white isn’t appropriate for all occasions. I wouldn’t wear all white in the dead of winter to a dinner party. My point? The color you wear (and the part of your personality you want to project) depends on the time and place.

Fitting perfectly — literally and figuratively

Every woman should develop her own personal style and create a wardrobe to express it. Building a style is a gradual process that happens as you find and collect pieces that fit into the big picture. Does that mean you have to look the same all the time? No. It’s okay to have subsets of style. The image you want to project at the office is going to be different than on the tennis court. But you have to remember that you’re projecting an image in both places. If you’re going to have a personal style, those images generally need to be compatible.

With that said, I know how overwhelming and confusing building a wardrobe can be. It may take some time before you have the confidence to walk into a mall or department store and instantly say, “Oh, that fits perfectly in my closet.” Finding items that are a perfect fit (and I mean that in both senses of the word) can be difficult. But look at it this way: Because you have so much to choose from, differentiating yourself from everyone else becomes a little easier, and after all, that’s really your goal.

Defining Your Personal Style

There’s no end to the type and amount of items you can purchase to jazz up your wardrobe. What you choose defines your personal style. So if the items you select are all of the latest fashion, then your style is going to be high fashion. If you choose to wear T-shirts and jeans every day, that too is a style statement. By carefully choosing what you wear every day, you’re projecting an image. The following sections help you get started in developing your own personal style.

Getting familiar with fabrics and styles

To have the confidence you need when buying clothing, you must become familiar with the different fabrics and styles. That way, when you grab an item from the clothing rack, you can be absolutely sure of what you’re buying. (For more information about what to look for, see Chapter 4.)

Keeping up with what’s “in” is also important. Picking up a fashion magazine every month is a great way to stay in the loop. And remember, the ads are just as important as the editorial pieces. Chapter 8 has the details on what to look for, but for now you just need to know that the magazines, as well as what you see celebs wearing on talk shows or the red carpet, can give you a glimpse into what’s hot. Even if you examine only one of these outlets, you’ll be able to pick up the basic trends like the latest hemlines, colors, cuts, and fabrics.

Considering your characteristics

What about you can be part of your personal style? Lots! Your lifestyle, age, profession, attitude, and hobbies all play a part in defining your personal style. Here are some guidelines:

✓ Lifestyle: Are you a single woman living in the big city or the mother of three running an entire household? When you’re on vacation, do you head for Broadway or the beach? The answers describe your lifestyle and, in turn, help define your personal style.

✓ Age: Everyone wants to look younger, right? The desire to knock off a few years is natural, and your wardrobe is one of the ways to do that. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to dress in the latest trends, but do it in an age- appropriate way. Some trends transcend generations. Asymmetrical necklines (see Figure 2-4), for example, were big at the Oscars and Golden Globes in 2009. Celebrities of all ages were wearing one-shoulder dresses as they graced the red carpets. It was just how they were wearing them that was different. Don’t be afraid to get in on the latest trend if it’s something you love. Just make sure you do it in a way that fits your age, personality, and body type.

If you like a current trend but feel it may be too youthful-looking for you, it probably is. This is true of fashions that reveal the most skin and are the most adorned. Use your judgment when trends veer in this direction, and err on the more conservative side.

✓ Profession: If you work in an office, the dress code is likely different than if you work in a store or at a school. Although you have to work within the constraints of your particular industry, you should be able to express your style no matter what the dress code.

✓ Attitude: Whether you’re a free spirit or some-one who’s more conservative, your clothing can reflect your attitude. Use your wardrobe to express yourself.

✓ Hobbies: What you do in your free time determines your look as well. Whether you’re running errands or running on the beach, your outfit reflects your personality and what you like to do.

Figure 2-4: One-shoulder dresses, a trend that can work at any age.

Figuring out your current style

In order to start building your closet properly, take this easy quiz. (Sorry to take you back to the 8th grade, but it’s a necessary first step!)

Pretend you’re a personal stylist who’s been hired to give you advice. Try to look at yourself as an outsider would when answering the following questions. Nobody knows you better than you do, but if you’ve never done a self-examination like this (and you probably haven’t), what you find out may surprise you. Have fun with this, be honest with yourself, and let your true personality answer every question.

Taking a style quiz

What’s your style? Take this quiz and find out! Circle the answers that best describe you:

1) You are most comfortable in

A) long, flowing dresses

B) cable-knit sweaters

C) a bikini

D) the latest trend

E) a white button-down shirt and jeans

F) a fitted sweat suit

2) When not working, you feel most like yourself

A) in a romantic vacation spot

B) on the tennis court in a country club

C) on a beach

D) in a big city

E) at home hosting an intimate dinner party

F) in your SUV with the kids

3) Your accessory of choice is

A) an armful of gold bangles

B) a strand or two of pearls

C) a rash guard

D) the new “it” bag

E) big, round, black “Jackie O” sunglasses

F) a diaper bag

4) The perfect everyday shoe for you is

A) flip-flops

B) loafers

C) barefoot

D) stilettos

E) flats

F) sneakers

5) You tend to wear

A) mostly white

B) lots of navy blue

C) bright colors

D) head-to-toe black

E) anything neutral

F) dark colors

Evaluating your answers

Now that you’ve taken our style quiz, find out who you are and how to define your look. If your answers fall mostly in the A’s, B’s, C’s, or so on, you fall pretty neatly into one of six groups, outlined in the following sections.

Mostly A’s: Group 1 — The bohemian

You are a true bohemian (see Figure 2-5). You love wearing loose-flowing, romantic tops, skirts, and dresses. You tend toward looking casual, yet pretty. Most of your clothes can go from day to night. You look like you just walked off the beach, no matter what time it is, because you have a relaxed, easy vibe about you. Your color palette includes white, off-white, white, and more white, earth tones, brown, and some beachy colors like turquoise and coral.

Figure 2-5: The true bohemian.

Figure 2-6: The prep.

Mostly B’s: Group 2 — The prep

You love to wear your polo shirts. You pair them with crisp pants or shorts, depending on the weather and the activity. You are likely to be seen in shorts at the country club during the day and pants at the evening barbeque. The cable knit sweater is the cornerstone of your wardrobe. Your color palette is navy blue, kelly green, and pink — all paired with crisp white, if not one another. Your wardrobe is also filled with bold prints, such as plaid, madras, and argyle, for when you’re in the mood to be noticed. The prep look (see Figure 2-6) is totally “old school” yet multigenerational and current as well.

Mostly C’s: Group 3 — The surfer chic

If you answered “C” to all or almost all the questions, you are the quint- essential surfer chic (see Figure 2-7). Your number one priority is how big the waves are. You don’t care what’s going on in the real world. Your world is the beach. You spend your mornings and evenings, and all day if possible, at the beach and out on the waves. Your outfit of choice is a bikini and rash guard, with sheep- skin boots (of course). Your color palette is red, yellow, and blue — all paired with sand or off-white. The bright colors are reminiscent of all the beautiful foliage in Hawaii. Plus, they let other surfers know you’re coming when you catch the big wave!

Figure 2-7: The surfer chic.

Figure 2-8: The fashionista.

Mostly D’s: Group 4 — The fashionista

If you answered “D” to all or almost all the questions, welcome to group 4. You’re the ultimate fashionista (see Figure 2-8)! You love the big city. You adore your uniform of all black with stiletto boots, stiletto pumps, or stiletto sandals. You love to dress up, be in all the latest trends, and wear all designer names. You’re never a fashion victim, and even if you can’t afford the high-end designer labels, you look like you do. You know which pieces to spend your money on and how to make the whole look appear expensive. You never miss an issue of Vogue, Elle, or Harper’s Bazaar. Your color palette is black and more black, paired with the color of the moment, which is, of course, “the new black.”

Mostly E’s: Group 5 — The classic

You’re in group 5 if the letter E came up the most, which makes you a total classic (see Figure 2-9). You have an easy way about dress- ing and are always put together and chic. You stick very close to the basics. You can buy your clothes at Gap or on Madison Avenue, or a combination — after all, a classic is a classic. Your wardrobe consists of white button-down shirts, jeans and slacks, the perfect black blazer, the perfect little black dress, and a fabulous trench coat or two. You also have a drawer full of beautiful scarves and a closet full of gorgeous purses. Your color palette is denim, white, and black, with splashes of color here and there in the form of an accessory such as a scarf or purse. Clothing is basically neutral in color. The ultimate example of a classic is, of course, Jackie O.

Mostly F’s: Group 6 — The suburbanite

Figure 2-9: The timeless classic.

Figure 2-10: The suburbanite.

If you answered mostly F’s, you fit comfortably into group 6, the realm of the suburbanite (see Figure 2-10). You have a casual lifestyle outside the big city. You spend most of your time taking care of everyone else, but you manage to squeeze in an exercise class, a trip to the gym, or a run out- side when you can. Errands and shuttling the kids take up a huge portion of your time, so you need to be comfortable, yet still feel stylish. A cute, well-fitting sweat suit is your go-to outfit first thing in the morning, and it generally carries you through all the day’s activities. If an evening activity is on the agenda, a quick change to slacks or jeans and a sweater or nice T-shirt does the trick. Your color palette consists of darker colors like navy, gray, and black. These colors are flattering and slimming and don’t show stains or wear and tear from all your daily activity.

Help! I didn’t have “mostly” anything

If your answers didn’t indicate a definite tendency toward one look or another, it means that you don’t currently dress in any particular style but throw on something generic to fit the activity. If that’s the case, this is an area you can work on. The easiest way to do so is to answer the questions according to how you picture yourself and see your life, rather than what it currently may be.

You don’t want to have too many styles going on at the same time. Of course, as your social settings change or your mood shifts, you want to be able to adapt your style to fit your needs at the time. But while there’s no doubt that you’ll have to massage your style regularly to get it to fit your schedule, you also don’t want to abandon it on a regular basis. Rather than attempting to develop different styles for different occasions, work on finding ways to use your personal style as a common thread in any outfit you put together.

Even if you aren’t entirely categorized by one group or another, picking a style and going with it can make life a lot easier. I’m not saying you can’t delve into other looks when the mood strikes or the occasion arises — but to develop a personal style, you need to narrow it down.

Building Your Stylish Wardrobe

After you have an idea of the direction you want to go in, you can get started searching for the tools — that is, the clothing and accessories — that can help you to meet your goal. Woo-hoo! Time to have some fun. Your closet is about to get a makeover, and so are you! The next section has the details.

Using my 10 System to create the perfect closet

Once you decide on your style direction, it’s time to focus on what you have going on behind those closet doors. Quality, fit, and style are the most important factors when creating your wardrobe. This means everything in your closet should be first-rate, whether it’s a formal gown or sweat pants. So here’s the deal about your closet (and read this sentence over and over again): Everything in it is a 10 — that is, the best — or it’s about to be. If it isn’t a 10, guess where it’s going? Yup! Out the door. Nothing less than a 10 is acceptable. No, not even to just run to the market, walk the dog, or lounge in at home.

In order for your clothing to be considered a 10, it has to pass the following test. And, yes, you must go through your closet piece by piece, trying things on and asking these five questions of every single item. These questions are in no particular order and are all equally important. Be ruthless! This is not a multiple-choice portion of the book. Every criteria in this list needs to be met or the item is out the door like a bad date!

You must be brutally honest with yourself. Sometimes it helps to have a friend with you, someone whose fashion sense you trust (but any really honest friend will do). It makes the whole process a lot more fun, and you can do it for each other, so you both benefit.

What condition is it in?

Before you even try anything on, take a look at each garment and survey its condition. Is it permanently stained? Are there holes beyond repair? Is it stretched out to the point that it no longer fits well? Is the material pilly (does it have those little round nubby things that cling to lots of sweaters in particular)? If you answer yes to any or all of these questions, you don’t even need to try it on. Toss those pieces straight onto the donation pile.

Does it fit?

If it passed the quality control test, the next step is to try it on. Does it fit? And, more importantly, is it flattering? Is it really a 10? Do you feel like a mil- lion bucks when you put it on? If not, it’s outta there.

If you have a blouse that goes perfectly with a particular pair of pants but it happens to be a little tight so that it shows off that bulge around your tummy, then it’s the wrong choice for you. Ditch it! If you feel uncomfortable about its defects, you won’t wear it no matter how well it goes with the pants. Better to get rid of that blouse and avoid feeling conflicted every time you see it than to keep it just because it’s the only blouse you have in that color.

Is it in style?

Is the piece in style? If not, is it more of a classic piece that will always be in style? Or is it a high-quality item that may come back into style? (The latter scenario is rare. Even when things come back into style years later, they’re always a bit different. Remember the shoulder pads in the 1980s? Well, when they tried to bring them back recently, the pads were on a much smaller scale and the whole trend didn’t really take off again, so those pieces weren’t worth keeping anyway.) So, if the piece isn’t a classic and is truly last year’s trend (or even last decade’s trend), out it goes.

Is it relevant to your current life?

How does this garment fit into your life? Is it an old college sweat shirt? Are they your spinning shoes, and you haven’t seen the inside of a gym in years? Is it a sweater set from your younger, more conservative days? Take stock of your day-to-day life and your activities, and then evaluate what you actually need and actually wear. Do you need office clothes, workout clothes, party clothes? It can be all of the above, but if you don’t play tennis anymore or don’t work in an office anymore, or if anything in your life has changed that affects your wardrobe, then you need to be okay with letting these pieces go. Don’t get sentimental about your old suits. If you don’t use them, someone else may be able to. Isn’t that a lot better? And just think about how nice your closet will look with less clutter!

Where to take the things you don’t want

After you know what you’re getting rid of, the next thing is to figure out what to do with the outgoing piles. Here are the options:

✓ Charities: Any number of charities would be more than thrilled to receive the goods you’re unloading, such as homeless shelters, women’s shelters, and other charitable organizations like Dress for Success.

✓ Vintage shops: If it’s truly a vintage piece, designer, and really worth something — just not something that still fits you or your life — you can try selling it to a high-end vintage shop.

✓ Consignment shops: If the item isn’t really vintage or high-end but is in good condition, relatively current, and is a recognizable brand with possibly some resale value, then by all means take it to a consignment shop. You may be able to get some cash for it. Some shops pay you only if or when they sell the items (hence, the name “consignment.”) Other shops pay you upfront for the merchandise.

Nothing feels better than purging all that excess from your closet. You’ll be so happy you did. Just think about all the room you’ll have for all your fabulous new clothes. Plus, you’ll actually be able to see what great pieces you already have and can use to start putting together fashionable outfits.

Do you ever actually wear it?

This is where you really have to be straight with yourself. We all have things in our closet that we’re either “saving” or we just think we may wear some- day in this other life we’re not living. Sometimes, the piece isn’t really your style or color, but you think it’s a nice top and you may find a reason to wear it one day. Trust me, you won’t. If it’s something you put on and then change out of every time before you leave the house, you really don’t feel comfort- able in it, so don’t even bother. Just get rid of it.

If there’s even a question, a maybe, it’s out. Seriously.

Obviously, if your ex-boyfriend gave you a sweat shirt back in high school, you can keep that. Yes, even if it’s full of holes. But there better be a really good story behind any item you choose to keep that isn’t a 10!

In with the new: A-shopping you will go

Dressing in style doesn’t mean that every single item you wear every day has to be brand new. Although some women have the luxury to do that, the vast majority of women don’t have the money, the time, or the storage for all the clothes and accessories needed to accomplish that. Nor do you have to throw out every thing you already own to develop a personal style. Your shopping goal at this point is to add classic-looking basics and pieces that truly express the new look you want. That means you want to begin purchasing any fashion essentials that you’re missing.

The following basic items are the building blocks for every wardrobe. Incorporate them with other pieces to express your personality and style. When you shop for these items, consider your body type and fit when choosing the cut, length, and style that works for you. I explain how to determine what you need for your body type in Chapter 3:

✓ Little black dress (LBD)

✓ Black blazer

✓ Crisp white button-down shirt

✓ Black trousers

✓ Knee-length black skirt

✓ Classic beige trench coat

✓ Black leather bag

✓ Dark denim jeans

✓ Pair of black pumps

✓ White cardigan sweater (to layer)

✓ Black cardigan sweater (to layer)

✓ Set of pearls

✓ Diamond studs (can be cubic if need be — just keep them small)

You may already have some of these items, but are they really high quality? If not, replace them with high-quality items. For these staples, it’s okay to spend a little more. (You can wait for a sale, but keep in mind that some of these items don’t go on sale very often because they’re always in demand.) If you don’t have the money for a new one now, it’s better to wear your old raincoat for another season and buy a really good one next year. Remember, you’re not on a schedule. Building a stylish wardrobe is a gradual process.

These staple garments are the basis of your wardrobe; they have their own style — classic — and that speaks volumes. After you establish your basic wardrobe, you’ll add additional pieces to create your personal style.

As you shop, keep these tips in mind:

✓ Choose clothes that blend in rather than stand out. Creating a style using accessories is easier and less expensive, but for those accessories to shine, you need clothes that frame them, not overwhelm them. So make sure you have enough solids in your wardrobe. Having solids that you can wear over and over is easier on your budget and makes putting outfits together easier, too. You can do this with neutrals, which can be anything in the white, black, gray, or beige family.

✓ Shop online or use the Web if you lack the time to go shopping. If you’re completely frazzled when you hit the mall, then your attitude may stop you from seeing how a particular article of clothing can help you to express yourself. Offsetting this lack of time are all the new ways to shop, especially the Internet. If you can’t get to a store, set aside some time at night when you can surf the Web. Even if you don’t buy anything, you can print out the type of clothes you like. Then when you go to a store, you can follow the decisions you made when you weren’t so stressed out.

✓ Buy things you like. Even if you buy an item at a time, after a while they’ll start to match up. After all, they all suit your taste, and with that common denominator, eventually they’ll mesh. So if you see a blouse that you really love but you feel like you have nothing to go with it, buy it! Trust me, you probably already own something it will go with, or you’ll buy something soon enough that will be its perfect mate! By the way, 99 percent of all the blouses you own will go with jeans, a black pencil skirt, or classic black pants. (Just an FYI for when you say to yourself “I have nothing to wear with this!”)

Getting help from the pros

As you shop for pieces to include in your new stylish wardrobe, asking a salesperson for assistance is often helpful. She’ll know the lay of the land and can direct you straight to what you’re looking for so you can avoid wandering around aimlessly (to later purchase something you don’t need).

When you find a helpful salesperson in one department, let her know which department you’re going to next and ask who you should ask to see. Chances are, she’ll be able to guide you toward another salesperson who “gets” it.

If you think that you’re really clueless and you need more than just a department store salesperson, then you need to find a fashion consultant. A sales- person is limited to the clothes in that store, but an outside professional can steer you toward a variety of stores where you can find what you need.

Hiring a fashion consultant can also be a good first step in the process of deciding what your personal style should be. The two of you can create your style, develop a game plan, and go out shopping. Then, if need be, you can continue to shop on your own or engage the consultant on a regular basis to go on shopping trips — either with you or for you.

For more information on how sales associates, personal shoppers, and fashion consultants can help you, go to Chapter 8.

Impression Management: Developing Your Personal Style

In This Chapter

▶ Knowing what your clothing says about you

▶ Finding your fashion identity and defining your style

▶ Streamlining your closet

▶ Shopping for your new style

What you wear reveals so much about you. That’s why choosing what to put on every day can be so hard. If the clothes you put on reflect your personality, then every day you’re making choices that show the world a little something about yourself. These choices can actually affect how you go about the rest of the day. So when you get dressed every morning, you’re revealing how you feel, showing an aspect of your personality, and preparing your- self for what type of day it’s going to be. (Amazing, right? Did you realize that old sweater you put on last week may have been the cause for your chaotic day?)

In this chapter, you discover how to create and manage your own personal style so that you always leave the house feeling fabulous! And please don’t look at this as some massive project. This aspect of your life is in your control and is very easy to manage. You are steps away from walking out the door every day with a new, confident look — so get ready!

What You Wear: The Key to Confidence and a Window to Your Personality

You can find many definitions of what it means to “be fashionable.” When I talk about a personal style, I don’t mean that your clothes need to reflect what the latest issue of Vogue shows, What I mean is that your clothing should reflect you and your personality. Here’s why:

✓ How you look on the outside reflects how you feel on the inside. Are you full of confidence or more the shy type, raring to go or in need of a nap, ready to meet any challenge or looking for any excuse to dive under your desk?

✓ How you look affects your attitude, your decisions, and often what plans you choose to make (or, more importantly, not make). You never know what the day is going to bring, so you should be pre- pared for all situations (within reason). If you leave the house in the morning looking so-so, you’re less inclined to accept that spontaneous invitation for drinks or dinner after work. You don’t always have to be dressed up in cocktail attire, but if you look great and are confident in your outfit (even if it isn’t as dressy as you’d like), you’ll be more inclined to accept the invitation.

✓ The way you look and feel about yourself influences your confidence. One of the sexiest things a woman can own is her confidence. You want to look fabulous at all times because, let’s face it, you should always look like the fabulous person you are! Confidence is your best accessory (see Figure 2-1). When you walk into a place thinking, “I look smashing!” others will think the same thing. Trust me.

Figure 2-1: Looking and feeling your best boosts your confidence.

This chapter (and this book, for that matter) is all about empowering you. And the first step in grabbing some of that power is recognizing that your appearance is very much in your hands to mold; you have complete control over it. If you believe you’re not good at selecting your clothing and the process isn’t any fun, you probably haven’t yet figured out the right way to do it for you.

What to Aim for When Creating Your Own Personal Style

Personal style is about finding a look that best expresses your personality. It’s also about coordinating looks and really accentuating your physical attributes while camouflaging the areas that need a little help. In fact, your personal style is something that is going to carry you through your adult life. Yes, it may change a bit over time. And yes, it will and should incorporate some of the latest trends, but it’s not about blindly following what appears in the pages of the latest fashion magazines.

A key to creating your own style is knowing the difference between fashion and style. Fashion is what is current and in the moment according to magazines and top designers. Style is something you develop according to your personality and body type. So while miniskirts and knee-high boots may be the latest fashion, they may not be appropriate for you because of your body type, personality, or both. That doesn’t mean you have to abandon them entirely. You can incorporate parts of a particular look into your own style. If a mini- skirt is the wrong length for you, try a pencil skirt that comes to your knee.

If skirts aren’t in your repertoire at all, try a pair of boots under some great- fitting slacks. If the current boot has a pointy toe, wear one in that style and you’ll be incorporating the latest trend in a way that works with your style.

Accentuating your personality

You can shape your personal style in many ways. The choice of what distinguishes your personal style from somebody else’s, such as a specific color or chunky jewelry or stiletto heels, should be one that suits your personality. If you love to be the topic of conversation at a cocktail party, investing in statement jewelry may be the way to go. Many women feel sexier in heels, so maybe topping off each outfit you wear with an unbelievable pair of pumps or sandals is your style. (You get the drift, right?)

Feeling comfortable whenever you head out the door gives you added confidence. And this part of the puzzle is a lot of fun. It really allows you to play with accessories, shoes, scarves, and bags. Plus, it gives you the freedom to buy and wear things that are unique to you!

Using clothing to complement your personality

It’s great to experiment to see how you can bring out other facets of your personality. You’ll be surprised how a different look can make you feel. Consider these examples:

✓ If you aren’t used to being the center of attention and tend to dress in darker or more subdued colors, try something a bit bolder. If putting on a red dress is too much at first, start with a big accessory to brighten up your outfit or try a red top with jeans to ease into dressing in brighter colors. Play around with different combinations to discover which ones you feel comfortable in. Maybe you’ll decide to dress up an otherwise plain outfit with a pink scarf. That scarf will show the world that you were careful about what you chose to wear, but it won’t do it in such an obvious way.

✓ If you love being the center of attention and are always wearing showy or ornate pieces, you may want to try toning your look down from time to time.

✓ If you have a fabulous figure (good for you!) and love to show it off, try a more subtle approach occasionally, which is also very sexy. (It may sound cliché, but less really is more.) Having a little mystery in the mix is always good.

You have to feel comfortable in the clothing that you wear. Your style is a reflection of your personality. While experimenting is great, especially when you’re developing your style, being confident and expressing your true self is the most important thing. Find out what works for you and your body type and develop your wardrobe around that.

Using clothing to project the image you want

In creating your style, you not only want to reflect who you are, but you also have to be focused on the image you want to project. While you should

always stay within your comfort zone, it’s okay to push the envelope a bit. For example, if you’re very conservative and are looking to dress a tad sexier but you’re not sure how to do it, take baby steps. Instead of wearing your little black dress with pumps and pearls, try a stiletto heel and a great pair of chandelier earrings. This takes your look from simple to sizzling with just a couple of changes, while staying within what’s comfortable for you.

Showing you’re in control

One of the great cries of women everywhere is, “I don’t know what to wear!” Now it’s one thing to say that in the privacy of your own home, but when you walk out the door, you don’t want anyone else wondering, “What was she thinking!?” You want to have control over your wardrobe and, more importantly, give the impression you have that control (even if you were in total panic five minutes before leaving the house). It’s all about looking put together as opposed to looking thrown together!

Keep in mind that looking put together doesn’t mean that everything you have on matches perfectly. To be honest, women who wear everything matchy matchy look more like fashion victims than mavens. The idea is to create an overall image that makes those looking at you think you were in complete control when you selected your outfit.

Only one item you’re wearing should pop. If you choose a patterned blouse, keep the rest of the outfit simple (see Figure 2-2). If you have an intricate necklace with a lot of beading, make that necklace the center of attention and go with one color when choosing the rest of the outfit (see Figure 2-3). This rule definitely has exceptions, but it serves as a great jumping-off point.

Figure 2-2: Pick one item to pop in your outfit.

Yes, you can break these rules, if you know what you’re doing. Mixing and matching patterns is definitely possible, but the key is that one or both arevery subtle and the color scheme must match. For example, you can wear a pinstripe pantsuit with a floral blouse. If the pinstripe is subtle, the blouse can take more of center stage (for more on matching patterns and colors, see Chapters 4 and 5). As long as the colors in the suit and the blouse are in the same family, or one is totally neutral, you’re good to go. Before you mix patterns, be confident you know what you’re doing. If you’re not sure, keep it simple and pair either pattern with a solid.

Reflecting different moods

To reflect every possible mood, you need the clothes to do that. When you go shopping, think about how a particular item of clothing or accessory can help you expand your ability to express yourself. If everything you own is very loud, how are you going to dress when you’re in a quieter mood? Or if everything you own is very subdued, you don’t have the option of really dressing up if you’re invited to a great party.

I’m not saying that if you love wearing all black, you need to ditch your entire ward- robe. What I am saying is that if black is your choice of color, make sure you have accessories, shoes, or bags that make your outfit pop when an event calls for it. Different colors make you feel different ways, so keep your options open!

Figure 2-3: Let your accessory be the focal point.

I love to wear all white. I think it’s extremely fresh and clean-looking. But white isn’t appropriate for all occasions. I wouldn’t wear all white in the dead of winter to a dinner party. My point? The color you wear (and the part of your personality you want to project) depends on the time and place.

Fitting perfectly — literally and figuratively

Every woman should develop her own personal style and create a wardrobe to express it. Building a style is a gradual process that happens as you find and collect pieces that fit into the big picture. Does that mean you have to look the same all the time? No. It’s okay to have subsets of style. The image you want to project at the office is going to be different than on the tennis court. But you have to remember that you’re projecting an image in both places. If you’re going to have a personal style, those images generally need to be compatible.

With that said, I know how overwhelming and confusing building a wardrobe can be. It may take some time before you have the confidence to walk into a mall or department store and instantly say, “Oh, that fits perfectly in my closet.” Finding items that are a perfect fit (and I mean that in both senses of the word) can be difficult. But look at it this way: Because you have so much to choose from, differentiating yourself from everyone else becomes a little easier, and after all, that’s really your goal.

Defining Your Personal Style

There’s no end to the type and amount of items you can purchase to jazz up your wardrobe. What you choose defines your personal style. So if the items you select are all of the latest fashion, then your style is going to be high fashion. If you choose to wear T-shirts and jeans every day, that too is a style statement. By carefully choosing what you wear every day, you’re projecting an image. The following sections help you get started in developing your own personal style.

Getting familiar with fabrics and styles

To have the confidence you need when buying clothing, you must become familiar with the different fabrics and styles. That way, when you grab an item from the clothing rack, you can be absolutely sure of what you’re buying. (For more information about what to look for, see Chapter 4.)

Keeping up with what’s “in” is also important. Picking up a fashion magazine every month is a great way to stay in the loop. And remember, the ads are just as important as the editorial pieces. Chapter 8 has the details on what to look for, but for now you just need to know that the magazines, as well as what you see celebs wearing on talk shows or the red carpet, can give you a glimpse into what’s hot. Even if you examine only one of these outlets, you’ll be able to pick up the basic trends like the latest hemlines, colors, cuts, and fabrics.

Considering your characteristics

What about you can be part of your personal style? Lots! Your lifestyle, age, profession, attitude, and hobbies all play a part in defining your personal style. Here are some guidelines:

✓ Lifestyle: Are you a single woman living in the big city or the mother of three running an entire household? When you’re on vacation, do you head for Broadway or the beach? The answers describe your lifestyle and, in turn, help define your personal style.

✓ Age: Everyone wants to look younger, right? The desire to knock off a few years is natural, and your wardrobe is one of the ways to do that. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to dress in the latest trends, but do it in an age- appropriate way. Some trends transcend generations. Asymmetrical necklines (see Figure 2-4), for example, were big at the Oscars and Golden Globes in 2009. Celebrities of all ages were wearing one-shoulder dresses as they graced the red carpets. It was just how they were wearing them that was different. Don’t be afraid to get in on the latest trend if it’s something you love. Just make sure you do it in a way that fits your age, personality, and body type.

If you like a current trend but feel it may be too youthful-looking for you, it probably is. This is true of fashions that reveal the most skin and are the most adorned. Use your judgment when trends veer in this direction, and err on the more conservative side.

✓ Profession: If you work in an office, the dress code is likely different than if you work in a store or at a school. Although you have to work within the constraints of your particular industry, you should be able to express your style no matter what the dress code.

✓ Attitude: Whether you’re a free spirit or some-one who’s more conservative, your clothing can reflect your attitude. Use your wardrobe to express yourself.

✓ Hobbies: What you do in your free time determines your look as well. Whether you’re running errands or running on the beach, your outfit reflects your personality and what you like to do.

Figure 2-4: One-shoulder dresses, a trend that can work at any age.

Figuring out your current style

In order to start building your closet properly, take this easy quiz. (Sorry to take you back to the 8th grade, but it’s a necessary first step!)

Pretend you’re a personal stylist who’s been hired to give you advice. Try to look at yourself as an outsider would when answering the following questions. Nobody knows you better than you do, but if you’ve never done a self-examination like this (and you probably haven’t), what you find out may surprise you. Have fun with this, be honest with yourself, and let your true personality answer every question.

Taking a style quiz

What’s your style? Take this quiz and find out! Circle the answers that best describe you:

1) You are most comfortable in

A) long, flowing dresses

B) cable-knit sweaters

C) a bikini

D) the latest trend

E) a white button-down shirt and jeans

F) a fitted sweat suit

2) When not working, you feel most like yourself

A) in a romantic vacation spot

B) on the tennis court in a country club

C) on a beach

D) in a big city

E) at home hosting an intimate dinner party

F) in your SUV with the kids

3) Your accessory of choice is

A) an armful of gold bangles

B) a strand or two of pearls

C) a rash guard

D) the new “it” bag

E) big, round, black “Jackie O” sunglasses

F) a diaper bag

4) The perfect everyday shoe for you is

A) flip-flops

B) loafers

C) barefoot

D) stilettos

E) flats

F) sneakers

5) You tend to wear

A) mostly white

B) lots of navy blue

C) bright colors

D) head-to-toe black

E) anything neutral

F) dark colors

Evaluating your answers

Now that you’ve taken our style quiz, find out who you are and how to define your look. If your answers fall mostly in the A’s, B’s, C’s, or so on, you fall pretty neatly into one of six groups, outlined in the following sections.

Mostly A’s: Group 1 — The bohemian

You are a true bohemian (see Figure 2-5). You love wearing loose-flowing, romantic tops, skirts, and dresses. You tend toward looking casual, yet pretty. Most of your clothes can go from day to night. You look like you just walked off the beach, no matter what time it is, because you have a relaxed, easy vibe about you. Your color palette includes white, off-white, white, and more white, earth tones, brown, and some beachy colors like turquoise and coral.

Figure 2-5: The true bohemian.

Figure 2-6: The prep.

Mostly B’s: Group 2 — The prep

You love to wear your polo shirts. You pair them with crisp pants or shorts, depending on the weather and the activity. You are likely to be seen in shorts at the country club during the day and pants at the evening barbeque. The cable knit sweater is the cornerstone of your wardrobe. Your color palette is navy blue, kelly green, and pink — all paired with crisp white, if not one another. Your wardrobe is also filled with bold prints, such as plaid, madras, and argyle, for when you’re in the mood to be noticed. The prep look (see Figure 2-6) is totally “old school” yet multigenerational and current as well.

Mostly C’s: Group 3 — The surfer chic

If you answered “C” to all or almost all the questions, you are the quint- essential surfer chic (see Figure 2-7). Your number one priority is how big the waves are. You don’t care what’s going on in the real world. Your world is the beach. You spend your mornings and evenings, and all day if possible, at the beach and out on the waves. Your outfit of choice is a bikini and rash guard, with sheep- skin boots (of course). Your color palette is red, yellow, and blue — all paired with sand or off-white. The bright colors are reminiscent of all the beautiful foliage in Hawaii. Plus, they let other surfers know you’re coming when you catch the big wave!

Figure 2-7: The surfer chic.

Figure 2-8: The fashionista.

Mostly D’s: Group 4 — The fashionista

If you answered “D” to all or almost all the questions, welcome to group 4. You’re the ultimate fashionista (see Figure 2-8)! You love the big city. You adore your uniform of all black with stiletto boots, stiletto pumps, or stiletto sandals. You love to dress up, be in all the latest trends, and wear all designer names. You’re never a fashion victim, and even if you can’t afford the high-end designer labels, you look like you do. You know which pieces to spend your money on and how to make the whole look appear expensive. You never miss an issue of Vogue, Elle, or Harper’s Bazaar. Your color palette is black and more black, paired with the color of the moment, which is, of course, “the new black.”

Mostly E’s: Group 5 — The classic

You’re in group 5 if the letter E came up the most, which makes you a total classic (see Figure 2-9). You have an easy way about dress- ing and are always put together and chic. You stick very close to the basics. You can buy your clothes at Gap or on Madison Avenue, or a combination — after all, a classic is a classic. Your wardrobe consists of white button-down shirts, jeans and slacks, the perfect black blazer, the perfect little black dress, and a fabulous trench coat or two. You also have a drawer full of beautiful scarves and a closet full of gorgeous purses. Your color palette is denim, white, and black, with splashes of color here and there in the form of an accessory such as a scarf or purse. Clothing is basically neutral in color. The ultimate example of a classic is, of course, Jackie O.

Mostly F’s: Group 6 — The suburbanite

Figure 2-9: The timeless classic.

Figure 2-10: The suburbanite.

If you answered mostly F’s, you fit comfortably into group 6, the realm of the suburbanite (see Figure 2-10). You have a casual lifestyle outside the big city. You spend most of your time taking care of everyone else, but you manage to squeeze in an exercise class, a trip to the gym, or a run out- side when you can. Errands and shuttling the kids take up a huge portion of your time, so you need to be comfortable, yet still feel stylish. A cute, well-fitting sweat suit is your go-to outfit first thing in the morning, and it generally carries you through all the day’s activities. If an evening activity is on the agenda, a quick change to slacks or jeans and a sweater or nice T-shirt does the trick. Your color palette consists of darker colors like navy, gray, and black. These colors are flattering and slimming and don’t show stains or wear and tear from all your daily activity.

Help! I didn’t have “mostly” anything

If your answers didn’t indicate a definite tendency toward one look or another, it means that you don’t currently dress in any particular style but throw on something generic to fit the activity. If that’s the case, this is an area you can work on. The easiest way to do so is to answer the questions according to how you picture yourself and see your life, rather than what it currently may be.

You don’t want to have too many styles going on at the same time. Of course, as your social settings change or your mood shifts, you want to be able to adapt your style to fit your needs at the time. But while there’s no doubt that you’ll have to massage your style regularly to get it to fit your schedule, you also don’t want to abandon it on a regular basis. Rather than attempting to develop different styles for different occasions, work on finding ways to use your personal style as a common thread in any outfit you put together.

Even if you aren’t entirely categorized by one group or another, picking a style and going with it can make life a lot easier. I’m not saying you can’t delve into other looks when the mood strikes or the occasion arises — but to develop a personal style, you need to narrow it down.

Building Your Stylish Wardrobe

After you have an idea of the direction you want to go in, you can get started searching for the tools — that is, the clothing and accessories — that can help you to meet your goal. Woo-hoo! Time to have some fun. Your closet is about to get a makeover, and so are you! The next section has the details.

Using my 10 System to create the perfect closet

Once you decide on your style direction, it’s time to focus on what you have going on behind those closet doors. Quality, fit, and style are the most important factors when creating your wardrobe. This means everything in your closet should be first-rate, whether it’s a formal gown or sweat pants. So here’s the deal about your closet (and read this sentence over and over again): Everything in it is a 10 — that is, the best — or it’s about to be. If it isn’t a 10, guess where it’s going? Yup! Out the door. Nothing less than a 10 is acceptable. No, not even to just run to the market, walk the dog, or lounge in at home.

In order for your clothing to be considered a 10, it has to pass the following test. And, yes, you must go through your closet piece by piece, trying things on and asking these five questions of every single item. These questions are in no particular order and are all equally important. Be ruthless! This is not a multiple-choice portion of the book. Every criteria in this list needs to be met or the item is out the door like a bad date!

You must be brutally honest with yourself. Sometimes it helps to have a friend with you, someone whose fashion sense you trust (but any really honest friend will do). It makes the whole process a lot more fun, and you can do it for each other, so you both benefit.

What condition is it in?

Before you even try anything on, take a look at each garment and survey its condition. Is it permanently stained? Are there holes beyond repair? Is it stretched out to the point that it no longer fits well? Is the material pilly (does it have those little round nubby things that cling to lots of sweaters in particular)? If you answer yes to any or all of these questions, you don’t even need to try it on. Toss those pieces straight onto the donation pile.

Does it fit?

If it passed the quality control test, the next step is to try it on. Does it fit? And, more importantly, is it flattering? Is it really a 10? Do you feel like a mil- lion bucks when you put it on? If not, it’s outta there.

If you have a blouse that goes perfectly with a particular pair of pants but it happens to be a little tight so that it shows off that bulge around your tummy, then it’s the wrong choice for you. Ditch it! If you feel uncomfortable about its defects, you won’t wear it no matter how well it goes with the pants. Better to get rid of that blouse and avoid feeling conflicted every time you see it than to keep it just because it’s the only blouse you have in that color.

Is it in style?

Is the piece in style? If not, is it more of a classic piece that will always be in style? Or is it a high-quality item that may come back into style? (The latter scenario is rare. Even when things come back into style years later, they’re always a bit different. Remember the shoulder pads in the 1980s? Well, when they tried to bring them back recently, the pads were on a much smaller scale and the whole trend didn’t really take off again, so those pieces weren’t worth keeping anyway.) So, if the piece isn’t a classic and is truly last year’s trend (or even last decade’s trend), out it goes.

Is it relevant to your current life?

How does this garment fit into your life? Is it an old college sweat shirt? Are they your spinning shoes, and you haven’t seen the inside of a gym in years? Is it a sweater set from your younger, more conservative days? Take stock of your day-to-day life and your activities, and then evaluate what you actually need and actually wear. Do you need office clothes, workout clothes, party clothes? It can be all of the above, but if you don’t play tennis anymore or don’t work in an office anymore, or if anything in your life has changed that affects your wardrobe, then you need to be okay with letting these pieces go. Don’t get sentimental about your old suits. If you don’t use them, someone else may be able to. Isn’t that a lot better? And just think about how nice your closet will look with less clutter!

Where to take the things you don’t want

After you know what you’re getting rid of, the next thing is to figure out what to do with the outgoing piles. Here are the options:

✓ Charities: Any number of charities would be more than thrilled to receive the goods you’re unloading, such as homeless shelters, women’s shelters, and other charitable organizations like Dress for Success.

✓ Vintage shops: If it’s truly a vintage piece, designer, and really worth something — just not something that still fits you or your life — you can try selling it to a high-end vintage shop.

✓ Consignment shops: If the item isn’t really vintage or high-end but is in good condition, relatively current, and is a recognizable brand with possibly some resale value, then by all means take it to a consignment shop. You may be able to get some cash for it. Some shops pay you only if or when they sell the items (hence, the name “consignment.”) Other shops pay you upfront for the merchandise.

Nothing feels better than purging all that excess from your closet. You’ll be so happy you did. Just think about all the room you’ll have for all your fabulous new clothes. Plus, you’ll actually be able to see what great pieces you already have and can use to start putting together fashionable outfits.

Do you ever actually wear it?

This is where you really have to be straight with yourself. We all have things in our closet that we’re either “saving” or we just think we may wear some- day in this other life we’re not living. Sometimes, the piece isn’t really your style or color, but you think it’s a nice top and you may find a reason to wear it one day. Trust me, you won’t. If it’s something you put on and then change out of every time before you leave the house, you really don’t feel comfort- able in it, so don’t even bother. Just get rid of it.

If there’s even a question, a maybe, it’s out. Seriously.

Obviously, if your ex-boyfriend gave you a sweat shirt back in high school, you can keep that. Yes, even if it’s full of holes. But there better be a really good story behind any item you choose to keep that isn’t a 10!

In with the new: A-shopping you will go

Dressing in style doesn’t mean that every single item you wear every day has to be brand new. Although some women have the luxury to do that, the vast majority of women don’t have the money, the time, or the storage for all the clothes and accessories needed to accomplish that. Nor do you have to throw out every thing you already own to develop a personal style. Your shopping goal at this point is to add classic-looking basics and pieces that truly express the new look you want. That means you want to begin purchasing any fashion essentials that you’re missing.

The following basic items are the building blocks for every wardrobe. Incorporate them with other pieces to express your personality and style. When you shop for these items, consider your body type and fit when choosing the cut, length, and style that works for you. I explain how to determine what you need for your body type in Chapter 3:

✓ Little black dress (LBD)

✓ Black blazer

✓ Crisp white button-down shirt

✓ Black trousers

✓ Knee-length black skirt

✓ Classic beige trench coat

✓ Black leather bag

✓ Dark denim jeans

✓ Pair of black pumps

✓ White cardigan sweater (to layer)

✓ Black cardigan sweater (to layer)

✓ Set of pearls

✓ Diamond studs (can be cubic if need be — just keep them small)

You may already have some of these items, but are they really high quality? If not, replace them with high-quality items. For these staples, it’s okay to spend a little more. (You can wait for a sale, but keep in mind that some of these items don’t go on sale very often because they’re always in demand.) If you don’t have the money for a new one now, it’s better to wear your old raincoat for another season and buy a really good one next year. Remember, you’re not on a schedule. Building a stylish wardrobe is a gradual process.

These staple garments are the basis of your wardrobe; they have their own style — classic — and that speaks volumes. After you establish your basic wardrobe, you’ll add additional pieces to create your personal style.

As you shop, keep these tips in mind:

✓ Choose clothes that blend in rather than stand out. Creating a style using accessories is easier and less expensive, but for those accessories to shine, you need clothes that frame them, not overwhelm them. So make sure you have enough solids in your wardrobe. Having solids that you can wear over and over is easier on your budget and makes putting outfits together easier, too. You can do this with neutrals, which can be anything in the white, black, gray, or beige family.

✓ Shop online or use the Web if you lack the time to go shopping. If you’re completely frazzled when you hit the mall, then your attitude may stop you from seeing how a particular article of clothing can help you to express yourself. Offsetting this lack of time are all the new ways to shop, especially the Internet. If you can’t get to a store, set aside some time at night when you can surf the Web. Even if you don’t buy anything, you can print out the type of clothes you like. Then when you go to a store, you can follow the decisions you made when you weren’t so stressed out.

✓ Buy things you like. Even if you buy an item at a time, after a while they’ll start to match up. After all, they all suit your taste, and with that common denominator, eventually they’ll mesh. So if you see a blouse that you really love but you feel like you have nothing to go with it, buy it! Trust me, you probably already own something it will go with, or you’ll buy something soon enough that will be its perfect mate! By the way, 99 percent of all the blouses you own will go with jeans, a black pencil skirt, or classic black pants. (Just an FYI for when you say to yourself “I have nothing to wear with this!”)

Getting help from the pros

As you shop for pieces to include in your new stylish wardrobe, asking a salesperson for assistance is often helpful. She’ll know the lay of the land and can direct you straight to what you’re looking for so you can avoid wandering around aimlessly (to later purchase something you don’t need).

When you find a helpful salesperson in one department, let her know which department you’re going to next and ask who you should ask to see. Chances are, she’ll be able to guide you toward another salesperson who “gets” it.

If you think that you’re really clueless and you need more than just a department store salesperson, then you need to find a fashion consultant. A sales- person is limited to the clothes in that store, but an outside professional can steer you toward a variety of stores where you can find what you need.

Hiring a fashion consultant can also be a good first step in the process of deciding what your personal style should be. The two of you can create your style, develop a game plan, and go out shopping. Then, if need be, you can continue to shop on your own or engage the consultant on a regular basis to go on shopping trips — either with you or for you.

For more information on how sales associates, personal shoppers, and fashion consultants can help you, go to Chapter 8.

Fashion 101

In This Chapter

▶ Who’s who in the fashion industry

▶ Taking important steps toward developing your own style

▶ Fitting your wardrobe needs into your budget

▶ Making the impression you want

You may have been born naked, but minutes later a nurse wrapped you in swaddling (how chic an outfit is that!), and you’ve been wearing clothes ever since. While some women have mastered the art of fashion and look fabulous all the time, many still struggle to figure it all out. If you are one of the women still searching for what exactly to wear every day, you’ve come to the right place. Whether you’re going to the grocery store or heading to a gala, I want you to feel your best at all times, no exceptions.

As children, most of us were dressed by our parents. As teenagers, you likely just followed the trend du jour. But as adults, the options are end- less. Because the choices are so vast, how can you possibly arrive at your very own style? After all, while you may find your one true love after dating less than a dozen people, you can fall in love with a dozen pairs of shoes in one store alone. Now, the ideal solution for many people would be to hire a personal shopper and leave the decision-making to expert hands. Unfortunately, few people can afford that route. So the next best plan is to gain a better understanding of how to develop your personal style. This chapter gives you all the info you need to begin that journey.

The Real Trendsetters

Literally thousands of fashion designers around the world are busily turning out mountains of clothing, and as the media continues to focus more and more attention on the fashion industry, hundreds of new designers are trying to make their way into the field every year. With so many working fashion designers, it’s not surprising that you, the fashion consumer, have a flood of new clothing to choose from. If you feel like you’re swimming upstream in this tide of satin, leather, and beading, try to take comfort in knowing you’re not alone.

While each new fashion season brings out a variety of new styles that make you feel like everything in your closet is dated, not every designer has an impact on the latest trends. There’s a filtering process between the designers’ creations and the hottest trends that land in your closet. Figure 1-1 shows a designer outfit and a mass market outfit based on that design.

You may wonder how all those who make the cut seem to know that it’s time to raise hemlines or douse the world in plum. You may also wonder what role, if any, the buying public has in this process. Getting the answers to these questions helps you figure out what you need to wear day and night.

Although fashion may seem like a one-way street, with all the clothes streaming out of Seventh Avenue and into the malls and boutiques nearest you, the truth is far different. Quite a number of people actually set the trends: designers, buyers, fashion houses, the fashion media, and, believe it or not, you. You have a much greater influence on what designs actually end up in the stores than you may think. The following sections outline the key players.

Designers

Designers are people with creative vision. They have an idea about the way clothing should look, and they take this idea all the way from an initial sketch to an actual sample to, hopefully, a store near you. Top designers dis- play their latest creations at shows held in New York, Paris, and Milan (see Figure 1-2).

Figure 1-1: From the runway to real life.

Naturally the big name designers have more clout than those that are lesser known, but even they aren’t operating in a vacuum. Everyone in the fashion industry has his or her finger in the wind, trying to decipher what the next trend may be. And the fashion designers aren’t the only ones navigating public taste. The buyers (who pick and choose from the designers’ collections, determining what makes it from the runway to you) also have a huge impact.

Figure 1-2: A design on a runway.

Buyers

Buyers are the people who decide, for every upcoming season, what will be hanging on the clothing racks in a store near you. Every store — from large department stores to small boutiques — has a buyer (or buyers). The buyers for the major retail outlets are one of the most important filters of the fashion trade. They have to be sure about what they’re buying, because if the general consumer has different tastes, the stores end up with a ton of extra merchandise that will just end up on the sale rack.

Back in 1919, an attempt was made to artificially change the course of fashion. Pressure was put on the fashion industry to stop raising hemlines because showing so much leg was thought to be damaging America’s morals. Designers responded and agreed to send hemlines back downward. The only problem was that women weren’t fans of the new fad, and so the longer skirts and dresses bombed, and American women roared into the 1920s wearing flapper dresses.

Fashion houses and their ads

Fashion houses are the companies behind the bigger name designers. They’re considered houses because the company bears the designer’s name, even after the designer has retired and someone else has taken over designing the label. The fashion houses influence trends and, consequently, sales through the use of advertising. If you look through a fashion magazine, you see that most of the pages are ads. These ads, which are just as visually interesting and informative as the editorial pages, can have quite an impact. For example, department stores didn’t want to stock designer jeans back in the 1980s, but the ads placed by the jeans companies created the public demand, and it wasn’t long before those jeans were in every store.

Fashion media

Another important set of players is the fashion media, which is led by the major fashion magazines such as Vogue, Elle, and Harper’s Bazaar. The fashion media decode what’s happening on the runways and download all the information to you. Anyone interested in fashion looks to these trend-setting publications (or their Web sites) to see what’s in style and what is the next “must have.”

Long before the designs hit the stores, the magazines’ editors choose what to feature in their magazines from the hundreds of looks on the runway. Because the fashion shows are about six months ahead of the next fashion season, and the fashion magazines are sent to the printer two to three months ahead of when they hit the newsstand, the editors, who consult closely with the fashion designers, try to look ahead and anticipate what will be popular. Because of their position as a fashion authority, their decisions exert a considerable amount of influence.

The other players

Other prognosticators also have a role to play. One example is the Color Marketing Group, a non-profit organization made up of design professionals from all sorts of fields, from fashion to interior design, who get together every year and decide that, say, powder blue will be “the” color for the next year. That sets off the fabric and yarn manufacturers to stock up on material for the fashion designers in this color.

Trend forecasters also play a role. Most of the big design houses have either in-house staff whose job it is to know what trends are coming around the corner, or they hire firms (yes, there are firms that do this) that specialize in predicting trends. These people are well versed in what’s cool in the celebrity world, with teenagers, and pretty much everything going on in pop culture. They also have to keep abreast of what all the other designers are doing. Not only do they know what’s going on now, but they are also steps ahead. Remember, the designers are designing their collections way ahead of when the trends will be “in.” They show their lines six months ahead of when they will be in stores and are designing even further ahead than that.

And stylists like Dana Ravich, who along with Pierre co-authored this book, dress stars for big red carpet events and for appearances on television shows or in print. If a celebrity is wearing a dress from an up-and-coming designer, that could be his or her ticket to fame, too.

You

The designers, buyers, and magazines can tell you what’s in style and guide you toward what to buy, but at the end of the day, it’s up to you. What makes the most sense for you, your lifestyle, and your body type determines what you purchase. After you develop your personal style, you can take cues from all these outside influences in order to navigate through all this information and make the choices that are right for you.

Getting Your Personal Style Started

Some of the factors that go into deciding what to wear include where you live, what your interests are, where you work, what you like to do when socializing, and what colors and styles suit your body type. By weaving all these factors together (as Chapter 2 does), you can create your own personal style. To find out what belongs in your personal wardrobe, see Chapter 7.

Decide which trends can work for you

If you pick up a fashion magazine and look at the outfits the beautiful models are wearing, you may think, “What does this have to do with how I dress?” But even though you may not buy one of those designer outfits, it can give you clues on how to dress fashionably.

To begin with, when flipping the pages of a fashion magazine, stop and take a good look at those outfits that attract you. Decide what you find appealing about that particular look. You should even take notes. If you see a dress with an off-the-shoulder style showing off the model’s collarbones and that’s a body part you like, take note. If, while flipping the pages, you see that several other designers are also making off-the-shoulder styles, you’ve spotted a trend that you’ll want to make yours.

Because magazines usually show photos of clothes for coming seasons, these designs may not yet be in stores. So tear out the pictures that you like. They can help when you’re shopping because you’ll know exactly what to look for. And if you’re tempted to buy a random dress at the end of the current season just because it’s on sale, the pictures you’re carrying around will inspire you to wait for the style you’re seeking. This is especially important if your budget only allows you to buy a few pieces.

Know your body

Of course clothing comes in all different sizes, but just because an outfit comes in your size doesn’t mean that it suits you. Some designers know how to make creations that can be adapted to women who don’t fit the runway mold. Other designers have a great eye for color and fabric, but when it comes to cut, they’re more the one-size-better-fit-all types. Your job is to learn what your body shape is and find out what types of clothes flatter your figure. If you find a designer whose fit works for your body, check out the rest of his or her line. Chances are good that all the pieces will fit you well. (Go to Chapter 3 for help in identifying your body shape and developing a better understanding of what clothes can make you look your best. Go to Part IV for advice on how to dress fashionably for any occasion.)

Many women buy clothes that don’t fit, using the excuse that this gives them the incentive to get into shape or lose ten pounds. Some brides are able to meet such goals because they’re aiming for one particular and very important day in their lives, but most women don’t end up ever wearing those clothes. Of course, if you are aiming to lose weight (great!); I’m not trying to discourage you. But a more practical (and successful) strategy is to invest in pieces you can wear as the beautiful you that you are right now.

Make educated purchases

To make educated purchases, you have to understand a few fashion basics, like what styles look best on you, what fabrics are appropriate for certain seasons, and what colors are you. If you are not equipped with all the information you need, shopping efficiently can be challenging.

When you shop, look at the short term (“I just love the way this looks on me”) and the long term (“Is this something I must have in my closet?”). If you see a pair of trendy gladiator sandals, ask yourself, “Is this something I need, or should I use this money toward a great black cashmere cardigan?”

Buying trendier, less expensive items is fine, but buying quality pieces that can last you many seasons is essential. The decision-making process isn’t just about the way an article of clothing looks, but also how it was made. Head to Chapters 4 and 5 to pick up the required basics.

Determine where you want to fit in

A key to building your wardrobe is to decide what you want your overall personal style to be. If you’re a mother of three and spend most of your days playing with your children and carpooling, a good portion of your wardrobe will be geared to that. But you are also a woman with a personality of your own, and your wardrobe should have pieces of clothing that work off the playground as well.

So what should determine your style? Would you prefer to look like you’d fit right in walking down the streets of a fashion capital like New York, Milan, or Paris? Or are you more comfortable adopting the style more popular to the area where you live? (Figure 1-3 shows two outfits, one that would look good in a fashion center and another that is more mainstream.) Or do you want to identify with a particular group? If you work in an office, you need to under- stand the dress code of that environment, and when socializing among your friends, you want to dress appropriately for the occasion, all the while being true to your personal sense of style.

Figure 1-3: Your personal style is defined by many different aspects of your life.

During the course of a week, or maybe even a very hectic day, you could change your outfit over and over again, depending on where you are and where you’re going. But rather than consider playing clothes chameleon a chore, look at it as an endless series of opportunities to look gorgeous and express your personal style. To do that, you need to build up confidence in your ability to dress in the right attire no matter what the setting.

Figure out how you want the world to see you

What you choose to put on your body when you wake up in the morning says a lot about how you feel on any particular day. Even the most basic outfit can say so much. Take jeans and a T-shirt, for example — an ensemble most women can relate to. The number of combinations you can put together with these two items is endless, but each look sends out a very different message. If you’re going for cute, you can pair a T-shirt with boyfriend jeans (a baggy jean that’s often cuffed and distressed) and flip-flops (see Figure 1-4). If you’re going for “hot and sexy,” add jewelry and stilettos to your basic look, and you’ve gone from simple to sexy in a flash (see Figure 1-5). For a more sophisticated look, try a blazer over your T-shirt with a trouser jean and black pump (see Figure 1-6). And a cute sweatshirt with a pair of ripped jeans that you’ve had forever can show that even on a casual Sunday, you put effort into looking cozy yet adorable (see Figure 1-7).

Figure 1-4: A casual, cute look.

Figure 1-5: A great pair of jeans and high heels is a sexy look.

Now I understand that after a long work week, the last thing you want to do is try to look hot while running to get the newspapers. What I am saying is that, in the split-second of choosing what to wear for the day, make an effort to go the more flattering, put-together route. Doing so not only gives you more confidence to start the day, but it also prepares you for anything (or anyone) that comes your way! You may think of jeans and a T-shirt as only one kind of look, but even the most basic outfit can represent many different aspects of your personality, as Figures 1-4 through 1-7 show.

Figure 1-6: Jeans can be very sophisticated.

Most of the time, you pay attention to what you’re wearing because you’re going out of the house. When you’re home relaxing, you’re likely to throw on any old thing or your favorite sweats. (And, of course, that’s okay.) However, sexiness and personal style develop only with confidence. My point? You should feel your best at all times. If you’re sitting at home, do it in your favorite sweats and your coziest T-shirt. If you’re heading to the market in sweats, make them look casual but sexy (yes, there is a way to make sweats  look cute!).

To motivate your- self to abandon the “it doesn’t matter how I look” mentality, try this: Remind yourself that you may run into someone you haven’t seen in years. Nine times out of ten you won’t, but you may. I want you to look great and feel fabulous at all times because then you’ll impress the person who is most important to you: you.

Go for diversity

A spice rack with 25 herbs lets you express yourself so much better than a spice rack with only salt and pepper. The same is true of your wardrobe. The more variety you have to choose from, the more you can express your personal style, which is only possible when your wardrobe has the depth to match all sorts of moods.

Figure 1-7: Even cozy can be stylish.

When shopping, look at each purchase to see whether it expands your repertoire or is just another item like most of the others in your closet. Sure, you may love wearing gray, but if you already have numerous tops in your favorite color, try grabbing a top that highlights a different part of your personality. But always remember to buy only items that you’ll wear. Don’t buy a green top just because you don’t have one, if green isn’t a good color for you. The goal is to expand your wardrobe and express your style, all while staying in your color palette and wearing clothes that suit your body type.

If you’re not sure of the vibes you want to give off when you’re getting dressed in the morning, pick an outfit that allows you to add some variations. If you choose a monochromatic blouse, for example, stick a scarf (or a pair of fabulous chandelier earrings) in your purse, so that you can jazz it up if you end up going out for a drink after work. Try to think ahead. If your outfit is one that can be livened up, you’ll be able to say, “Let’s go” when someone suggests doing something fun.

Build your wardrobe to include both basics and trendy stuff

For most photo shoots, the person being photographed hires a stylist who brings various outfits to choose from to achieve the perfect look. When Dana and I were choosing what to wear for the front and back covers of this book, we just went shopping in my closet. We were laughing, saying, “We really do practice what we preach!” I had every basic item we needed to convey to you exactly what we wanted to. My point? Having basics in your wardrobe is a must. (The black dress on the back of the book is one I’ve had for eight years.) Now, I am not saying I don’t have trendy items in my closet — I do. But I’m careful when buying something that I know will be out next season, and I don’t spend as much money on it as I do on something I know will be around for a while. Your closet, too, should include the basics and a few trendy things.

Fitting Your Style to Your Budget

In creating a style, you’re going to run into a reality check, otherwise known as your clothing budget. If you happen to have an unlimited amount of money to spend on clothes, then you can skip this section. But because most people do have to watch what they spend, learning to shop within your budget is an important skill to develop.

Spend more on the basics, less on the trendier things

Some people approach clothes shopping as they do their grocery shopping. They make a list of what they need and go out searching for the cheapest price. While stretching your food dollars this way can be quite effective, it doesn’t always work with clothing. I encourage you to spend more on certain staples, items that will take you from season to season and look rich with any outfit. Trendier items are the pieces to save on because they may only last you the season. (In Part III, I explain what to look for so that even your “save” items will look like splurges.)

Sales are great times to buy staples, seasonless items, and classic pieces. Although the store just needs to clear space for new shipments, that classic pair of black Calvin Klein pants marked down and down again may fit perfectly in your wardrobe. Sale racks often take time (and patience, for that matter) to look through, but don’t walk by because you feel like sales mean something is of poor quality. Quite often, it’s just the opposite. (To find out more about this topic, check out Chapter 7.)

Take stock of your wardrobe

The temptation for many women to go out and buy clothing is a strong one. If you think your wardrobe has a hole that needs filling, you could just take the first opportunity to hit your local stores or surf the Web. But at some point you’ll likely run into the ceiling of your clothing budget, and you don’t want that to happen at a time when you need the perfect dress for a special occasion.

So don’t always be so quick to look for an opportunity to shop outside your closet. Shopping can give you a psychological boost, but if you’re using it as a way to lift your spirits rather than as a way to create a look for yourself, then you’re almost certain to miss both goals. Rather than reach for your credit card every time you feel like it, do what every clothing store does several times a year: Take inventory.

If you don’t take stock of what you already have in your closet, you’re likely to buy the same thing over and over again because that’s what you’re drawn to. Being organized and allowing yourself to really see what you have gives you the freedom to buy new pieces you may have otherwise overlooked.

I’m not suggesting you enter every item you own into an Excel spreadsheet. Still, you should take some time as a new season is about to arrive to go through all your clothes and give away whatever isn’t perfect for you. (For more on how to pare the ordinary or unexceptional from your closet, see the next section for a brief introduction on my 10 System and Chapter 2 for additional details.) At the same time, make a list of what you need and put down as many details as possible. For example, “a white button-down shirt to wear under blazers” may top your list. That way the next time you’re looking through the racks in your favorite store, you’ll able to fill in the gaps in your closet.

Some people give away items as soon as they buy a new one. While that method preserves closet space, it places unnecessary limits on you — especially if you’re a good shopper. There’s no reason to get rid of one pair of navy slacks just because you buy another pair, especially if you can wear the new pair in a different way. Maybe you wear one pair to work with ballet flats because they’re too short to wear with heels. Another pair of navy slacks that you can wear with heels wouldn’t be considered a repetitive item in your wardrobe. Although both slacks look similar, they serve different purposes.

Invest only in10s

My main goal in this book is to help you concentrate on quality instead of quantity. I would rather you own one black blazer that fits you perfectly and is of the best quality than four that are “eh” — which leads me to my 10 System: Every item you have should be evaluated on a scale of 1 to 10, and only 10s should remain in your closet. Every blazer, sweater, or pair of jeans (shall I go on?) must fit this requirement to keep a place in your fabulous closet. As you go through the next chapters, keep this scale in mind. (To find out more about the 10 System, see Chapter 2.)

Throughout this book, you’ll find tips on how to shop for key items, especially in the chapters in Part IV. Because these important garments have to be close to perfect, they may require the extra expense of being altered by a professional tailor. Although I try to help you save money throughout this book, in some instances, I encourage you to spend a little extra because it’ll pay off in the long run.

Figure 1-8: Look casual yet sophisticated with a white button-down under a sweater.

Prolong that new clothes feel

Putting on a new article of clothing is a great feeling. Even if no one notices, you know that your mood has been elevated. But after a while, that blouse (or pants or scarf) joins the ranks of all the other items in your closet. Even though it’s no worse for wear, it loses the punch it once had on your emotions. It’s no different than if you ate your favorite dish over and over. After a while, you’ll yawn instead of salivate when you see it on the menu.

While you can’t stop this process, you can slow it down. Learning how to rein- vent pieces you have is key. For example, a white button- down shirt can take you many different places. It can be worn under a sweater, as in Figure 1-8. When you are on vacation in a tropical place, it can be tied over a bathing suit and paired with a long skirt (see Figure 1-9). If you’re heading to work, it can be worn with a sweater-vest (see Figure 1-10). And finally, if you’re off to a fancy event, you can dress it up by pairing it with a sequin skirt, as in Figure 1-11.

Figure 1-9: Your white button- down will have you looking beach-chic.

Excessive buying is not the best way to estab- lish personal style. Being smart and having key, versatile pieces in your closet will make you the fashion queen you want to be!

Figure 1-10: A vest can be a perfect complement to a white button-down shirt.

A Last Important Point

Throughout this book I talk a lot about personal style. My hope is that you’ll use all the information here to figure out the overall image you want to project to the world. When all is said and done, no matter what you’re wearing, you have to be yourself. If that means certain styles are not for you, so be it. But with so much to choose from, you can be sure to find pieces that are perfect for you. And by the time you’ve finished reading this book, you’ll know just how to be the stylish woman you’ve always dreamed of being!

Figure 1-11: You can dress up your white button down if heading to a fancy affair.

Fashion 101

In This Chapter

▶ Who’s who in the fashion industry

▶ Taking important steps toward developing your own style

▶ Fitting your wardrobe needs into your budget

▶ Making the impression you want

You may have been born naked, but minutes later a nurse wrapped you in swaddling (how chic an outfit is that!), and you’ve been wearing clothes ever since. While some women have mastered the art of fashion and look fabulous all the time, many still struggle to figure it all out. If you are one of the women still searching for what exactly to wear every day, you’ve come to the right place. Whether you’re going to the grocery store or heading to a gala, I want you to feel your best at all times, no exceptions.

As children, most of us were dressed by our parents. As teenagers, you likely just followed the trend du jour. But as adults, the options are end- less. Because the choices are so vast, how can you possibly arrive at your very own style? After all, while you may find your one true love after dating less than a dozen people, you can fall in love with a dozen pairs of shoes in one store alone. Now, the ideal solution for many people would be to hire a personal shopper and leave the decision-making to expert hands. Unfortunately, few people can afford that route. So the next best plan is to gain a better understanding of how to develop your personal style. This chapter gives you all the info you need to begin that journey.

The Real Trendsetters

Literally thousands of fashion designers around the world are busily turning out mountains of clothing, and as the media continues to focus more and more attention on the fashion industry, hundreds of new designers are trying to make their way into the field every year. With so many working fashion designers, it’s not surprising that you, the fashion consumer, have a flood of new clothing to choose from. If you feel like you’re swimming upstream in this tide of satin, leather, and beading, try to take comfort in knowing you’re not alone.

While each new fashion season brings out a variety of new styles that make you feel like everything in your closet is dated, not every designer has an impact on the latest trends. There’s a filtering process between the designers’ creations and the hottest trends that land in your closet. Figure 1-1 shows a designer outfit and a mass market outfit based on that design.

You may wonder how all those who make the cut seem to know that it’s time to raise hemlines or douse the world in plum. You may also wonder what role, if any, the buying public has in this process. Getting the answers to these questions helps you figure out what you need to wear day and night.

Although fashion may seem like a one-way street, with all the clothes streaming out of Seventh Avenue and into the malls and boutiques nearest you, the truth is far different. Quite a number of people actually set the trends: designers, buyers, fashion houses, the fashion media, and, believe it or not, you. You have a much greater influence on what designs actually end up in the stores than you may think. The following sections outline the key players.

Designers

Designers are people with creative vision. They have an idea about the way clothing should look, and they take this idea all the way from an initial sketch to an actual sample to, hopefully, a store near you. Top designers dis- play their latest creations at shows held in New York, Paris, and Milan (see Figure 1-2).

Figure 1-1: From the runway to real life.

Naturally the big name designers have more clout than those that are lesser known, but even they aren’t operating in a vacuum. Everyone in the fashion industry has his or her finger in the wind, trying to decipher what the next trend may be. And the fashion designers aren’t the only ones navigating public taste. The buyers (who pick and choose from the designers’ collections, determining what makes it from the runway to you) also have a huge impact.

Figure 1-2: A design on a runway.

Buyers

Buyers are the people who decide, for every upcoming season, what will be hanging on the clothing racks in a store near you. Every store — from large department stores to small boutiques — has a buyer (or buyers). The buyers for the major retail outlets are one of the most important filters of the fashion trade. They have to be sure about what they’re buying, because if the general consumer has different tastes, the stores end up with a ton of extra merchandise that will just end up on the sale rack.

Back in 1919, an attempt was made to artificially change the course of fashion. Pressure was put on the fashion industry to stop raising hemlines because showing so much leg was thought to be damaging America’s morals. Designers responded and agreed to send hemlines back downward. The only problem was that women weren’t fans of the new fad, and so the longer skirts and dresses bombed, and American women roared into the 1920s wearing flapper dresses.

Fashion houses and their ads

Fashion houses are the companies behind the bigger name designers. They’re considered houses because the company bears the designer’s name, even after the designer has retired and someone else has taken over designing the label. The fashion houses influence trends and, consequently, sales through the use of advertising. If you look through a fashion magazine, you see that most of the pages are ads. These ads, which are just as visually interesting and informative as the editorial pages, can have quite an impact. For example, department stores didn’t want to stock designer jeans back in the 1980s, but the ads placed by the jeans companies created the public demand, and it wasn’t long before those jeans were in every store.

Fashion media

Another important set of players is the fashion media, which is led by the major fashion magazines such as Vogue, Elle, and Harper’s Bazaar. The fashion media decode what’s happening on the runways and download all the information to you. Anyone interested in fashion looks to these trend-setting publications (or their Web sites) to see what’s in style and what is the next “must have.”

Long before the designs hit the stores, the magazines’ editors choose what to feature in their magazines from the hundreds of looks on the runway. Because the fashion shows are about six months ahead of the next fashion season, and the fashion magazines are sent to the printer two to three months ahead of when they hit the newsstand, the editors, who consult closely with the fashion designers, try to look ahead and anticipate what will be popular. Because of their position as a fashion authority, their decisions exert a considerable amount of influence.

The other players

Other prognosticators also have a role to play. One example is the Color Marketing Group, a non-profit organization made up of design professionals from all sorts of fields, from fashion to interior design, who get together every year and decide that, say, powder blue will be “the” color for the next year. That sets off the fabric and yarn manufacturers to stock up on material for the fashion designers in this color.

Trend forecasters also play a role. Most of the big design houses have either in-house staff whose job it is to know what trends are coming around the corner, or they hire firms (yes, there are firms that do this) that specialize in predicting trends. These people are well versed in what’s cool in the celebrity world, with teenagers, and pretty much everything going on in pop culture. They also have to keep abreast of what all the other designers are doing. Not only do they know what’s going on now, but they are also steps ahead. Remember, the designers are designing their collections way ahead of when the trends will be “in.” They show their lines six months ahead of when they will be in stores and are designing even further ahead than that.

And stylists like Dana Ravich, who along with Pierre co-authored this book, dress stars for big red carpet events and for appearances on television shows or in print. If a celebrity is wearing a dress from an up-and-coming designer, that could be his or her ticket to fame, too.

You

The designers, buyers, and magazines can tell you what’s in style and guide you toward what to buy, but at the end of the day, it’s up to you. What makes the most sense for you, your lifestyle, and your body type determines what you purchase. After you develop your personal style, you can take cues from all these outside influences in order to navigate through all this information and make the choices that are right for you.

Getting Your Personal Style Started

Some of the factors that go into deciding what to wear include where you live, what your interests are, where you work, what you like to do when socializing, and what colors and styles suit your body type. By weaving all these factors together (as Chapter 2 does), you can create your own personal style. To find out what belongs in your personal wardrobe, see Chapter 7.

Decide which trends can work for you

If you pick up a fashion magazine and look at the outfits the beautiful models are wearing, you may think, “What does this have to do with how I dress?” But even though you may not buy one of those designer outfits, it can give you clues on how to dress fashionably.

To begin with, when flipping the pages of a fashion magazine, stop and take a good look at those outfits that attract you. Decide what you find appealing about that particular look. You should even take notes. If you see a dress with an off-the-shoulder style showing off the model’s collarbones and that’s a body part you like, take note. If, while flipping the pages, you see that several other designers are also making off-the-shoulder styles, you’ve spotted a trend that you’ll want to make yours.

Because magazines usually show photos of clothes for coming seasons, these designs may not yet be in stores. So tear out the pictures that you like. They can help when you’re shopping because you’ll know exactly what to look for. And if you’re tempted to buy a random dress at the end of the current season just because it’s on sale, the pictures you’re carrying around will inspire you to wait for the style you’re seeking. This is especially important if your budget only allows you to buy a few pieces.

Know your body

Of course clothing comes in all different sizes, but just because an outfit comes in your size doesn’t mean that it suits you. Some designers know how to make creations that can be adapted to women who don’t fit the runway mold. Other designers have a great eye for color and fabric, but when it comes to cut, they’re more the one-size-better-fit-all types. Your job is to learn what your body shape is and find out what types of clothes flatter your figure. If you find a designer whose fit works for your body, check out the rest of his or her line. Chances are good that all the pieces will fit you well. (Go to Chapter 3 for help in identifying your body shape and developing a better understanding of what clothes can make you look your best. Go to Part IV for advice on how to dress fashionably for any occasion.)

Many women buy clothes that don’t fit, using the excuse that this gives them the incentive to get into shape or lose ten pounds. Some brides are able to meet such goals because they’re aiming for one particular and very important day in their lives, but most women don’t end up ever wearing those clothes. Of course, if you are aiming to lose weight (great!); I’m not trying to discourage you. But a more practical (and successful) strategy is to invest in pieces you can wear as the beautiful you that you are right now.

Make educated purchases

To make educated purchases, you have to understand a few fashion basics, like what styles look best on you, what fabrics are appropriate for certain seasons, and what colors are you. If you are not equipped with all the information you need, shopping efficiently can be challenging.

When you shop, look at the short term (“I just love the way this looks on me”) and the long term (“Is this something I must have in my closet?”). If you see a pair of trendy gladiator sandals, ask yourself, “Is this something I need, or should I use this money toward a great black cashmere cardigan?”

Buying trendier, less expensive items is fine, but buying quality pieces that can last you many seasons is essential. The decision-making process isn’t just about the way an article of clothing looks, but also how it was made. Head to Chapters 4 and 5 to pick up the required basics.

Determine where you want to fit in

A key to building your wardrobe is to decide what you want your overall personal style to be. If you’re a mother of three and spend most of your days playing with your children and carpooling, a good portion of your wardrobe will be geared to that. But you are also a woman with a personality of your own, and your wardrobe should have pieces of clothing that work off the playground as well.

So what should determine your style? Would you prefer to look like you’d fit right in walking down the streets of a fashion capital like New York, Milan, or Paris? Or are you more comfortable adopting the style more popular to the area where you live? (Figure 1-3 shows two outfits, one that would look good in a fashion center and another that is more mainstream.) Or do you want to identify with a particular group? If you work in an office, you need to under- stand the dress code of that environment, and when socializing among your friends, you want to dress appropriately for the occasion, all the while being true to your personal sense of style.

Figure 1-3: Your personal style is defined by many different aspects of your life.

During the course of a week, or maybe even a very hectic day, you could change your outfit over and over again, depending on where you are and where you’re going. But rather than consider playing clothes chameleon a chore, look at it as an endless series of opportunities to look gorgeous and express your personal style. To do that, you need to build up confidence in your ability to dress in the right attire no matter what the setting.

Figure out how you want the world to see you

What you choose to put on your body when you wake up in the morning says a lot about how you feel on any particular day. Even the most basic outfit can say so much. Take jeans and a T-shirt, for example — an ensemble most women can relate to. The number of combinations you can put together with these two items is endless, but each look sends out a very different message. If you’re going for cute, you can pair a T-shirt with boyfriend jeans (a baggy jean that’s often cuffed and distressed) and flip-flops (see Figure 1-4). If you’re going for “hot and sexy,” add jewelry and stilettos to your basic look, and you’ve gone from simple to sexy in a flash (see Figure 1-5). For a more sophisticated look, try a blazer over your T-shirt with a trouser jean and black pump (see Figure 1-6). And a cute sweatshirt with a pair of ripped jeans that you’ve had forever can show that even on a casual Sunday, you put effort into looking cozy yet adorable (see Figure 1-7).

Figure 1-4: A casual, cute look.

Figure 1-5: A great pair of jeans and high heels is a sexy look.

Now I understand that after a long work week, the last thing you want to do is try to look hot while running to get the newspapers. What I am saying is that, in the split-second of choosing what to wear for the day, make an effort to go the more flattering, put-together route. Doing so not only gives you more confidence to start the day, but it also prepares you for anything (or anyone) that comes your way! You may think of jeans and a T-shirt as only one kind of look, but even the most basic outfit can represent many different aspects of your personality, as Figures 1-4 through 1-7 show.

Figure 1-6: Jeans can be very sophisticated.

Most of the time, you pay attention to what you’re wearing because you’re going out of the house. When you’re home relaxing, you’re likely to throw on any old thing or your favorite sweats. (And, of course, that’s okay.) However, sexiness and personal style develop only with confidence. My point? You should feel your best at all times. If you’re sitting at home, do it in your favorite sweats and your coziest T-shirt. If you’re heading to the market in sweats, make them look casual but sexy (yes, there is a way to make sweats  look cute!).

To motivate your- self to abandon the “it doesn’t matter how I look” mentality, try this: Remind yourself that you may run into someone you haven’t seen in years. Nine times out of ten you won’t, but you may. I want you to look great and feel fabulous at all times because then you’ll impress the person who is most important to you: you.

Go for diversity

A spice rack with 25 herbs lets you express yourself so much better than a spice rack with only salt and pepper. The same is true of your wardrobe. The more variety you have to choose from, the more you can express your personal style, which is only possible when your wardrobe has the depth to match all sorts of moods.

Figure 1-7: Even cozy can be stylish.

When shopping, look at each purchase to see whether it expands your repertoire or is just another item like most of the others in your closet. Sure, you may love wearing gray, but if you already have numerous tops in your favorite color, try grabbing a top that highlights a different part of your personality. But always remember to buy only items that you’ll wear. Don’t buy a green top just because you don’t have one, if green isn’t a good color for you. The goal is to expand your wardrobe and express your style, all while staying in your color palette and wearing clothes that suit your body type.

If you’re not sure of the vibes you want to give off when you’re getting dressed in the morning, pick an outfit that allows you to add some variations. If you choose a monochromatic blouse, for example, stick a scarf (or a pair of fabulous chandelier earrings) in your purse, so that you can jazz it up if you end up going out for a drink after work. Try to think ahead. If your outfit is one that can be livened up, you’ll be able to say, “Let’s go” when someone suggests doing something fun.

Build your wardrobe to include both basics and trendy stuff

For most photo shoots, the person being photographed hires a stylist who brings various outfits to choose from to achieve the perfect look. When Dana and I were choosing what to wear for the front and back covers of this book, we just went shopping in my closet. We were laughing, saying, “We really do practice what we preach!” I had every basic item we needed to convey to you exactly what we wanted to. My point? Having basics in your wardrobe is a must. (The black dress on the back of the book is one I’ve had for eight years.) Now, I am not saying I don’t have trendy items in my closet — I do. But I’m careful when buying something that I know will be out next season, and I don’t spend as much money on it as I do on something I know will be around for a while. Your closet, too, should include the basics and a few trendy things.

Fitting Your Style to Your Budget

In creating a style, you’re going to run into a reality check, otherwise known as your clothing budget. If you happen to have an unlimited amount of money to spend on clothes, then you can skip this section. But because most people do have to watch what they spend, learning to shop within your budget is an important skill to develop.

Spend more on the basics, less on the trendier things

Some people approach clothes shopping as they do their grocery shopping. They make a list of what they need and go out searching for the cheapest price. While stretching your food dollars this way can be quite effective, it doesn’t always work with clothing. I encourage you to spend more on certain staples, items that will take you from season to season and look rich with any outfit. Trendier items are the pieces to save on because they may only last you the season. (In Part III, I explain what to look for so that even your “save” items will look like splurges.)

Sales are great times to buy staples, seasonless items, and classic pieces. Although the store just needs to clear space for new shipments, that classic pair of black Calvin Klein pants marked down and down again may fit perfectly in your wardrobe. Sale racks often take time (and patience, for that matter) to look through, but don’t walk by because you feel like sales mean something is of poor quality. Quite often, it’s just the opposite. (To find out more about this topic, check out Chapter 7.)

Take stock of your wardrobe

The temptation for many women to go out and buy clothing is a strong one. If you think your wardrobe has a hole that needs filling, you could just take the first opportunity to hit your local stores or surf the Web. But at some point you’ll likely run into the ceiling of your clothing budget, and you don’t want that to happen at a time when you need the perfect dress for a special occasion.

So don’t always be so quick to look for an opportunity to shop outside your closet. Shopping can give you a psychological boost, but if you’re using it as a way to lift your spirits rather than as a way to create a look for yourself, then you’re almost certain to miss both goals. Rather than reach for your credit card every time you feel like it, do what every clothing store does several times a year: Take inventory.

If you don’t take stock of what you already have in your closet, you’re likely to buy the same thing over and over again because that’s what you’re drawn to. Being organized and allowing yourself to really see what you have gives you the freedom to buy new pieces you may have otherwise overlooked.

I’m not suggesting you enter every item you own into an Excel spreadsheet. Still, you should take some time as a new season is about to arrive to go through all your clothes and give away whatever isn’t perfect for you. (For more on how to pare the ordinary or unexceptional from your closet, see the next section for a brief introduction on my 10 System and Chapter 2 for additional details.) At the same time, make a list of what you need and put down as many details as possible. For example, “a white button-down shirt to wear under blazers” may top your list. That way the next time you’re looking through the racks in your favorite store, you’ll able to fill in the gaps in your closet.

Some people give away items as soon as they buy a new one. While that method preserves closet space, it places unnecessary limits on you — especially if you’re a good shopper. There’s no reason to get rid of one pair of navy slacks just because you buy another pair, especially if you can wear the new pair in a different way. Maybe you wear one pair to work with ballet flats because they’re too short to wear with heels. Another pair of navy slacks that you can wear with heels wouldn’t be considered a repetitive item in your wardrobe. Although both slacks look similar, they serve different purposes.

Invest only in10s

My main goal in this book is to help you concentrate on quality instead of quantity. I would rather you own one black blazer that fits you perfectly and is of the best quality than four that are “eh” — which leads me to my 10 System: Every item you have should be evaluated on a scale of 1 to 10, and only 10s should remain in your closet. Every blazer, sweater, or pair of jeans (shall I go on?) must fit this requirement to keep a place in your fabulous closet. As you go through the next chapters, keep this scale in mind. (To find out more about the 10 System, see Chapter 2.)

Throughout this book, you’ll find tips on how to shop for key items, especially in the chapters in Part IV. Because these important garments have to be close to perfect, they may require the extra expense of being altered by a professional tailor. Although I try to help you save money throughout this book, in some instances, I encourage you to spend a little extra because it’ll pay off in the long run.

Figure 1-8: Look casual yet sophisticated with a white button-down under a sweater.

Prolong that new clothes feel

Putting on a new article of clothing is a great feeling. Even if no one notices, you know that your mood has been elevated. But after a while, that blouse (or pants or scarf) joins the ranks of all the other items in your closet. Even though it’s no worse for wear, it loses the punch it once had on your emotions. It’s no different than if you ate your favorite dish over and over. After a while, you’ll yawn instead of salivate when you see it on the menu.

While you can’t stop this process, you can slow it down. Learning how to rein- vent pieces you have is key. For example, a white button- down shirt can take you many different places. It can be worn under a sweater, as in Figure 1-8. When you are on vacation in a tropical place, it can be tied over a bathing suit and paired with a long skirt (see Figure 1-9). If you’re heading to work, it can be worn with a sweater-vest (see Figure 1-10). And finally, if you’re off to a fancy event, you can dress it up by pairing it with a sequin skirt, as in Figure 1-11.

Figure 1-9: Your white button- down will have you looking beach-chic.

Excessive buying is not the best way to estab- lish personal style. Being smart and having key, versatile pieces in your closet will make you the fashion queen you want to be!

Figure 1-10: A vest can be a perfect complement to a white button-down shirt.

A Last Important Point

Throughout this book I talk a lot about personal style. My hope is that you’ll use all the information here to figure out the overall image you want to project to the world. When all is said and done, no matter what you’re wearing, you have to be yourself. If that means certain styles are not for you, so be it. But with so much to choose from, you can be sure to find pieces that are perfect for you. And by the time you’ve finished reading this book, you’ll know just how to be the stylish woman you’ve always dreamed of being!

Figure 1-11: You can dress up your white button down if heading to a fancy affair.

Fashion 101

In This Chapter

▶ Who’s who in the fashion industry

▶ Taking important steps toward developing your own style

▶ Fitting your wardrobe needs into your budget

▶ Making the impression you want

You may have been born naked, but minutes later a nurse wrapped you in swaddling (how chic an outfit is that!), and you’ve been wearing clothes ever since. While some women have mastered the art of fashion and look fabulous all the time, many still struggle to figure it all out. If you are one of the women still searching for what exactly to wear every day, you’ve come to the right place. Whether you’re going to the grocery store or heading to a gala, I want you to feel your best at all times, no exceptions.

As children, most of us were dressed by our parents. As teenagers, you likely just followed the trend du jour. But as adults, the options are end- less. Because the choices are so vast, how can you possibly arrive at your very own style? After all, while you may find your one true love after dating less than a dozen people, you can fall in love with a dozen pairs of shoes in one store alone. Now, the ideal solution for many people would be to hire a personal shopper and leave the decision-making to expert hands. Unfortunately, few people can afford that route. So the next best plan is to gain a better understanding of how to develop your personal style. This chapter gives you all the info you need to begin that journey.

The Real Trendsetters

Literally thousands of fashion designers around the world are busily turning out mountains of clothing, and as the media continues to focus more and more attention on the fashion industry, hundreds of new designers are trying to make their way into the field every year. With so many working fashion designers, it’s not surprising that you, the fashion consumer, have a flood of new clothing to choose from. If you feel like you’re swimming upstream in this tide of satin, leather, and beading, try to take comfort in knowing you’re not alone.

While each new fashion season brings out a variety of new styles that make you feel like everything in your closet is dated, not every designer has an impact on the latest trends. There’s a filtering process between the designers’ creations and the hottest trends that land in your closet. Figure 1-1 shows a designer outfit and a mass market outfit based on that design.

You may wonder how all those who make the cut seem to know that it’s time to raise hemlines or douse the world in plum. You may also wonder what role, if any, the buying public has in this process. Getting the answers to these questions helps you figure out what you need to wear day and night.

Although fashion may seem like a one-way street, with all the clothes streaming out of Seventh Avenue and into the malls and boutiques nearest you, the truth is far different. Quite a number of people actually set the trends: designers, buyers, fashion houses, the fashion media, and, believe it or not, you. You have a much greater influence on what designs actually end up in the stores than you may think. The following sections outline the key players.

Designers

Designers are people with creative vision. They have an idea about the way clothing should look, and they take this idea all the way from an initial sketch to an actual sample to, hopefully, a store near you. Top designers dis- play their latest creations at shows held in New York, Paris, and Milan (see Figure 1-2).

Figure 1-1: From the runway to real life.

Naturally the big name designers have more clout than those that are lesser known, but even they aren’t operating in a vacuum. Everyone in the fashion industry has his or her finger in the wind, trying to decipher what the next trend may be. And the fashion designers aren’t the only ones navigating public taste. The buyers (who pick and choose from the designers’ collections, determining what makes it from the runway to you) also have a huge impact.

Figure 1-2: A design on a runway.

Buyers

Buyers are the people who decide, for every upcoming season, what will be hanging on the clothing racks in a store near you. Every store — from large department stores to small boutiques — has a buyer (or buyers). The buyers for the major retail outlets are one of the most important filters of the fashion trade. They have to be sure about what they’re buying, because if the general consumer has different tastes, the stores end up with a ton of extra merchandise that will just end up on the sale rack.

Back in 1919, an attempt was made to artificially change the course of fashion. Pressure was put on the fashion industry to stop raising hemlines because showing so much leg was thought to be damaging America’s morals. Designers responded and agreed to send hemlines back downward. The only problem was that women weren’t fans of the new fad, and so the longer skirts and dresses bombed, and American women roared into the 1920s wearing flapper dresses.

Fashion houses and their ads

Fashion houses are the companies behind the bigger name designers. They’re considered houses because the company bears the designer’s name, even after the designer has retired and someone else has taken over designing the label. The fashion houses influence trends and, consequently, sales through the use of advertising. If you look through a fashion magazine, you see that most of the pages are ads. These ads, which are just as visually interesting and informative as the editorial pages, can have quite an impact. For example, department stores didn’t want to stock designer jeans back in the 1980s, but the ads placed by the jeans companies created the public demand, and it wasn’t long before those jeans were in every store.

Fashion media

Another important set of players is the fashion media, which is led by the major fashion magazines such as Vogue, Elle, and Harper’s Bazaar. The fashion media decode what’s happening on the runways and download all the information to you. Anyone interested in fashion looks to these trend-setting publications (or their Web sites) to see what’s in style and what is the next “must have.”

Long before the designs hit the stores, the magazines’ editors choose what to feature in their magazines from the hundreds of looks on the runway. Because the fashion shows are about six months ahead of the next fashion season, and the fashion magazines are sent to the printer two to three months ahead of when they hit the newsstand, the editors, who consult closely with the fashion designers, try to look ahead and anticipate what will be popular. Because of their position as a fashion authority, their decisions exert a considerable amount of influence.

The other players

Other prognosticators also have a role to play. One example is the Color Marketing Group, a non-profit organization made up of design professionals from all sorts of fields, from fashion to interior design, who get together every year and decide that, say, powder blue will be “the” color for the next year. That sets off the fabric and yarn manufacturers to stock up on material for the fashion designers in this color.

Trend forecasters also play a role. Most of the big design houses have either in-house staff whose job it is to know what trends are coming around the corner, or they hire firms (yes, there are firms that do this) that specialize in predicting trends. These people are well versed in what’s cool in the celebrity world, with teenagers, and pretty much everything going on in pop culture. They also have to keep abreast of what all the other designers are doing. Not only do they know what’s going on now, but they are also steps ahead. Remember, the designers are designing their collections way ahead of when the trends will be “in.” They show their lines six months ahead of when they will be in stores and are designing even further ahead than that.

And stylists like Dana Ravich, who along with Pierre co-authored this book, dress stars for big red carpet events and for appearances on television shows or in print. If a celebrity is wearing a dress from an up-and-coming designer, that could be his or her ticket to fame, too.

You

The designers, buyers, and magazines can tell you what’s in style and guide you toward what to buy, but at the end of the day, it’s up to you. What makes the most sense for you, your lifestyle, and your body type determines what you purchase. After you develop your personal style, you can take cues from all these outside influences in order to navigate through all this information and make the choices that are right for you.

Getting Your Personal Style Started

Some of the factors that go into deciding what to wear include where you live, what your interests are, where you work, what you like to do when socializing, and what colors and styles suit your body type. By weaving all these factors together (as Chapter 2 does), you can create your own personal style. To find out what belongs in your personal wardrobe, see Chapter 7.

Decide which trends can work for you

If you pick up a fashion magazine and look at the outfits the beautiful models are wearing, you may think, “What does this have to do with how I dress?” But even though you may not buy one of those designer outfits, it can give you clues on how to dress fashionably.

To begin with, when flipping the pages of a fashion magazine, stop and take a good look at those outfits that attract you. Decide what you find appealing about that particular look. You should even take notes. If you see a dress with an off-the-shoulder style showing off the model’s collarbones and that’s a body part you like, take note. If, while flipping the pages, you see that several other designers are also making off-the-shoulder styles, you’ve spotted a trend that you’ll want to make yours.

Because magazines usually show photos of clothes for coming seasons, these designs may not yet be in stores. So tear out the pictures that you like. They can help when you’re shopping because you’ll know exactly what to look for. And if you’re tempted to buy a random dress at the end of the current season just because it’s on sale, the pictures you’re carrying around will inspire you to wait for the style you’re seeking. This is especially important if your budget only allows you to buy a few pieces.

Know your body

Of course clothing comes in all different sizes, but just because an outfit comes in your size doesn’t mean that it suits you. Some designers know how to make creations that can be adapted to women who don’t fit the runway mold. Other designers have a great eye for color and fabric, but when it comes to cut, they’re more the one-size-better-fit-all types. Your job is to learn what your body shape is and find out what types of clothes flatter your figure. If you find a designer whose fit works for your body, check out the rest of his or her line. Chances are good that all the pieces will fit you well. (Go to Chapter 3 for help in identifying your body shape and developing a better understanding of what clothes can make you look your best. Go to Part IV for advice on how to dress fashionably for any occasion.)

Many women buy clothes that don’t fit, using the excuse that this gives them the incentive to get into shape or lose ten pounds. Some brides are able to meet such goals because they’re aiming for one particular and very important day in their lives, but most women don’t end up ever wearing those clothes. Of course, if you are aiming to lose weight (great!); I’m not trying to discourage you. But a more practical (and successful) strategy is to invest in pieces you can wear as the beautiful you that you are right now.

Make educated purchases

To make educated purchases, you have to understand a few fashion basics, like what styles look best on you, what fabrics are appropriate for certain seasons, and what colors are you. If you are not equipped with all the information you need, shopping efficiently can be challenging.

When you shop, look at the short term (“I just love the way this looks on me”) and the long term (“Is this something I must have in my closet?”). If you see a pair of trendy gladiator sandals, ask yourself, “Is this something I need, or should I use this money toward a great black cashmere cardigan?”

Buying trendier, less expensive items is fine, but buying quality pieces that can last you many seasons is essential. The decision-making process isn’t just about the way an article of clothing looks, but also how it was made. Head to Chapters 4 and 5 to pick up the required basics.

Determine where you want to fit in

A key to building your wardrobe is to decide what you want your overall personal style to be. If you’re a mother of three and spend most of your days playing with your children and carpooling, a good portion of your wardrobe will be geared to that. But you are also a woman with a personality of your own, and your wardrobe should have pieces of clothing that work off the playground as well.

So what should determine your style? Would you prefer to look like you’d fit right in walking down the streets of a fashion capital like New York, Milan, or Paris? Or are you more comfortable adopting the style more popular to the area where you live? (Figure 1-3 shows two outfits, one that would look good in a fashion center and another that is more mainstream.) Or do you want to identify with a particular group? If you work in an office, you need to under- stand the dress code of that environment, and when socializing among your friends, you want to dress appropriately for the occasion, all the while being true to your personal sense of style.

Figure 1-3: Your personal style is defined by many different aspects of your life.

During the course of a week, or maybe even a very hectic day, you could change your outfit over and over again, depending on where you are and where you’re going. But rather than consider playing clothes chameleon a chore, look at it as an endless series of opportunities to look gorgeous and express your personal style. To do that, you need to build up confidence in your ability to dress in the right attire no matter what the setting.

Figure out how you want the world to see you

What you choose to put on your body when you wake up in the morning says a lot about how you feel on any particular day. Even the most basic outfit can say so much. Take jeans and a T-shirt, for example — an ensemble most women can relate to. The number of combinations you can put together with these two items is endless, but each look sends out a very different message. If you’re going for cute, you can pair a T-shirt with boyfriend jeans (a baggy jean that’s often cuffed and distressed) and flip-flops (see Figure 1-4). If you’re going for “hot and sexy,” add jewelry and stilettos to your basic look, and you’ve gone from simple to sexy in a flash (see Figure 1-5). For a more sophisticated look, try a blazer over your T-shirt with a trouser jean and black pump (see Figure 1-6). And a cute sweatshirt with a pair of ripped jeans that you’ve had forever can show that even on a casual Sunday, you put effort into looking cozy yet adorable (see Figure 1-7).

Figure 1-4: A casual, cute look.

Figure 1-5: A great pair of jeans and high heels is a sexy look.

Now I understand that after a long work week, the last thing you want to do is try to look hot while running to get the newspapers. What I am saying is that, in the split-second of choosing what to wear for the day, make an effort to go the more flattering, put-together route. Doing so not only gives you more confidence to start the day, but it also prepares you for anything (or anyone) that comes your way! You may think of jeans and a T-shirt as only one kind of look, but even the most basic outfit can represent many different aspects of your personality, as Figures 1-4 through 1-7 show.

Figure 1-6: Jeans can be very sophisticated.

Most of the time, you pay attention to what you’re wearing because you’re going out of the house. When you’re home relaxing, you’re likely to throw on any old thing or your favorite sweats. (And, of course, that’s okay.) However, sexiness and personal style develop only with confidence. My point? You should feel your best at all times. If you’re sitting at home, do it in your favorite sweats and your coziest T-shirt. If you’re heading to the market in sweats, make them look casual but sexy (yes, there is a way to make sweats  look cute!).

To motivate your- self to abandon the “it doesn’t matter how I look” mentality, try this: Remind yourself that you may run into someone you haven’t seen in years. Nine times out of ten you won’t, but you may. I want you to look great and feel fabulous at all times because then you’ll impress the person who is most important to you: you.

Go for diversity

A spice rack with 25 herbs lets you express yourself so much better than a spice rack with only salt and pepper. The same is true of your wardrobe. The more variety you have to choose from, the more you can express your personal style, which is only possible when your wardrobe has the depth to match all sorts of moods.

Figure 1-7: Even cozy can be stylish.

When shopping, look at each purchase to see whether it expands your repertoire or is just another item like most of the others in your closet. Sure, you may love wearing gray, but if you already have numerous tops in your favorite color, try grabbing a top that highlights a different part of your personality. But always remember to buy only items that you’ll wear. Don’t buy a green top just because you don’t have one, if green isn’t a good color for you. The goal is to expand your wardrobe and express your style, all while staying in your color palette and wearing clothes that suit your body type.

If you’re not sure of the vibes you want to give off when you’re getting dressed in the morning, pick an outfit that allows you to add some variations. If you choose a monochromatic blouse, for example, stick a scarf (or a pair of fabulous chandelier earrings) in your purse, so that you can jazz it up if you end up going out for a drink after work. Try to think ahead. If your outfit is one that can be livened up, you’ll be able to say, “Let’s go” when someone suggests doing something fun.

Build your wardrobe to include both basics and trendy stuff

For most photo shoots, the person being photographed hires a stylist who brings various outfits to choose from to achieve the perfect look. When Dana and I were choosing what to wear for the front and back covers of this book, we just went shopping in my closet. We were laughing, saying, “We really do practice what we preach!” I had every basic item we needed to convey to you exactly what we wanted to. My point? Having basics in your wardrobe is a must. (The black dress on the back of the book is one I’ve had for eight years.) Now, I am not saying I don’t have trendy items in my closet — I do. But I’m careful when buying something that I know will be out next season, and I don’t spend as much money on it as I do on something I know will be around for a while. Your closet, too, should include the basics and a few trendy things.

Fitting Your Style to Your Budget

In creating a style, you’re going to run into a reality check, otherwise known as your clothing budget. If you happen to have an unlimited amount of money to spend on clothes, then you can skip this section. But because most people do have to watch what they spend, learning to shop within your budget is an important skill to develop.

Spend more on the basics, less on the trendier things

Some people approach clothes shopping as they do their grocery shopping. They make a list of what they need and go out searching for the cheapest price. While stretching your food dollars this way can be quite effective, it doesn’t always work with clothing. I encourage you to spend more on certain staples, items that will take you from season to season and look rich with any outfit. Trendier items are the pieces to save on because they may only last you the season. (In Part III, I explain what to look for so that even your “save” items will look like splurges.)

Sales are great times to buy staples, seasonless items, and classic pieces. Although the store just needs to clear space for new shipments, that classic pair of black Calvin Klein pants marked down and down again may fit perfectly in your wardrobe. Sale racks often take time (and patience, for that matter) to look through, but don’t walk by because you feel like sales mean something is of poor quality. Quite often, it’s just the opposite. (To find out more about this topic, check out Chapter 7.)

Take stock of your wardrobe

The temptation for many women to go out and buy clothing is a strong one. If you think your wardrobe has a hole that needs filling, you could just take the first opportunity to hit your local stores or surf the Web. But at some point you’ll likely run into the ceiling of your clothing budget, and you don’t want that to happen at a time when you need the perfect dress for a special occasion.

So don’t always be so quick to look for an opportunity to shop outside your closet. Shopping can give you a psychological boost, but if you’re using it as a way to lift your spirits rather than as a way to create a look for yourself, then you’re almost certain to miss both goals. Rather than reach for your credit card every time you feel like it, do what every clothing store does several times a year: Take inventory.

If you don’t take stock of what you already have in your closet, you’re likely to buy the same thing over and over again because that’s what you’re drawn to. Being organized and allowing yourself to really see what you have gives you the freedom to buy new pieces you may have otherwise overlooked.

I’m not suggesting you enter every item you own into an Excel spreadsheet. Still, you should take some time as a new season is about to arrive to go through all your clothes and give away whatever isn’t perfect for you. (For more on how to pare the ordinary or unexceptional from your closet, see the next section for a brief introduction on my 10 System and Chapter 2 for additional details.) At the same time, make a list of what you need and put down as many details as possible. For example, “a white button-down shirt to wear under blazers” may top your list. That way the next time you’re looking through the racks in your favorite store, you’ll able to fill in the gaps in your closet.

Some people give away items as soon as they buy a new one. While that method preserves closet space, it places unnecessary limits on you — especially if you’re a good shopper. There’s no reason to get rid of one pair of navy slacks just because you buy another pair, especially if you can wear the new pair in a different way. Maybe you wear one pair to work with ballet flats because they’re too short to wear with heels. Another pair of navy slacks that you can wear with heels wouldn’t be considered a repetitive item in your wardrobe. Although both slacks look similar, they serve different purposes.

Invest only in10s

My main goal in this book is to help you concentrate on quality instead of quantity. I would rather you own one black blazer that fits you perfectly and is of the best quality than four that are “eh” — which leads me to my 10 System: Every item you have should be evaluated on a scale of 1 to 10, and only 10s should remain in your closet. Every blazer, sweater, or pair of jeans (shall I go on?) must fit this requirement to keep a place in your fabulous closet. As you go through the next chapters, keep this scale in mind. (To find out more about the 10 System, see Chapter 2.)

Throughout this book, you’ll find tips on how to shop for key items, especially in the chapters in Part IV. Because these important garments have to be close to perfect, they may require the extra expense of being altered by a professional tailor. Although I try to help you save money throughout this book, in some instances, I encourage you to spend a little extra because it’ll pay off in the long run.

Figure 1-8: Look casual yet sophisticated with a white button-down under a sweater.

Prolong that new clothes feel

Putting on a new article of clothing is a great feeling. Even if no one notices, you know that your mood has been elevated. But after a while, that blouse (or pants or scarf) joins the ranks of all the other items in your closet. Even though it’s no worse for wear, it loses the punch it once had on your emotions. It’s no different than if you ate your favorite dish over and over. After a while, you’ll yawn instead of salivate when you see it on the menu.

While you can’t stop this process, you can slow it down. Learning how to rein- vent pieces you have is key. For example, a white button- down shirt can take you many different places. It can be worn under a sweater, as in Figure 1-8. When you are on vacation in a tropical place, it can be tied over a bathing suit and paired with a long skirt (see Figure 1-9). If you’re heading to work, it can be worn with a sweater-vest (see Figure 1-10). And finally, if you’re off to a fancy event, you can dress it up by pairing it with a sequin skirt, as in Figure 1-11.

Figure 1-9: Your white button- down will have you looking beach-chic.

Excessive buying is not the best way to estab- lish personal style. Being smart and having key, versatile pieces in your closet will make you the fashion queen you want to be!

Figure 1-10: A vest can be a perfect complement to a white button-down shirt.

A Last Important Point

Throughout this book I talk a lot about personal style. My hope is that you’ll use all the information here to figure out the overall image you want to project to the world. When all is said and done, no matter what you’re wearing, you have to be yourself. If that means certain styles are not for you, so be it. But with so much to choose from, you can be sure to find pieces that are perfect for you. And by the time you’ve finished reading this book, you’ll know just how to be the stylish woman you’ve always dreamed of being!

Figure 1-11: You can dress up your white button down if heading to a fancy affair.

Très Chic: Threads for Special Occasions

In This Chapter

▶ Dressing for semiformal to formal affairs

▶ Commemorating the holidays in style

▶ Understanding what to wear and what not to wear to weddings

▶ Shopping guide for special event clothing

If you’ve been reading this book straight through, you know by now that I want you to feel like a 10 anytime you leave the house. When you head to the market, you should look put together in your sweats or jeans. When you’re off to work, you should look and feel like you’re ready for a productive day. And when you’re getting ready for a special occasion, well, the fabulous you better be ready for a fabulous night out!

In this chapter, I explain the differences between white tie, black tie, and cocktail attire; how to dress for holidays and weddings; and how to shop for whatever else you may have coming up that falls in between!

Evening Wear

How many times have you received an invitation in the mail and said to your- self, “What am I going to wear to this!?” Well, we’ve all been there, excited for an occasion but less than thrilled about deciding what to wear to it — especially when you don’t quite know the fashion rules that apply to the different types of events, be they white tie, black tie, cocktail, or something in between. It can be confusing and the rules are a bit subjective, but I steer you in the right direction in this section.

In real estate, the key phrase is location, location, location. When deciding what to wear for an evening out, the same phrase applies. When picking out your attire, you have to keep in mind where you’re going and who your audience is.

Dressing for a cocktail party

Cocktails anyone? Now we’re talking my language! A cocktail party can celebrate many different occasions. Some people hold cocktail parties just for the fun of it while others center this type of party around birthdays, anniversaries, promotions, and so on. A typical cocktail party usually starts somewhere between 6:00 and 9:00 p.m. and lasts for a couple of hours. Light food — a selection of hors d’oeuvres, for example — is served, but not a sit-down dinner, hence the name cocktail party!

What should you wear to a cocktail party? This type of event is much more casual than a black-tie event but dressier than a dinner out with friends. The following can clear up any confusion you have about cocktail attire.

✓ Dress length: If you wear a dress, cocktail length is the way to go (obviously). That means that your dress should hit your leg right below the knee, as shown in Figure 11-1. But because there are no strict rules when it comes to a cocktail party, if you have fab legs, feel free to wear a shorter dress. How short should you go? With a cocktail party, you have a lot of leeway. How short you can go depends on a few things. Is it business or purely social? When it’s business, it’s still safe to wear something above the knee as long as it’s not a mini, but if you have doubts, always err on the longer side. If it’s purely social, use your judgment. In this case you can get away with something shorter.

Figure 11-1: A dress that hits right below the knee is always a safe bet for a cocktail party.

For cocktail parties, you aren’t limited to cocktail dresses. If you feel more comfortable in a two-piece outfit, go that route. For example, a sequin skirt paired with a beautiful cashmere sweater is perfect cocktail attire (see Figure 11-2). You can also go with a beautiful pair of slacks and a dressy blouse. Wear what you look best in. “Cocktail attire” is a looser term than “black tie.” You’ve got room to play around, so play!

✓ Color: What is the appropriate color to wear to a cocktail party? Well, that depends on where the function is and on what day of the week. A little black dress always works. But if you’re always in your LBD, try to get away from that. If you’re heading to a work cocktail party at 6:00 p.m. on a Tuesday, I suggest sticking with more neutral tones in a fabric, like wool or silk, that’s not shiny; avoid the red strap- less satin dress. If, on the other hand, you’re going to your best friend’s home on a Saturday night for a soiree, go for it! No colors are off-limits, as long as you’re season appropriate. (See Chapter 5 for more on color.)

✓ Accessories: Obviously, the accessories you choose depends on what dress you decide to wear. I love wearing simple dresses and switching up my accessories. Bold statement necklaces or chandelier earrings always complete an otherwise plain-looking dress. If your

Figure 11-2: Cocktail dresses aren’t required at cocktail parties.

dress already has a lot of embellishment, go simple with the accessories. Fun, fun, fun. This is the type of event where you can really express your personal style, especially with the right statement piece.

If you question what to wear, don’t be afraid to ask other women whose style you trust and who are attending the same event. Other partygoers may offer some clues as to what is the most appropriate thing to wear. Maybe one of them has been to this venue or knows the crowd better than you do and can give you guidance. For example, if the event you’re going to involves a more mature crowd, you may want to dress a bit more conservatively. If you’re heading to a soiree with a crowd you know well and are comfortable with, your outfit can take a sexier turn! Remember, if someone is inviting you to a cocktail party, they want you to have fun. So have fun!

If you have a lot of cocktail parties or other events coming up and are on a tight budget, buy one classic dress in a neutral color. You can switch up the shoes, accessories, and clutch and create many different looks. Also, don’t forget the power of a shawl. A beautifully made, adorned wrap can take a dress from simple to sizzling in a flash! Figure 11-3 shows how a dress can take on a different look.

Figure 11-3: Changing accessories and adding a shawl can change the look of a dress.

Attending a black-tie affair

So you’re heading to a black-tie affair. Should be fun, right? Is someone get- ting married? Are you attending a bat or bar mitzvah? Is your loved one being honored for being fabulous? Whatever the occasion, I assume you know it’s black-tie, because, well, the invitation says so.

Men are lucky when the invite says “Black Tie” because they pretty much know what to wear: A tuxedo of some sort is the dress du jour. The only big choice a man has to make is what tie or cummerbund to wear! Women, on the other hand, face a multitude of choices. Do you wear a floor length, tea length (one that hits mid-calf; see Figure 11-4), or cocktail length dress (one that hits just below the knee). Do you choose a black dress or take a chance with a bright color? Do you wear your hair up or let your hair down (so to speak). Time of day, location, and the nature of the event are just a few of the factors you must take into account when deciding on the big pick.

Don’t stress out yet! Here’s the good news. When an invitation says “Black Tie,” the person or people throwing the party are pretty much telling you how they want you to look. They want you dressed to the nines! A long dress is the safe choice for an affair of this magnitude, but going shorter (as I mentioned) is no longer a faux pas. Similarly, wearing that fabulous long black number is totally appropriate, but it’s also acceptable to redefine, within boundaries, what black tie looks like. While I’d advise against whipping out that sexy dress from New Year’s Eve, you can, for most black-tie occasions, choose a dress with color or adornments that highlight your personal style. Next time you’re perusing the racks for that perfect dress, keep these ideas in mind because you are allowed to have fun when dressing up — I promise!

Here are some pointers for choosing an outfit for a black-tie affair:

✓ Know your audience. If the person or people hosting the event are more conservative, follow suit. You can never go wrong with a simple, floor length dress when attending a black-tie affair.

Black-tie attire can range from conservative to whimsical. For example, a couple I’m close with had a black-tie wedding on a Saturday night, and I debated what to wear to it. The couple is very edgy and far from conservative, so I knew I could play around with my black-tie look. I chose a cocktail length, midnight blue dress — did I mention my fab accessories? I loved it. It was perfect for that wedding.

Figure 11-4: Show your personal style when picking what to wear to a black-tie event.

✓ Pay attention to the event’s timing. A black-tie event on the weekend is often dressier than a black-tie event held during the week.

✓ Have fun! Make sure your personal style shows when you saunter into your event. Confidence is key!

If you plan to wear that long black dress you have already worn to an occasion with the same group of people, switch it up: Buy a big statement necklace or earrings to serve as the centerpiece of that look. If First Lady Michelle Obama can repeat an outfit, so can you!

Tuxes for women

Yves Saint Laurent was the first to show women in tuxedos. The year was 1962, and since then, many designers have shown women in either full tuxes or outfits with a tuxedo motif. But it’s definitely a daring selection for most occasions. My advice? Unless you know your audience is

one that is on the edgier side, and you feel totally comfortable in one, stay away from the female version of tuxes! True, megastar Rihanna did get a lot of play for wearing a black Dolce & Gabbana suit to the Met Costume Institute Gala in 2009, but, hey, she’s Rihanna!

White-tie affairs: The most formal of all

A white-tie affair is the most formal event you can attend. State dinners at the White House and similar high status locations distinguish themselves by being extra formal — that is, white tie. Most people never attend an event of this stature (I never have). But knowing what’s expected is important, just in case your invitation comes in the mail!

White-tie events are more formal than black-tie events, and a long gown is always a must (see Figure 11-5). As I said, many white-tie events are state dinners, when the head of state of one country visits another. But other occasions may also call for white-tie dress, such as fancy balls or cotillions. And of course, any group that wants to be very formal can host a white-tie event (although this is very rare).

Because of the formal nature of these events, there are certain expectations regarding attire. The dress for a white-tie evening is not only an evening gown, but a rather modest one. Bare shoulders are generally not acceptable, and women often wear opera length gloves (reaching up the arm just past the elbow, usually made of satin). Silk or satin shawls are usually worn as well. One exception: A woman from a foreign country attending a state dinner may wear the dressiest clothing representative of her country, such as a sari for a woman from India.

If you find yourself with an invitation to a white-tie affair, bring me as a date! Seriously, if you’re heading to this type of affair, there is no room for error. Rules must be followed.

Figure 11-5: Attending a white-tie affair? Follow the strict dress code.

Dressing for the Holidays

There are two schools when it comes to dressing for the holidays. Some people like to wear items to commemorate the season: Santa Claus sweaters, socks with dreidels, and other items with a seasonal feel. Now I don’t want to sound like the Grinch, but if you’re going this route, I suggest you do it minimally (especially if you’re leaving the house). The only way to pull off this look in style is to pick one gimmicky item and make it the focal point of your outfit. Everything else you wear should be a solid color and nothing else should have details.

Another way to commemorate the holidays is to go in a subtle direction. You can wear seasonal colors and materials that give off a holiday vibe. This section shows you how to be the life of the party without looking like the centerpiece!

Wearing holiday colors

A great way to celebrate the holidays is to wear the season’s colors. You can still look the part without shouting out the particular holiday you’re enjoying by doing the following:

✓ Mix holiday colors with neutral ones. Pick one color (red or green for Christmas or, if you celebrate Chanukah, blue or silver) and pair that color with a complementary one. For Thanksgiving, maybe try a top in the pumpkin or cranberry family. No matter your faith or the type of holiday you’re celebrating, the goal is the same: Stay festive while remaining stylish.

If you don’t look good in the colors of the season, don’t wear them. Stay true to your style, your color scheme, and your body type.

✓ Try accessories. An alternative to wearing a color representative of a particular holiday is to pick an accessory that gives you the same feel. Chandelier earrings that sparkle will put you right in the mix with other partygoers. For more on accessories, head to the section “Accessorizing holiday-style.”

You can get a dressier holiday look by wearing a sweater or dress with sequins, beading, or paillettes, which give you the sparkle and the festive feel with- out the gimmick (see Figure 11-6). These choices are sophisticated and appropriate for everything from a holiday dinner to the office holiday party.

Figure 11-6: Sequins can give you holiday style without the gimmick.

Holiday dress styles

What dress styles are acceptable for the holidays? Good question! As always, your LBD is acceptable, as is your favorite cocktail dress. But you have other alternatives to play around with, too.

If you love your shoulders, try an asymmetrical or strapless dress. If you love your legs, try a shorter dress with a higher neckline. If you want to show a little cleavage (and I stress a little), try something with a plunging neckline. Whatever your preference, just pick a dress that’s made with a winter-like material and in a color that’s seasonally appropriate. Now of course “winter- like” material is different depending on what part of the country you’re in. If you live in New York, go with velvet or satin. If you’re spending winter gallivanting in Miami (lucky you!), you can wear a silk-satin or chiffon number.

If you choose to go the short route, make sure you don’t push the envelope. If you have any doubt that your dress is too short, it is. Always err on the longer side. Sexy is really sexy when only one part of your body is on display. If you’re showing a little cleavage, don’t wear a short dress. If you’re wearing a short dress, don’t wear something low cut. You never want to be the girl in the revealing dress that everyone is talking about for all the wrong reasons.

Choosing materials that give a holiday vibe

Delving a little deeper into materials appropriate for the holidays, certain fabrics make you think “party” as soon as you see them. For example, a blazer with satin lapels is understated yet celebratory because of the extra shine provided by the satin. Velvet and cashmere give you that same holiday feel because they provide an added sense of luxury. I go skiing for the holidays. After a day on the slopes, my favorite thing to do is lounge around in my cash- mere sweater and pants (which I invested in eight years ago and still have) and drink hot chocolate. Cozy, right? What’s great about wearing materials that are holiday-like is that you probably have many items sitting in the back of your closet that, when paired with the right things, will work perfectly.

During the holidays, you can wear an outfit that’s a little more dramatic. For example, a black velvet pant suit may be too much to wear to just any old event in the winter, but at a holiday party, the same pant suit paired with a simple tank and fun jewelry makes you queen of the night. Any other night you’d put the blazer with jeans or the pants with a blouse. Bottom line: It’s all about how you put your outfit together.

Patent leather is another holiday staple (in fact, the material is so versatile it should be in your closet year round). Patent leather shoes, handbags, and belts are all items that make an outfit pop. The trick is to pick one piece to add to what you’re already wearing. For example, if you plan to wear a velvet blazer with jeans, grab a white button-down shirt, silver chandelier earrings, and a pair of black patent pumps, and you’re instantly holiday chic (see Figure 11-7).

Patent leather shows scuff marks more readily than other materials, so avoid the lighter colors where scuffs are more obvious. Bad shiny shoes can ruin even the most stylish outfit.

Accessorizing holiday style

A way to look chic without wearing holiday-obvious clothing is to shimmer with metallic accents. A great way to do this is with silver and gold jewelry. The good thing is you likely already have pieces that you can combine to make a holiday statement. Here’s some advice based on questions I get all the time:

✓ “Does brown (or black or any other particular color) go with gold or silver earrings?” Here’s the deal: Any solid color can go with yellow gold, silver, white gold, or platinum.

You run into a problem when you get into a top or a dress that already has embellishments. Almost 100 percent of the time (and I say “almost” because there are always exceptions in life), you should wear an accessory that matches what is highlighted in the dress. If your dress has gold paillettes around the neckline, a simple gold hoop works best.

✓ “Is it okay to mix metals?” The answer is yes, yes, yes! Don’t be afraid to mix your gold and silver necklaces. Different length chains (and even ones with charms or lockets), when mixed correctly, can be chic and festive. Experiment with what you have. You’ll be surprised how you can reinvent jewelry you’ve had for years.

Figure 11-7: A sophisticated, festive look.

Jewelry is not the only way to accessorize for the holidays. A shawl with metallic accents is very chic. So are metallic colored shoes and handbags. Again, the key is to not overdo it. If you’re wearing all black, try pairing gold sandals and a gold clutch with your outfit. (Metallics are considered neutral, so use them instead of basic black to spruce up your wardrobe.) I’m also a huge fan of small hair accessories! (Did I say “small” in a strong enough way?) I often wear low buns with a very small studded bobby pin on the side. You almost don’t see the bobby pin, but when you do, it becomes a conversation piece. Another trick is to take a festive brooch you’ve had forever and pin it to a clutch. I also do this with jean jackets (on the pocket).

Open-toe shoes in winter — yes or no?

It’s perfectly fine to have your feet exposed during the winter. Here’s a little guidance to help you determine if open-toe is the way to go:

✓ Let common sense be your guide . If you think you’ll be outside for an extended period of time, go with a shoe that keeps you warmer. But if you’re out in the elements only long enough to get in and out of the car, you can wear a sandal during the holidays whatever the climate.

✓ When you wear open-toe sandals in the winter, stick with darker colors that have more of a wintery feel . Keep brights, pastels, and light colored shoes packed up until spring and summer come around! Black, gold, and silver are acceptable year round.

✓ If you wear an open-toe shoe or sandal, go sans stockings . For more on hosiery do’s and don’ts, head to Chapter 14.

The holidays are a time that you should really have fun with what you wear. Don’t forget you can make a statement with any article of clothing you put on your body. If you’re set on wearing that little black dress, how about pairing a great pair of heels with it? Nothing says “Happy Holidays!” like a great pair of red stilettos! Have fun, don’t be too theme-y, and be sexy! No matter your age, when you feel great, you’ll enjoy yourself more — trust me!

What to Wear to a Wedding Chances are you’ve opened a wedding invitation, seen the requested attire, and said to yourself, “I have nothing to wear to this!” Well, you’re not alone. Nowadays, with all the different types of weddings, who can keep up? When it comes to a wedding, many variables affect what you should and shouldn’t wear. The following sections go into more detail, but it all boils down to these two key factors:

✓ The couple whose wedding you’re attending: Take into account the bride and groom’s personality and adopt their vibe into your personal style. If the bride wants you to look “hot” because she has a great friend she wants to fix you up with, then opt for a sexier dress. If the couple is more conservative, better to err on that side and go with a more conservative dress. If the couple is more relaxed, you can get away with having some fun with your look. Bottom line: Respect the couple hosting the affair and choose something that expresses your style while staying within the boundaries of what’s appropriate.

✓ The location of the wedding: Consider the location and setting of the wedding. If you’re heading to an outdoor barbeque in the summer, you can never go wrong with a nice sundress and flat sandals. A formal wed- ding in a cathedral requires something more formal.

The following sections go into more details.

Type of attire specified on the invitation

Many invitations specify a type of attire, but even when you open the enve- lope and the invite spells it out for you, you’re still left wondering, “What am I going to wear?” The following helps you decipher what is what when it comes to wedding wear:

✓ Casual: An invitation that says “Casual” clearly indicates the couple is planning a more informal wedding and requests casual dress. An informal wedding can be anything from a barefoot beach wedding to a barbeque where flip-flops are the requested footwear. Because of the variation in what constitutes casual dress and what any particular couple envisions, figuring out what to wear can often get tricky. As I mentioned earlier, think about the couple whose wedding you’re attending and, if you need to, feel free to ask them what other people are wearing.

✓ Cocktail: If the wedding invitation says “Cocktail Attire,” a cocktail dress is most appropriate. I recommend staying away from wearing a floor length dress, which for the most part shouts black tie (if they wanted you that dressed up, they would have said so). See the earlier section “Dressing for a cocktail party” for advice on choosing an appropriate cocktail dress. And remember, cocktail attire generally means cocktails are in the mix, so get ready to have some fun!

✓ Black tie: If the invitation says “Black Tie,” you’ll see a lot of floor length dresses, but don’t be afraid to wear a cocktail dress if that is what looks best on you. You can be elegant and formal and totally appropriate without wearing a floor length gown. For almost every black-tie event, a dress that comes right below the knee is totally appropriate (for wed- dings, I wouldn’t go too short — no more than an inch above the knee, tops). The earlier section “Attending a black-tie affair” offers more advice on black-tie attire.

Figure 11-8 shows types of attire for weddings: casual, cocktail, and black tie.

Figure 11-8: Different styles of wedding attire, from left: casual, cocktail, black tie.

If you’re at a loss, don’t be afraid to ask questions. E-mail or call the bride and ask what most people are wearing. If you don’t have that kind of relationship with the bride, ask a mutual friend who is attending as well. Between that, the invitation, and the advice in this section, you have all the info you need to pick the perfect dress!

I know I’ve said this before, but I’m saying it again: It’s always better to be slightly overdressed than underdressed — always.

Time of day

Knowing the time of the wedding is a huge factor in helping you decide what fabulous dress you’re going to choose. Fortunately, you only have to look at the invitation to get this info! The key thing to know is that nighttime wed- dings are, for the most part, dressier than those held during the day. Here are the details:

✓ Daytime weddings: Typically, daytime weddings are informal or semiformal. A shorter dress is fine, as is a suit. If you go with a suit, don’t wear one in a Wall Street pinstripe or anything that looks too corporate. Feel free to wear something in a lighter color. And if any part of the wedding is going to be on grass or sand, remember to leave the heels behind. If you want to wear two pieces, keep it on the dressier side, such as a satin A-line skirt paired with a dressy blouse. For the most part, you also want to stay away from black if you’re attending a daytime wedding. Weddings are fun and festive, and black, although dressy, tends to be more conservative and serious. So while you can get away with black at night (as long as you dress it up with fancy or statement jewelry), during the day it’s more appropriate to wear something happier.

Don’t feel you can go ultra casual just because the wedding is during the day. You’re still going to a wedding. Whether it’s 11:00 a.m.or 11:00 p.m., it’s still the bride’s most important day, so dress up for it! When my friend Pam got married at 11:00 a.m. on a Sunday in Miami, I wore a long sundress and some people even wore cocktail length dresses.

People always ask me whether it’s okay to wear sunglasses for a daytime wedding held outdoors. The answer is yes. You want to be able to see the ceremony without squinting!

✓ Evening weddings: Woo hoo! Dress up time! Evening weddings almost always have a dress code. “Cocktail Attire” or “Black Tie” will likely be nestled in the corner of your invitation. This type of affair calls for a cock- tail or black-tie dress. For everything you need to know, see the earlier sections “Dressing for a cocktail party” or “Attending a black-tie affair.”

The setting

Where the wedding takes place certainly plays a part in what’s appropriate attire. Different venues call for different types of attire. A wedding that’s held in one of the top hotels in a big city is going to be more formal than a wedding held at a local restaurant in a small town. If you’re going to a country club wedding, expect people to be dressed up; if you’re off to a night club type of venue, the outfits will be edgier; and a beach wedding is more casual. Location is definitely one of the key ingredients when figuring out what to wear.

If you’re going to a wedding at a venue you’re familiar with, the dress is easier to predict. Never heard of the venue? Then let Google be your friend! Type the name of the venue into the search field to find out what the venue’s like.

If the ceremony is outdoors where you’ll be walking on grass, sand, or cobble- stones, here’s a great invention to put on your heels to keep them protected: SoleMates (see Figure 11-9). These plastic heel covers are intended to keep your slim sticks from sinking into grass, grates, or other tough-to-manage surfaces. Check them out at www.thesolemates.com.

©Jeffrey Weir, thesolemates.com

Figure 11-9: SoleMates let you walk comfortably on uneven surfaces.

A wedding that takes place in a house of worship generally means that you need to dress in the manner appropriate to that location. If you’re unsure, the simplest solution is to ask the bride, or you can call ahead to the house of worship, though their guidelines may be stricter than the ones the bride will provide. In any case, you can rarely go wrong if you bring along some sort of wrap just for the service.

ave a great dress that’s perfect for the reception but not quite as conservative as you want it to be for the wedding ceremony itself? Pair it with a shawl. With a shawl, you can transition your dress seamlessly from sexy to conservative. A wrap can also be good to have on hand if the reception hall is very well air-conditioned or if the air temperature drops as you swing from late after- noon to evening.

General rules for all weddings

While no two weddings are exactly alike, most weddings follow the same basic pattern. For example, usually a religious ceremony precedes the reception, and that means you have to take the rules for dressing in a house of worship into account as well as the party afterward. The following are some other basic guidelines:

✓ Don’t wear white. One wardrobe no-no when it comes to weddings is never wear white, ivory, cream, or any color in that family to a wedding, or even to a rehearsal dinner for that matter. White is normally reserved for the bride.

✓ Stay away from the color the bridesmaids are wearing. It’s a little awkward if you’re the only non-bridesmaid in peach. You’ll look like a wedding party wannabe.

How low can you go? The neckline dilemma

When it comes to plunging necklines, there’s always the question of how much is too much? To arrive at the right answer for a wedding, con- sider the following:

✓ How well-endowed you are . If you stick with the theory that less is more, bigger busted women may want to opt for a dress that is not low cut. A sweetheart neck (see Chapter 9) or strapless dress would be flattering and appropriate choices. If you’re smaller around the bust area and want to wear a dress with a plunging neckline,

you can. Just make sure that nothing that shouldn’t be exposed is exposed. (If necessary take precautions like using double-sided tape.) As long as you can be comfortable and move around and not worry about falling out of your dress, you should be fine.

✓ Whose party you’re attending . If the couple is more conservative, it’s more respectful and appropriate to dress on the more conservative side. As much as you’d like to be noticed for your taste and style, you don’t want to stick out like a sore thumb.

✓ It’s okay to break out the dressier accessories. Weddings are certainly the occasion to wear those special pieces that you normally don’t get the chance to wear. This goes for jewelry, a fancy clutch, or dressy heels. (But be careful not to over accessorize; see Chapter 14 for details.)

If you’re someone who buys something and then waits to wear it for that “special” occasion, listen up! I want you to feel special all the time. So in addition to wearing that jewelry to your next big occasion, try to incorporate some of it with a more casual outfit. Your good things should be worn, not stored!

Shopping for Evening Attire and Clothing for Other Special Events Regardless of your budget, when shopping for clothing for special events, make your first stop a store that carries high-end designer gowns and dresses. Why? Because you’ll learn the current trends and see what’s hot at the moment. With this info in mind, you can then head to the stores that fit your budget and find dresses that are of a similar style to the more expensive ones. So once you get the lay of the land, begin searching more seriously elsewhere (unless you happen to find the perfect designer dress on sale — lucky you!).

Next, look for a style that is most flattering for your body. For example, in 2009 asymmetrical necklines were all the rage at the awards shows, but if you don’t have fabulous arms, this isn’t a trend you should adopt. Instead, pick the body part you like most and accentuate it. If you love your bust line but hate your hips, a plunging neckline is the answer. If you carry most of your weight in the lower half of your body, try picking a dress that has patterns or embellishments on the upper half of it.

Whether you’re a size 8 or a size 18, I want you to feel fabulous! That means highlighting the parts of your body you’re confident about and choosing cloth- ing that helps camouflage what you consider your flaws. Here are some specific pointers:

✓ Don’t shy away from color; just wear it the right way. As a general rule, darker colors are more slimming. But don’t feel like you have to buy black every time you go shopping. If you carry most of your weight in the lower part of your body, for example, choose a dress with a plunging neckline or a top that is detailed or ornate. This way you draw the attention to the upper half of your body.

✓ Find a feature you like that you can focus on. This is all about being real and honest with yourself (not to mention giving yourself a break).

If you look in the mirror and say, “I hate my stomach, thighs, tush, and arms,” you’re going to have a hard time finding a dress. But if you look and say, “My arms are good, but I don’t love the way my hips look,” you have enough to work with to find the perfect outfit. In this case, buy a sleeveless A-line dress, which will show off your arms and camouflage your hips.

✓ Think about the material the dress is made of. Some gowns are made of heavier fabrics and others are made of very wispy ones. You have to know which type works best for your own shape. A more structured dress made of a heavier fabric gives you more support and camouflages more, whereas a flowing, wispy dress is more likely to be made of a thinner, possibly sheer material and more revealing. You can find more detailed information on how to accentuate your attributes, no matter what your body type, in Chapter 3.

When you try on dresses, make sure you look put together so that you can envision, at least to some degree, what you’re going to look like. If you plan to wear your hair a certain way, try to wear your hair in that ’do. No, you don’t need to go to the salon before you go shopping. Instead, fake it! Simple hair clips that pull your hair away from your face, for example, may give you a more formal look. Also don’t forget to wear shoes with about the same heel height as the shoes you’ll be wearing. Everything helps when making a significant purchase.

Très Chic: Threads for Special Occasions

In This Chapter

▶ Dressing for semiformal to formal affairs

▶ Commemorating the holidays in style

▶ Understanding what to wear and what not to wear to weddings

▶ Shopping guide for special event clothing

If you’ve been reading this book straight through, you know by now that I want you to feel like a 10 anytime you leave the house. When you head to the market, you should look put together in your sweats or jeans. When you’re off to work, you should look and feel like you’re ready for a productive day. And when you’re getting ready for a special occasion, well, the fabulous you better be ready for a fabulous night out!

In this chapter, I explain the differences between white tie, black tie, and cocktail attire; how to dress for holidays and weddings; and how to shop for whatever else you may have coming up that falls in between!

Evening Wear

How many times have you received an invitation in the mail and said to your- self, “What am I going to wear to this!?” Well, we’ve all been there, excited for an occasion but less than thrilled about deciding what to wear to it — especially when you don’t quite know the fashion rules that apply to the different types of events, be they white tie, black tie, cocktail, or something in between. It can be confusing and the rules are a bit subjective, but I steer you in the right direction in this section.

In real estate, the key phrase is location, location, location. When deciding what to wear for an evening out, the same phrase applies. When picking out your attire, you have to keep in mind where you’re going and who your audience is.

Dressing for a cocktail party

Cocktails anyone? Now we’re talking my language! A cocktail party can celebrate many different occasions. Some people hold cocktail parties just for the fun of it while others center this type of party around birthdays, anniversaries, promotions, and so on. A typical cocktail party usually starts somewhere between 6:00 and 9:00 p.m. and lasts for a couple of hours. Light food — a selection of hors d’oeuvres, for example — is served, but not a sit-down dinner, hence the name cocktail party!

What should you wear to a cocktail party? This type of event is much more casual than a black-tie event but dressier than a dinner out with friends. The following can clear up any confusion you have about cocktail attire.

✓ Dress length: If you wear a dress, cocktail length is the way to go (obviously). That means that your dress should hit your leg right below the knee, as shown in Figure 11-1. But because there are no strict rules when it comes to a cocktail party, if you have fab legs, feel free to wear a shorter dress. How short should you go? With a cocktail party, you have a lot of leeway. How short you can go depends on a few things. Is it business or purely social? When it’s business, it’s still safe to wear something above the knee as long as it’s not a mini, but if you have doubts, always err on the longer side. If it’s purely social, use your judgment. In this case you can get away with something shorter.

Figure 11-1: A dress that hits right below the knee is always a safe bet for a cocktail party.

For cocktail parties, you aren’t limited to cocktail dresses. If you feel more comfortable in a two-piece outfit, go that route. For example, a sequin skirt paired with a beautiful cashmere sweater is perfect cocktail attire (see Figure 11-2). You can also go with a beautiful pair of slacks and a dressy blouse. Wear what you look best in. “Cocktail attire” is a looser term than “black tie.” You’ve got room to play around, so play!

✓ Color: What is the appropriate color to wear to a cocktail party? Well, that depends on where the function is and on what day of the week. A little black dress always works. But if you’re always in your LBD, try to get away from that. If you’re heading to a work cocktail party at 6:00 p.m. on a Tuesday, I suggest sticking with more neutral tones in a fabric, like wool or silk, that’s not shiny; avoid the red strap- less satin dress. If, on the other hand, you’re going to your best friend’s home on a Saturday night for a soiree, go for it! No colors are off-limits, as long as you’re season appropriate. (See Chapter 5 for more on color.)

✓ Accessories: Obviously, the accessories you choose depends on what dress you decide to wear. I love wearing simple dresses and switching up my accessories. Bold statement necklaces or chandelier earrings always complete an otherwise plain-looking dress. If your

Figure 11-2: Cocktail dresses aren’t required at cocktail parties.

dress already has a lot of embellishment, go simple with the accessories. Fun, fun, fun. This is the type of event where you can really express your personal style, especially with the right statement piece.

If you question what to wear, don’t be afraid to ask other women whose style you trust and who are attending the same event. Other partygoers may offer some clues as to what is the most appropriate thing to wear. Maybe one of them has been to this venue or knows the crowd better than you do and can give you guidance. For example, if the event you’re going to involves a more mature crowd, you may want to dress a bit more conservatively. If you’re heading to a soiree with a crowd you know well and are comfortable with, your outfit can take a sexier turn! Remember, if someone is inviting you to a cocktail party, they want you to have fun. So have fun!

If you have a lot of cocktail parties or other events coming up and are on a tight budget, buy one classic dress in a neutral color. You can switch up the shoes, accessories, and clutch and create many different looks. Also, don’t forget the power of a shawl. A beautifully made, adorned wrap can take a dress from simple to sizzling in a flash! Figure 11-3 shows how a dress can take on a different look.

Figure 11-3: Changing accessories and adding a shawl can change the look of a dress.

Attending a black-tie affair

So you’re heading to a black-tie affair. Should be fun, right? Is someone get- ting married? Are you attending a bat or bar mitzvah? Is your loved one being honored for being fabulous? Whatever the occasion, I assume you know it’s black-tie, because, well, the invitation says so.

Men are lucky when the invite says “Black Tie” because they pretty much know what to wear: A tuxedo of some sort is the dress du jour. The only big choice a man has to make is what tie or cummerbund to wear! Women, on the other hand, face a multitude of choices. Do you wear a floor length, tea length (one that hits mid-calf; see Figure 11-4), or cocktail length dress (one that hits just below the knee). Do you choose a black dress or take a chance with a bright color? Do you wear your hair up or let your hair down (so to speak). Time of day, location, and the nature of the event are just a few of the factors you must take into account when deciding on the big pick.

Don’t stress out yet! Here’s the good news. When an invitation says “Black Tie,” the person or people throwing the party are pretty much telling you how they want you to look. They want you dressed to the nines! A long dress is the safe choice for an affair of this magnitude, but going shorter (as I mentioned) is no longer a faux pas. Similarly, wearing that fabulous long black number is totally appropriate, but it’s also acceptable to redefine, within boundaries, what black tie looks like. While I’d advise against whipping out that sexy dress from New Year’s Eve, you can, for most black-tie occasions, choose a dress with color or adornments that highlight your personal style. Next time you’re perusing the racks for that perfect dress, keep these ideas in mind because you are allowed to have fun when dressing up — I promise!

Here are some pointers for choosing an outfit for a black-tie affair:

✓ Know your audience. If the person or people hosting the event are more conservative, follow suit. You can never go wrong with a simple, floor length dress when attending a black-tie affair.

Black-tie attire can range from conservative to whimsical. For example, a couple I’m close with had a black-tie wedding on a Saturday night, and I debated what to wear to it. The couple is very edgy and far from conservative, so I knew I could play around with my black-tie look. I chose a cocktail length, midnight blue dress — did I mention my fab accessories? I loved it. It was perfect for that wedding.

Figure 11-4: Show your personal style when picking what to wear to a black-tie event.

✓ Pay attention to the event’s timing. A black-tie event on the weekend is often dressier than a black-tie event held during the week.

✓ Have fun! Make sure your personal style shows when you saunter into your event. Confidence is key!

If you plan to wear that long black dress you have already worn to an occasion with the same group of people, switch it up: Buy a big statement necklace or earrings to serve as the centerpiece of that look. If First Lady Michelle Obama can repeat an outfit, so can you!

Tuxes for women

Yves Saint Laurent was the first to show women in tuxedos. The year was 1962, and since then, many designers have shown women in either full tuxes or outfits with a tuxedo motif. But it’s definitely a daring selection for most occasions. My advice? Unless you know your audience is

one that is on the edgier side, and you feel totally comfortable in one, stay away from the female version of tuxes! True, megastar Rihanna did get a lot of play for wearing a black Dolce & Gabbana suit to the Met Costume Institute Gala in 2009, but, hey, she’s Rihanna!

White-tie affairs: The most formal of all

A white-tie affair is the most formal event you can attend. State dinners at the White House and similar high status locations distinguish themselves by being extra formal — that is, white tie. Most people never attend an event of this stature (I never have). But knowing what’s expected is important, just in case your invitation comes in the mail!

White-tie events are more formal than black-tie events, and a long gown is always a must (see Figure 11-5). As I said, many white-tie events are state dinners, when the head of state of one country visits another. But other occasions may also call for white-tie dress, such as fancy balls or cotillions. And of course, any group that wants to be very formal can host a white-tie event (although this is very rare).

Because of the formal nature of these events, there are certain expectations regarding attire. The dress for a white-tie evening is not only an evening gown, but a rather modest one. Bare shoulders are generally not acceptable, and women often wear opera length gloves (reaching up the arm just past the elbow, usually made of satin). Silk or satin shawls are usually worn as well. One exception: A woman from a foreign country attending a state dinner may wear the dressiest clothing representative of her country, such as a sari for a woman from India.

If you find yourself with an invitation to a white-tie affair, bring me as a date! Seriously, if you’re heading to this type of affair, there is no room for error. Rules must be followed.

Figure 11-5: Attending a white-tie affair? Follow the strict dress code.

Dressing for the Holidays

There are two schools when it comes to dressing for the holidays. Some people like to wear items to commemorate the season: Santa Claus sweaters, socks with dreidels, and other items with a seasonal feel. Now I don’t want to sound like the Grinch, but if you’re going this route, I suggest you do it minimally (especially if you’re leaving the house). The only way to pull off this look in style is to pick one gimmicky item and make it the focal point of your outfit. Everything else you wear should be a solid color and nothing else should have details.

Another way to commemorate the holidays is to go in a subtle direction. You can wear seasonal colors and materials that give off a holiday vibe. This section shows you how to be the life of the party without looking like the centerpiece!

Wearing holiday colors

A great way to celebrate the holidays is to wear the season’s colors. You can still look the part without shouting out the particular holiday you’re enjoying by doing the following:

✓ Mix holiday colors with neutral ones. Pick one color (red or green for Christmas or, if you celebrate Chanukah, blue or silver) and pair that color with a complementary one. For Thanksgiving, maybe try a top in the pumpkin or cranberry family. No matter your faith or the type of holiday you’re celebrating, the goal is the same: Stay festive while remaining stylish.

If you don’t look good in the colors of the season, don’t wear them. Stay true to your style, your color scheme, and your body type.

✓ Try accessories. An alternative to wearing a color representative of a particular holiday is to pick an accessory that gives you the same feel. Chandelier earrings that sparkle will put you right in the mix with other partygoers. For more on accessories, head to the section “Accessorizing holiday-style.”

You can get a dressier holiday look by wearing a sweater or dress with sequins, beading, or paillettes, which give you the sparkle and the festive feel with- out the gimmick (see Figure 11-6). These choices are sophisticated and appropriate for everything from a holiday dinner to the office holiday party.

Figure 11-6: Sequins can give you holiday style without the gimmick.

Holiday dress styles

What dress styles are acceptable for the holidays? Good question! As always, your LBD is acceptable, as is your favorite cocktail dress. But you have other alternatives to play around with, too.

If you love your shoulders, try an asymmetrical or strapless dress. If you love your legs, try a shorter dress with a higher neckline. If you want to show a little cleavage (and I stress a little), try something with a plunging neckline. Whatever your preference, just pick a dress that’s made with a winter-like material and in a color that’s seasonally appropriate. Now of course “winter- like” material is different depending on what part of the country you’re in. If you live in New York, go with velvet or satin. If you’re spending winter gallivanting in Miami (lucky you!), you can wear a silk-satin or chiffon number.

If you choose to go the short route, make sure you don’t push the envelope. If you have any doubt that your dress is too short, it is. Always err on the longer side. Sexy is really sexy when only one part of your body is on display. If you’re showing a little cleavage, don’t wear a short dress. If you’re wearing a short dress, don’t wear something low cut. You never want to be the girl in the revealing dress that everyone is talking about for all the wrong reasons.

Choosing materials that give a holiday vibe

Delving a little deeper into materials appropriate for the holidays, certain fabrics make you think “party” as soon as you see them. For example, a blazer with satin lapels is understated yet celebratory because of the extra shine provided by the satin. Velvet and cashmere give you that same holiday feel because they provide an added sense of luxury. I go skiing for the holidays. After a day on the slopes, my favorite thing to do is lounge around in my cash- mere sweater and pants (which I invested in eight years ago and still have) and drink hot chocolate. Cozy, right? What’s great about wearing materials that are holiday-like is that you probably have many items sitting in the back of your closet that, when paired with the right things, will work perfectly.

During the holidays, you can wear an outfit that’s a little more dramatic. For example, a black velvet pant suit may be too much to wear to just any old event in the winter, but at a holiday party, the same pant suit paired with a simple tank and fun jewelry makes you queen of the night. Any other night you’d put the blazer with jeans or the pants with a blouse. Bottom line: It’s all about how you put your outfit together.

Patent leather is another holiday staple (in fact, the material is so versatile it should be in your closet year round). Patent leather shoes, handbags, and belts are all items that make an outfit pop. The trick is to pick one piece to add to what you’re already wearing. For example, if you plan to wear a velvet blazer with jeans, grab a white button-down shirt, silver chandelier earrings, and a pair of black patent pumps, and you’re instantly holiday chic (see Figure 11-7).

Patent leather shows scuff marks more readily than other materials, so avoid the lighter colors where scuffs are more obvious. Bad shiny shoes can ruin even the most stylish outfit.

Accessorizing holiday style

A way to look chic without wearing holiday-obvious clothing is to shimmer with metallic accents. A great way to do this is with silver and gold jewelry. The good thing is you likely already have pieces that you can combine to make a holiday statement. Here’s some advice based on questions I get all the time:

✓ “Does brown (or black or any other particular color) go with gold or silver earrings?” Here’s the deal: Any solid color can go with yellow gold, silver, white gold, or platinum.

You run into a problem when you get into a top or a dress that already has embellishments. Almost 100 percent of the time (and I say “almost” because there are always exceptions in life), you should wear an accessory that matches what is highlighted in the dress. If your dress has gold paillettes around the neckline, a simple gold hoop works best.

✓ “Is it okay to mix metals?” The answer is yes, yes, yes! Don’t be afraid to mix your gold and silver necklaces. Different length chains (and even ones with charms or lockets), when mixed correctly, can be chic and festive. Experiment with what you have. You’ll be surprised how you can reinvent jewelry you’ve had for years.

Figure 11-7: A sophisticated, festive look.

Jewelry is not the only way to accessorize for the holidays. A shawl with metallic accents is very chic. So are metallic colored shoes and handbags. Again, the key is to not overdo it. If you’re wearing all black, try pairing gold sandals and a gold clutch with your outfit. (Metallics are considered neutral, so use them instead of basic black to spruce up your wardrobe.) I’m also a huge fan of small hair accessories! (Did I say “small” in a strong enough way?) I often wear low buns with a very small studded bobby pin on the side. You almost don’t see the bobby pin, but when you do, it becomes a conversation piece. Another trick is to take a festive brooch you’ve had forever and pin it to a clutch. I also do this with jean jackets (on the pocket).

Open-toe shoes in winter — yes or no?

It’s perfectly fine to have your feet exposed during the winter. Here’s a little guidance to help you determine if open-toe is the way to go:

✓ Let common sense be your guide . If you think you’ll be outside for an extended period of time, go with a shoe that keeps you warmer. But if you’re out in the elements only long enough to get in and out of the car, you can wear a sandal during the holidays whatever the climate.

✓ When you wear open-toe sandals in the winter, stick with darker colors that have more of a wintery feel . Keep brights, pastels, and light colored shoes packed up until spring and summer come around! Black, gold, and silver are acceptable year round.

✓ If you wear an open-toe shoe or sandal, go sans stockings . For more on hosiery do’s and don’ts, head to Chapter 14.

The holidays are a time that you should really have fun with what you wear. Don’t forget you can make a statement with any article of clothing you put on your body. If you’re set on wearing that little black dress, how about pairing a great pair of heels with it? Nothing says “Happy Holidays!” like a great pair of red stilettos! Have fun, don’t be too theme-y, and be sexy! No matter your age, when you feel great, you’ll enjoy yourself more — trust me!

What to Wear to a Wedding Chances are you’ve opened a wedding invitation, seen the requested attire, and said to yourself, “I have nothing to wear to this!” Well, you’re not alone. Nowadays, with all the different types of weddings, who can keep up? When it comes to a wedding, many variables affect what you should and shouldn’t wear. The following sections go into more detail, but it all boils down to these two key factors:

✓ The couple whose wedding you’re attending: Take into account the bride and groom’s personality and adopt their vibe into your personal style. If the bride wants you to look “hot” because she has a great friend she wants to fix you up with, then opt for a sexier dress. If the couple is more conservative, better to err on that side and go with a more conservative dress. If the couple is more relaxed, you can get away with having some fun with your look. Bottom line: Respect the couple hosting the affair and choose something that expresses your style while staying within the boundaries of what’s appropriate.

✓ The location of the wedding: Consider the location and setting of the wedding. If you’re heading to an outdoor barbeque in the summer, you can never go wrong with a nice sundress and flat sandals. A formal wed- ding in a cathedral requires something more formal.

The following sections go into more details.

Type of attire specified on the invitation

Many invitations specify a type of attire, but even when you open the enve- lope and the invite spells it out for you, you’re still left wondering, “What am I going to wear?” The following helps you decipher what is what when it comes to wedding wear:

✓ Casual: An invitation that says “Casual” clearly indicates the couple is planning a more informal wedding and requests casual dress. An informal wedding can be anything from a barefoot beach wedding to a barbeque where flip-flops are the requested footwear. Because of the variation in what constitutes casual dress and what any particular couple envisions, figuring out what to wear can often get tricky. As I mentioned earlier, think about the couple whose wedding you’re attending and, if you need to, feel free to ask them what other people are wearing.

✓ Cocktail: If the wedding invitation says “Cocktail Attire,” a cocktail dress is most appropriate. I recommend staying away from wearing a floor length dress, which for the most part shouts black tie (if they wanted you that dressed up, they would have said so). See the earlier section “Dressing for a cocktail party” for advice on choosing an appropriate cocktail dress. And remember, cocktail attire generally means cocktails are in the mix, so get ready to have some fun!

✓ Black tie: If the invitation says “Black Tie,” you’ll see a lot of floor length dresses, but don’t be afraid to wear a cocktail dress if that is what looks best on you. You can be elegant and formal and totally appropriate without wearing a floor length gown. For almost every black-tie event, a dress that comes right below the knee is totally appropriate (for wed- dings, I wouldn’t go too short — no more than an inch above the knee, tops). The earlier section “Attending a black-tie affair” offers more advice on black-tie attire.

Figure 11-8 shows types of attire for weddings: casual, cocktail, and black tie.

Figure 11-8: Different styles of wedding attire, from left: casual, cocktail, black tie.

If you’re at a loss, don’t be afraid to ask questions. E-mail or call the bride and ask what most people are wearing. If you don’t have that kind of relationship with the bride, ask a mutual friend who is attending as well. Between that, the invitation, and the advice in this section, you have all the info you need to pick the perfect dress!

I know I’ve said this before, but I’m saying it again: It’s always better to be slightly overdressed than underdressed — always.

Time of day

Knowing the time of the wedding is a huge factor in helping you decide what fabulous dress you’re going to choose. Fortunately, you only have to look at the invitation to get this info! The key thing to know is that nighttime wed- dings are, for the most part, dressier than those held during the day. Here are the details:

✓ Daytime weddings: Typically, daytime weddings are informal or semiformal. A shorter dress is fine, as is a suit. If you go with a suit, don’t wear one in a Wall Street pinstripe or anything that looks too corporate. Feel free to wear something in a lighter color. And if any part of the wedding is going to be on grass or sand, remember to leave the heels behind. If you want to wear two pieces, keep it on the dressier side, such as a satin A-line skirt paired with a dressy blouse. For the most part, you also want to stay away from black if you’re attending a daytime wedding. Weddings are fun and festive, and black, although dressy, tends to be more conservative and serious. So while you can get away with black at night (as long as you dress it up with fancy or statement jewelry), during the day it’s more appropriate to wear something happier.

Don’t feel you can go ultra casual just because the wedding is during the day. You’re still going to a wedding. Whether it’s 11:00 a.m.or 11:00 p.m., it’s still the bride’s most important day, so dress up for it! When my friend Pam got married at 11:00 a.m. on a Sunday in Miami, I wore a long sundress and some people even wore cocktail length dresses.

People always ask me whether it’s okay to wear sunglasses for a daytime wedding held outdoors. The answer is yes. You want to be able to see the ceremony without squinting!

✓ Evening weddings: Woo hoo! Dress up time! Evening weddings almost always have a dress code. “Cocktail Attire” or “Black Tie” will likely be nestled in the corner of your invitation. This type of affair calls for a cock- tail or black-tie dress. For everything you need to know, see the earlier sections “Dressing for a cocktail party” or “Attending a black-tie affair.”

The setting

Where the wedding takes place certainly plays a part in what’s appropriate attire. Different venues call for different types of attire. A wedding that’s held in one of the top hotels in a big city is going to be more formal than a wedding held at a local restaurant in a small town. If you’re going to a country club wedding, expect people to be dressed up; if you’re off to a night club type of venue, the outfits will be edgier; and a beach wedding is more casual. Location is definitely one of the key ingredients when figuring out what to wear.

If you’re going to a wedding at a venue you’re familiar with, the dress is easier to predict. Never heard of the venue? Then let Google be your friend! Type the name of the venue into the search field to find out what the venue’s like.

If the ceremony is outdoors where you’ll be walking on grass, sand, or cobble- stones, here’s a great invention to put on your heels to keep them protected: SoleMates (see Figure 11-9). These plastic heel covers are intended to keep your slim sticks from sinking into grass, grates, or other tough-to-manage surfaces. Check them out at www.thesolemates.com.

©Jeffrey Weir, thesolemates.com

Figure 11-9: SoleMates let you walk comfortably on uneven surfaces.

A wedding that takes place in a house of worship generally means that you need to dress in the manner appropriate to that location. If you’re unsure, the simplest solution is to ask the bride, or you can call ahead to the house of worship, though their guidelines may be stricter than the ones the bride will provide. In any case, you can rarely go wrong if you bring along some sort of wrap just for the service.

ave a great dress that’s perfect for the reception but not quite as conservative as you want it to be for the wedding ceremony itself? Pair it with a shawl. With a shawl, you can transition your dress seamlessly from sexy to conservative. A wrap can also be good to have on hand if the reception hall is very well air-conditioned or if the air temperature drops as you swing from late after- noon to evening.

General rules for all weddings

While no two weddings are exactly alike, most weddings follow the same basic pattern. For example, usually a religious ceremony precedes the reception, and that means you have to take the rules for dressing in a house of worship into account as well as the party afterward. The following are some other basic guidelines:

✓ Don’t wear white. One wardrobe no-no when it comes to weddings is never wear white, ivory, cream, or any color in that family to a wedding, or even to a rehearsal dinner for that matter. White is normally reserved for the bride.

✓ Stay away from the color the bridesmaids are wearing. It’s a little awkward if you’re the only non-bridesmaid in peach. You’ll look like a wedding party wannabe.

How low can you go? The neckline dilemma

When it comes to plunging necklines, there’s always the question of how much is too much? To arrive at the right answer for a wedding, con- sider the following:

✓ How well-endowed you are . If you stick with the theory that less is more, bigger busted women may want to opt for a dress that is not low cut. A sweetheart neck (see Chapter 9) or strapless dress would be flattering and appropriate choices. If you’re smaller around the bust area and want to wear a dress with a plunging neckline,

you can. Just make sure that nothing that shouldn’t be exposed is exposed. (If necessary take precautions like using double-sided tape.) As long as you can be comfortable and move around and not worry about falling out of your dress, you should be fine.

✓ Whose party you’re attending . If the couple is more conservative, it’s more respectful and appropriate to dress on the more conservative side. As much as you’d like to be noticed for your taste and style, you don’t want to stick out like a sore thumb.

✓ It’s okay to break out the dressier accessories. Weddings are certainly the occasion to wear those special pieces that you normally don’t get the chance to wear. This goes for jewelry, a fancy clutch, or dressy heels. (But be careful not to over accessorize; see Chapter 14 for details.)

If you’re someone who buys something and then waits to wear it for that “special” occasion, listen up! I want you to feel special all the time. So in addition to wearing that jewelry to your next big occasion, try to incorporate some of it with a more casual outfit. Your good things should be worn, not stored!

Shopping for Evening Attire and Clothing for Other Special Events Regardless of your budget, when shopping for clothing for special events, make your first stop a store that carries high-end designer gowns and dresses. Why? Because you’ll learn the current trends and see what’s hot at the moment. With this info in mind, you can then head to the stores that fit your budget and find dresses that are of a similar style to the more expensive ones. So once you get the lay of the land, begin searching more seriously elsewhere (unless you happen to find the perfect designer dress on sale — lucky you!).

Next, look for a style that is most flattering for your body. For example, in 2009 asymmetrical necklines were all the rage at the awards shows, but if you don’t have fabulous arms, this isn’t a trend you should adopt. Instead, pick the body part you like most and accentuate it. If you love your bust line but hate your hips, a plunging neckline is the answer. If you carry most of your weight in the lower half of your body, try picking a dress that has patterns or embellishments on the upper half of it.

Whether you’re a size 8 or a size 18, I want you to feel fabulous! That means highlighting the parts of your body you’re confident about and choosing cloth- ing that helps camouflage what you consider your flaws. Here are some specific pointers:

✓ Don’t shy away from color; just wear it the right way. As a general rule, darker colors are more slimming. But don’t feel like you have to buy black every time you go shopping. If you carry most of your weight in the lower part of your body, for example, choose a dress with a plunging neckline or a top that is detailed or ornate. This way you draw the attention to the upper half of your body.

✓ Find a feature you like that you can focus on. This is all about being real and honest with yourself (not to mention giving yourself a break).

If you look in the mirror and say, “I hate my stomach, thighs, tush, and arms,” you’re going to have a hard time finding a dress. But if you look and say, “My arms are good, but I don’t love the way my hips look,” you have enough to work with to find the perfect outfit. In this case, buy a sleeveless A-line dress, which will show off your arms and camouflage your hips.

✓ Think about the material the dress is made of. Some gowns are made of heavier fabrics and others are made of very wispy ones. You have to know which type works best for your own shape. A more structured dress made of a heavier fabric gives you more support and camouflages more, whereas a flowing, wispy dress is more likely to be made of a thinner, possibly sheer material and more revealing. You can find more detailed information on how to accentuate your attributes, no matter what your body type, in Chapter 3.

When you try on dresses, make sure you look put together so that you can envision, at least to some degree, what you’re going to look like. If you plan to wear your hair a certain way, try to wear your hair in that ’do. No, you don’t need to go to the salon before you go shopping. Instead, fake it! Simple hair clips that pull your hair away from your face, for example, may give you a more formal look. Also don’t forget to wear shoes with about the same heel height as the shoes you’ll be wearing. Everything helps when making a significant purchase.